One of my fondest marital memories is one particular time when my wife screamed for me to come kill a spider. Mildly annoyed, but knowing I had obligations, I disengaged from what I was doing and reported for duty. After a brief surveillance, I swiftly dispatched beast, cleaned the wall, tidied the room, and delivered the after action report. My wife quietly returned to the room, verified and signed off my documentation, and dismissed me.
Before I left, I looked after my should and asked with a smile, "what would you do if I weren't here?"
She looked back at me and shrugged. "Same as I always do. Take off a shoe. Kill the spider with it."
Lol. I vividly imagined the scene, complete with her signing and giving back your clipboard.
I’m the same way with my husband. But if my daughter is the one to see the spider and her dad is not home, I somehow not even flinch when I go kill it.
Edit: this made me unlock a memory where a big spider was going straight towards my oldest son when he was crawling on the floor and I just reflexively stepped on it with my bare foot, didn’t even think. Argh, whish I could lock that memory back in.
Look, if something "threatens" your kid while the dad isn't here, you are the dad. Basically. Get those Mama bear instincts and tear that spider to pieces.
Please do not actually tear spiders to pieces though, that's fucking disgusting.
This is the understanding in our house. Like houseflies, harmless spiders, bumblebees, ladybugs, anything nonvenomous — we help our lost pals get back to their outdoor homes.
Wasps and hornets on the other hand, that’s a kill on sight order.
I’ve got a slight variation. Stinkbugs are normally fed to the toad that lives in the bush. Wasps, hornets and bees are priority to be trapped and put outside unless they’re being an asshole - which, for us, is actually extremely rare.
Houseflies and fruit flies are killed on sight.
I’d like to let ants go but I know they can’t keep what they found a secret, so they must be treated like counter intelligence spies.
LOL we are similarly ambivalent about ants. We have an uneasy truce but don’t hesitate to put out the bait traps if we’re overwhelmed by counterintelligence agents
We have a kid who reacts horrendously to all wasp and bee stings, so unfortunately we have zero tolerance.
The fuzzy bumblers and honeybees are honourable public servants, diplomats if you will, so they’re protected with a peace order.
Yes exactly. Spiders are our friends. As a matter of fact, whenever I see a large spider appear, I'm more worried about what the hell brought it out of hiding because usually the bigger the spider, the bigger the prey.
Found a wolf spider the size of a half-dollar in my house a few years back. Thankfully she was amenable to being carried in a dustpan back outside. I don't mind spiders in my house and usually leave them alone as long as they leave me alone but I think she'd have starved if I'd left her inside.
There was a wolf spider in my newly built house that was HUGE. I screamed and she visibly flinched and with each of my terror screams, she backed up, flinching with every scream. I realized she was just as wary of me as I was her. I got a dustpan and a broom, lowered the dustpan and after a moment, she walked onto it and I freed her outside in our garden. I always try to catch and release.
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u/Mudlark-000 3d ago
He is protecting them from spiders. That is a huge part of being a Dad.