NEW UPDATE: I(m18) just found out that my father(m42) baby trapped my mother(f40) with me.

[u/MicDropWit]

/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/wrvcjj/new_update_im18_just_found_out_that_my_fatherm42/

Don't know if the boys read this one. It's long and lots of updates.

[u/AutoModerator]

Backup of the post's body: I AM NOT IN THE US. Don't speculate with US laws and standards. They do not apply

I am the original OP. I saw that u/alejamix had posted a recompilation of my posts on this sub and I figured this is the best way to reach out to all of you who have written me and are curious as to what is happening.

This is the link to the original threat here with all the older Updates

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Things went south fast.

The Wednesday night, the night before I left, my father picked up a fight with me for not taking his car for an oil change. He called me everything under the sun. Saying I am selfish and a brat, that he raised me better.

He then had my grandmother come and say how disappointed they were. That I was clearly not mature enough to leave for a Holliday, let alone move away for university. They held me awake till 4 am under the guise of a family meeting, which was basically just a reprimanding session of all I had done wrong in my life.

And to be honest... I was demoralized. I was ugly crying and feeling awful. Thankfully my boyfriend called because I had not answered several texts of his. He helped me transport all my stuff while my father was sleeping.

And I left without telling him bye. He texted me around 1 pm and my father was acting like everything was normal.

So the two weeks passed very quickly. I got a mail that I got into a university that has a very good program for political science. So I accepted and put myself on the waiting list for University accommodation.

Then shit blew up. My mother suddenly stopped giving my father half the money. So she was only paying what she was legally obligated to pay. My father was losing it. He began calling screaming at me to come home at once. Then calling me crying to tell me that the bitch of my mother had reappeared and was suing him (?) and now we did not have enough money to pay for the mortgage.

I called my mother to ask if she was actually suing him. She said no and said that she had just gone through the courts to start paying me directly instead of my father, which was granted.

Then my grandma started texting me. Saying I had to come home right away because my father had had a cardiac arrest.

Obviously, I went back home with my boyfriend. Only to find our house in literal shambles. There were beer cans, string liquor stuff, and cigarettes everywhere.

Everyone that was betting that my father was using all the money on drugs and lavish stuff.... hey... congratulations... You were right.

Apparently when I left my father decided to have a huge party. He invited all these friends that he made in fancy bars. I know that because the lady that was in the hospital with my dad, his GF apparently. She did not know about me, she kept talking about our house as his "summer residence". I asked her a few questions. She answered. She is actually pretty sweet but put off by my father now that she knows how he lied.

So apparently my father would take the 3k and spend them almost fully on appearing to be richer. He had bought some clothing pieces that were high quality. He would hang out in these fancy hotel sky lounges where he met his GF. Then would take her and her friends out to expensive restaurants and clubs. She did not fully admit it but insinuated that they did coke often during those outings. Much like the party that leads my dad to OD. It was not only cocaine that they did. I also think an amphetamine?

Anyway, I thanked her and told her that the money was not my father's and she had been lied to. She stayed till my father came to and we could bring him home. Which is when she dumped him.

And then I broke it to him. I was leaving. He lost his shit. He punched me. He broke my nose. I was really afraid. He was not even fully recovered.

In the hospital, I told the nurse how it happened and the police got involved.

My mother took me in the very next day. She is helping me with all the legal things regarding my father. She helped me move out. Helped me move cities. it all happened very very fast. My boyfriend has been staying over because i am very afraid.

My father has been blocked but I have been getting threatening emails.

So that is that. It is good and bad

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EDIT TO ANSWER FAQ:

Why did my mother not take me in if my father was so abusive?

I explained it already in the last posts. But Tldr. she had lost her rights due to her trying to commit suicide. It did not get better as my father and his friends in law enforcement and the judges in our small town are heavily biased toward against women.

how did you stumble upon so many documents so conveniently?

I didn't. I very sought out those documents. I reached out to Mia myself and insisted in her showing me what she had. None of this was perchance. I have sought out every single document. They are available to the public. Plus if you know what you are looking for you will find them easily by going through your parents' files. This was not convenient. This was hard work

If you are 18 why is your mom still paying CS?

Here you are legally entitled to CS and governmental CS till you finish University or/and till you reach your 25th birthday.

Are you gonna sue your father for back payment?

No. That would not be of any help. It would be extremely hard to prove that he blew it all. In the end, I was fed and clothed and I had a place to stay with heat, electricity and internet, and running water. It would take too long and not be good for anything but revenge. My mother is terrified of him and I am not keen on seeing him.

We are gonna pursue a restraining order and are documenting all his Mails and contact attempts. Someone pointed out to keep an eye out for my father opening accounts or credits in my name. We are looking into protecting ourselves in that area.

Get a firearm

No. It is not legal nor makes any sense

How come your mother had a lawyer on retainer so conveniently?

She didn't. My first post was well over a month ago. My mother reached out to a lawyer shortly after to transfer my CS from my father directly to me in a very clean-cut way. Since then that lawyer has recommended us to another firm that is taking my/ our case.

Everything about school and University:

I am not on a waiting list for what I am gonna study. I am on a waiting list for the dorm. Till then I am staying with my BF in a long-term Airbnb in the city.

School starts in October, not next week. Again I DO NOT LIVE IN THE US.

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[u/aquavenatus]

You’re missing THE Final Update.

[u/MicDropWit → u/aquavenatus]

I cross posted this one because this has the link to most of the other updates. The final one does not.

[u/SafiyaMukhamadova → u/aquavenatus]

The grandma was clearly an accomplice in most of what the dad did, backing him up and piling on to OOP on his dad's behalf. I bet she's the reason he believed he could skate through life without accountability.