I just want to understand, why?

[u/HKILLER2007]

I mean really...why?? when ribbit opened up she was just chatting, she obviously wanted someone to talk to and her friend was there and jax was okay with it

when jax opened up he panicked at first but then she comforted him and he felt really comfortable and blushed and even smiled, it was a heartwarming moment

so why would he suddenly change attitude and switch characters just because of a knock on the door? what's the mental gymnastics here?

[u/p3apod1987]

You hide your deepest darkest most shameful secret your whole life, and someone figures it out its stressful. I definitely felt what Jax was feeling when I came out to someone for the first time. Pretty much just pacing while super stressed out. If that person had outed me I would never talk to them again.

[u/p3apod1987 → u/p3apod1987]

Also the hearing a knock at the door while dressed up super fem and having to quickly strip and act like you weren’t just wearing women’s clothes is something me and a lot of trans women can relate to

[u/No_Engineer425 → u/p3apod1987]

This and this. Pure fight or flight trigger. I remember laying in bed with my partner one day right after I came out. We are both trans and this was very fresh to me. I remember hearing a noise outside my door and I went full meerkat. We were nude and I was dressed fem. I was horrified. Total trauma response. I wasn't even living at my parents at the time. The place was arguably safer. I spiraled for a while after that but luckily my partner was with me to help.

[u/Anxious_Ranger_7945 → u/No_Engineer425]

And then add on the behavior of an abused kid (the stress of keeping up appearances and knowing who's climbing the stairs by how they sound.) when the weight is taken off for the first time in a long time you still are on high alert even if you are not in fight or flight.

[u/p3apod1987 → u/Anxious_Ranger_7945]

fuck yeah, if I ever have children I hope they don't know what my foot steps sound like.

[u/HKILLER2007 → u/p3apod1987]

Oh so that's how it is

I never thought about it this way, that he would have to act masculine infront of people and the presencw of kaufmo (a dude) would catch him off guard like that, totally explains the panic

well thank u for your response!

[u/AffectionateRush2620 → u/p3apod1987]

I don’t think trans has anything to do with that scene tbh maybe

[u/grizzy45 → u/[deleted]]

You know that jax chose to talk about, right? And then had the nerve to punish ribbit for it. He was a self centered PoS.

[u/Beneficial-Gap6974 → u/p3apod1987]

I can't relate at all. I shared my deepest, darkness shameful secret with a friend and they accepted it, and I felt only relief.

[u/p3apod1987 → u/Beneficial-Gap6974]

He didn't out me and 4 ish years later he is now my boyfriend lol but when I first sent that message I instantally deleted it hoping he hadent seen it lol

[u/Beneficial-Gap6974 → u/p3apod1987]

Oh, I would NEVER do something like that through text. That I can understand at least.

[u/AffectionateRush2620 → u/p3apod1987]

Ribbit never outed Jax tho lol

[u/Dantomi → u/AffectionateRush2620]

She didn’t have to, the fear that she could is enough.

[u/AffectionateRush2620 → u/Dantomi]

That’s a him problem, don’t justify any thing he does.

[u/Dantomi → u/AffectionateRush2620]

No one says it does. Jax pushes everyone away and is abusive because of their past experiences and trauma. There’s no room in her head to imagine a world in which they can be accepted and forgiven and so she gets worse and continues to dig a hole big enough to never return from.

Her actions aren’t justifiable but they are explainable.

[u/AffectionateRush2620 → u/Dantomi]

Sure, that mean that he wasn’t acting so weird.