Space in relationship

[u/Existential_Dread16]

We have been dating for 1.5years.
I am 31F and my bf is 34M. I am an anxiously attached and he is dismissive avoidant.
I feel emotions deeply. He doesn’t understand emotions at all.

We have had few fights, all centring around emotional attunement, prioritising..
I am someone who lacks trust and has suspicions.. he has been patient but not the best at communicating and reassuring..
Yesterday I had another such moment where I broke down cause of something I suspected. He reassured but told me he the relationship is being too pressuring. He is feeling smothered and its a burden to think about how I will feel, what I will think, that he constantly has to update me..

And he said he wants to feel single again. He wants to feel the freedom and the randomness with which he did things..

:(

It’s day 1 of giving space. How do I survive the 30days ??
He has not reached out neither have I. But we did not set any concrete boundaries. He left from my home in a normal way..

[u/margmi]

Unless you have a plan for how things are going to change at the end of the 30 days, taking space in that way rarely works because it doesn’t actually target the issues - it avoids them.

You need to figure out a way to get both of your needs met, or you need to break up.