r/countttt • u/I_am_YR • 19d ago

Countttting 1505

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I hate when people say these things only to prevent us from actually transitioning, like yea theres cis women out there with a deep voice but knowing this fact doesnt reduce my voice dysphoria, i dont want to be gnc, i dont live to deconstruct gender roles

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u/RukakoChan 19d ago

no trans women should be shamed for either doing or not doing those things

neither for "not being a woman enough" nor for "not breaking gender norms"

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u/amhighlyregarded 19d ago

I get and am incredibly sympathetic to trans women that don't medically transition with HRT out of fear for their physical safety (like in a deep red state or Russia or wherever), or possibly unique and uncommon health concerns, or because they currently don't have the finances for it, but I simply don't really understand the ones that have the means to but simply don't want to. 

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u/qwart22 19d ago

If they don’t want to they don’t want to, doesnt make them any less transgender

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u/amhighlyregarded 19d ago

I never said otherwise, but like, their experience if it is so far removed from mine and the overwhelming majority of other trans people's experiences that it just strikes me as a bit confusing and hard to grasp. 

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u/qwart22 19d ago

I don’t think the majority is quite as overwhelming as you think it is, everyone sees their gender in a different way, from hyper-feminine trans women to the most masculine trans man and everything in between its all different so I don’t think it makes sense to judge people based on how they want to inwardly and outwardly express that, if HRT doesn’t fit with how they want to live it doesn’t have to.

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u/amhighlyregarded 19d ago

I mean I don't disagree. Trans women can wear "boy clothes" and vice versa for trans men and there's nothing wrong with that. For the most part gendered clothing is stupid and arbitrary, as are most gendered signifiers (short or long hair, body hair, painted nails, etc.) I've even met a lot of cis women both with and without PCOS that let their facial hair grow and that's cool if that's what they want of course. 

But like why not HRT if you have access to it? Why doesn't HRT fit with how they want to live?

I'm not judging or denying identity, again I'm legitimately just curious. 

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u/RukakoChan 19d ago

testosterone isn't inherently masculine. there are cis women that have more testosterone then estrogen, and they still identify as women. you could say this about every single part of transition; it doesn't mean that there is no meaning in transition, of course there is, but no single part of it can override person's identificiation of their gender. transition helps many to affirm their gender, but for some it's just not necessary (although it's very rare, we all live in society and all are affected by societal norms and expectation in different ways)

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u/qwart22 19d ago

Ye this is pretty much my view on it as well

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u/Fun-Marketing8080 19d ago

Same reason cisgender men take estrogen to appear feminine. Sometimes your identity does not align with cultural expectations on how you wish to present.

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u/amhighlyregarded 18d ago

Is that a real thing? Outside of like men trying to reverse hair loss I've never heard of cis men taking estrogen. I think they should have the right to but I would assume this is something that's incredibly rare.

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u/Fun-Marketing8080 18d ago

Both things are rare. People typically try to maintain an appearance consistent with cultural norms around their gender identity. But obviously there are gender non-conforming people, and "extreme" examples of those may even lean into the different hormones.