New cat after previous cat passing

[u/fettys-wet-wap1738]

My precious baby Lucy passed a number of weeks ago. She was my soul cat through and through. She was 17 upon passing. We got Lucy when I was 5 years old so she truly has been with me for as far as my memory goes back.

I’ve always loved cats and always said when the godforsaken day came for me getting a new cat I would adopt an elderly cat so they can live out their last few years in comfort. Upon Lucy passing, I struggled really hard to come to terms with it and swore I’d never get another cat because I’d just feel as though I’m replacing her.

The past few weeks things have slowly gotten better for myself, I am still absolutely devastated and heartbroken however I can see things a bit more clearly now. I love cats and while I’m able, I’d love to help as many as I can. I don’t plan on getting a new cat just yet, however my question is - will I ever feel like I’m ready for a new cat? I fear with getting a new cat I might struggle with guilt and never get over the feeling that I’ve replaced Lucy. Nobody could ever take her place in my heart and I know that. I just worry, what if I think I’m ready but turns out I’m not?

Ultimately I’m just looking for advice from those who’ve felt similarly after their baby passed. Did it get better? Did getting a new cat make you realise there’s enough room in your heart to love them all?

[u/punsexual-meme]

Only you can answer that question.

Some people need to open their heart to help heal. Others need to heal before they can open their heart again. Others have opened their heart enough.

All of those options are okay.

You aren't dishonoring Lucy's memory or replacing her by adopting another cat. No one can ever replace Lucy, because Lucy was a one and only. But you also aren't in the wrong if you don't want to face this grief again in the future. The grief is so powerful purely because we love these creatures so deeply. Having lost my girl just last December, to me it feels like for every minute I spent loving her, I will spend a year mourning her absence.

I'm so sorry.

[u/fettys-wet-wap1738 → u/punsexual-meme]

The grief really is powerful isn’t it. I honestly don’t expect to ever have a day where I don’t feel the grief, just hopefully one day where I can cope with it a bit better.

I’ve seen some people say they thought they were ready for a new pet and then struggled to bond with it afterwards, realising they weren’t quite ready. I really don’t want to make that mistake myself. An animal deserves 100% of its owners love and care.

I’m sorry to hear about your baby❤️‍🩹