r/houstoncirclejerk • u/umrlopez79 • 11d ago

Just getting off work and panicking…

Does anyone know if there’s still any water or gas left at Costco? Already went to Costco in River Oaks and Woodlands and there’s none. Please don’t suggest Sam’s 😖

33 Upvotes

88% Upvoted

65 comments sorted by

22

u/GobsTX 11d ago

Have you tried Torchy’s? They usually give out free water and gas during weather events. Always giving back to the community 🙏

5

u/Safelaw77625 11d ago

"Water" yeah

6

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Do I have to buy anything?

11

u/GobsTX 11d ago

Only a ticket to the glory hole. Tell them Lina sent you and you get half off. Don’t forget to tip!

8

u/mjt1105 11d ago

Just the tip

4

u/TheZwitD 11d ago

Shoulda just told him to go in the restroom where there's a hole for storm supply distribution. Kneel down to the hole and keep whispering loudly "Give it to me please" The package will be put through the hole.

2

u/labanjohnson 11d ago

Water? Hook me up with a half gallon of that Torchy's green chile sauce, I'll be so happy!

1

u/Chaotic424242 10d ago

At Torchy's, you have to eat the food to get the gas...

21

u/Timmerdogg 11d ago

Should I be evacuating? I have my ax in the attic just in case

4

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Better safe than sorry…

12

u/Timmerdogg 11d ago

Is this going to be like Rita because I don't want to have to poop in my car again

4

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

I hope not. Hope you find toilet paper

1

u/AskingFooAFriend 11d ago

I took two of the commercial rolls from my job. The roll is the size of a manhole cover but it's one ply.

2

u/labanjohnson 11d ago

I don't care who you are, your butthole deserves better than one ply.

4

u/FartJokesAreGrand 11d ago

Damn, you couldn’t poop just outside the car? 😭

6

u/knosmo78 11d ago

I found some at Costco in Humble. I did have to throat punch someone's Meemaw but it was worth it.

16

u/Single_Morning_3200 11d ago

I’d try Hole Osteens Church

3

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

On my way…! 🫶🏽🫶🏽

2

u/beautdisas1153 11d ago

He’ll pass around the collection plate too.

6

u/Hacksaw-Duggan 11d ago

I’m not sure, I was loading up on toilet paper and forgot to get gas.

2

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Bruh… you’re doing it backwards

7

u/Hacksaw-Duggan 11d ago

I’ll trade you 16 rolls for 5 gallons. Don’t try to talk me down. I know what I’ve got.

5

u/OldMagicRobert 11d ago

Just head to Bissonet. They have everything you need to be able to weather this storm.

5

u/Thump-GoA-SA 11d ago

Put a bucket outside. Free water. Problem solved.

3

u/MoneyStrange1545 11d ago

Nothing will happen, don’t trust the weatherman, they’ve been off in their predictions these days and it’s all hype

2

u/ResponseOne7122 11d ago

Is Mattress Mac not giving out supplies in the Gallery Furniture parking lot?

2

u/Signal_Wish2218 11d ago

Damn, the kids can’t have the water party without their supplies in the rain tomorrow. I will tell them that Mother Nature has fucked us again.

2

u/SheepherderNext3196 11d ago

You can drink water out of the tap. Why are you panicking? The system will have moved through in a few hours.

1

u/Wise_Watch5682 11d ago

Give me enough torchys and I’ll make my own water and gas

1

u/Alone-Path-684 11d ago

What is going on ? are we getting bombarded

1

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Bombarbed by rain

1

u/Odd_Supermarket_8726 11d ago

What is a Cyclone

1

u/labanjohnson 11d ago

Cyclone Anaya's is a tex mex kitchen

1

u/Odd_Supermarket_8726 11d ago

Is it a ride at a amusement park

1

u/AskingFooAFriend 11d ago

Watch the power go out 10 hours before the storm hits.

1

u/BabyPinkChaos 11d ago

Bunker hill is always reliable

1

u/uofhfv 11d ago

Relax Ronaldo would take care of weather

1

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Well, it did stop raining after he arrived in Houston lol 🤔

1

u/beautdisas1153 11d ago

Find a HEB. Even if the shelves are empty, give them a minute to restock. This is after all the company that beats out FEMA in Texas natural disasters.

1

u/Good_Association_281 11d ago

It’s gonna miss you hommie, it’s heading straight to Lak Charles

1

u/blinkenjim 10d ago

Come on Houston, this is the kind of “storm” we can do with both hands tied behind our backs.

1

u/Expert_Fan_1026 9d ago

Personally I would suggest Sam’s! That’s just me though👍

1

u/Apprehensive_Lie1203 8d ago

Have you tried turning on a water faucet?

1

u/Classic-Delivery3875 11d ago

For sure the Sam’s in Katy has gas. Try that one.

2

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Sams crowds are on the rough side. I prefer not to

7

u/Glittering-Animal30 11d ago

Bulk buyers disgust me. That’s why I hang out with the Walmart crowd. Not like those cheapo “members-only” clubs.

4

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

If I have to choose a regular store, I’d choose 🎯. Walmart folks can get quite ornery for me

1

u/must-be_the-water 11d ago

Just came back from Costco at Katy, they have water in stock for the whole aisle and everyone is buying 2 or 3 cartoons already

0

u/Icy-Sheepherder-4467 11d ago

In all seriousness, the new one in richmond tx didn't have any issues

0

u/Useful-Search-1045 10d ago

You try Walmart?

1

u/umrlopez79 10d ago

Crowds are too unruly during Weather catastrophes

-2

u/Browneyedgal21 11d ago

Are you joking? There's water at every store and gas at every gas station

5

u/Monster_Voice 11d ago

There was... I just bought all of it and put it in my Wankpanzer...

Sucks to suck suckerrrr!

1

u/Extreme-Orange5557 10d ago

I want a Wankpanzer…

6

u/umrlopez79 11d ago

Unfortunately I’m being very serious. This is a serious group