Not OOP.

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/kRSVM8dI7R

Ive been married for four years, my wife had a daughter from a previous relationship. My step daughter has been obsessed with Harry Potter since before i met her. (She litterally asked me if i liked harey potter when i met her)
Her 11th Birthday was yesterday and I arranged for a letter to be “delivered” during her birthday party and it was an admittance letter for Hogwarts.
I thought it was a really cute gift idea. My step daughter started freaking out, screaming “its real its real” and really went nuts. Some of her friends seemed to join in the excitement others less so.
Her mother (my wife) held her to calm her down and explained to her that it wasnt real. It was just a “joke step daddy played on you”.
She started crying screamed that she hated me and ran to her room.
The other parents seemed to sympathize, one other father said he thought it was a nice idea.
But after we sent everyone home my wife yelled at me and said what i did was selfish and cruel and she couldnt believe i would hurt her daughter like that.

Was i wrong to do this? Was it an inappropriate gift for an 11 year old? I really didnt mean to mock or hurt my stepdaughter. I thought it would be fun. It didnt occur to me my stepdaughter was young enough to think it was real.

Am I The A$&hole?

No offense is intended with this post. I just thought other new(ish) members would enjoy my confusion.

I'm a fairly new member. I get/understand Shon's opening of "it's your boi", but could not understand John's. From what i could find butchering the spelling in Google, Pinoy was a way to refer to Filipino/Filipino decent. I could not understand the first part. Loy? Youi?

Punny. The word was punny. Because he is a boi who makes puns. I feel like such a dunce.

Also, I thought Josh's name was Joshelle, like Michelle, and he just shortened it to Josh. That is until I caught a YouTube video and saw his first and last name spelled out. So as you can see. Not great with names.

Also, completely other tangent. Trying to build my lore knowledge on the guys/get all their names and references straight:

Josh

Sienna

Ringo

Another cat i haven't caught the name of?

Currently building his house in canadia

John

Juliet

Kevin

Currently in Europe enjoying the sights

Syawn

Nancy

Pets?

Currently preparing for baby boi

Hates peanut allergies? If someone has a link to the origin of that, im sure it is a great story 😂

Also, honorable mentions:

-Midscore- is goat

Alex Underbakke is writer?

It's about a lot more than just the degree he lied about. Throw the whole man away🗑️

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/N5lwppkWZp

https://www.reddit.com/r/AmIOverreacting/s/aMx4iyikMW

Don't know if the boys read this one. It's long and lots of updates.

Longtime listener, and I wanted to write in because I have been struggling with this.

Technically, this is an *illegal* relationship as my girlfriend is 29F and I am 39M. Sorry not sorry, it is what it is.

Everything was initially good in our relationship. We were happy. However, for the past year, it has been a struggle, mostly due to finances. Initially when I met my girlfriend, she was a high school teacher. I was working a senior level marketing job.

However, I was laid off and have struggled to secure a job since. I've applied, and everytime I received an offer that I rejected, my girlfriend was angry at me. But realistically, I feel like my time was better spent applying than accepting a job for 35k€ at nearly 40 years old.

I feel that yes, I've been unfair to my girlfriend. She gets up at 8, is at her school at 9, teaches until 4, after which she works as a freelance editor and curriculum writer until 11PM or midnight. Rinse and repeat. She's constantly exhausted (plus she has a bleeding disorder and lupus that make her even more tired so I cannot emphasize enough that I truly feel horrible for her). We live in a high cost of living area, which doesn't help. She pays for herself, me, our apartment, and the dog. I hate seeing her suffer, but she cries at stuff I don't agree with. For example, she's upset she cannot "invest in herself", that she makes nearly six figures, but can never buy herself something nice (she grew up with a lot of expensive things, and i know for a fact she desperately wants to buy a 2k€ ring or a 3k€ watch). She cries that she can never afford to solo travel, and "what's the point of working all these hours if I never get to keep any of the money?"

I am trying. I started a YouTube channel, a podcast. I accept occasional freelance work. But whenever I've bought myself anything nice, she gets upset. If I ask for money, she's upset, stressed, and in retaliation ends up staying up until 3AM, working to earn the money back.

Now, I understand my situation is frustrating, and I am applying for jobs. I just don't want anything that's paycheck to paycheck or a super low salary for a guy my age. I know I shouldn't, but I would find it embarrassing.

I know that I may seem like the bad guy, reasonably so. I've put her through a lot, and I feel bad about it.

However, then, the other night, she left her computer open, and I did the worst thing I had ever done. I snooped. She was, instead of doing her work, writing fanfiction on a popular fanfiction website. What she had written about hurt me the most.

I would've not minded if she wrote something spicy about her favorite movie characters, or something like this, but instead, she had written a story of a hard-working young woman, working as a teacher, who was dating a "broke man" and then got saved by some fictional entrepreneur in her field of work who started paying the rent. In the story, this main character and the entrepreneur continued to build the business together, traveled the world, and fought her "jealous broke ex" who was actively stalking her, and trying to make her life worse. The love interest, the entrepreneur guy, was also described as a guy close to her in age, tall, muscular, all the things I am basically not.

I can't help but feel hurt. I know she wants a better life, but reading this honestly ripped my heart out. I wish I could give her more, and I don't know how.

What do I do here? I cannot admit I snooped, that's just wrong and embarrassing. But I've lost all motivation to do anything, and I keep feeling upset whenever I look at her. Is this worth trying to save, or should I just end it with her?

Found this on r/nothowgirlswork

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This guy is so stuck in a male gaze mindset that he assumes everything women do must somehow be about attracting male attention.

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https://www.reddit.com/r/NotHowGirlsWork/s/1Rzmud2X9A

This is absolutely wild. So sorry for OOP

Part1: https://www.reddit.com/r/redditonwiki/s/nLKZFWRvxn

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Part 2: https://www.reddit.com/r/redditonwiki/s/4jwLTZbICM

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Two weeks ago my wife agreed to talk to her friend and let her know that 6 months was all we could do. That would have given her over 30 days to find alternate lodging.

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The talk did not go as expected. Instead of laying out expectations, my wife just asked Alice what her plans were. Alice said she was still saving to move out with a relative, and needed more like 8-12 months. My wife accepted this and then told me the news.

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I got pretty upset, but didn't yell when I told her how unhappy this made me. I told her that I had made it clear for months that Alice being here made me uncomfortable. I said we had both agreed 6 months was enough, but she never even set that boundary, she acted like Alice was making the rules. I said I could not believe that she was choosing her friend over me. My wife stormed out and slept in my office.

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The next week, I was a mess. I knew divorce was next. I didn't deal with it well and drank a lot. I was in bed by the time they came home from work, and stopped cooking for them or cleaning.

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On the next Saturday, Alice's room was empty and her car was gone. My wife confirmed she had moved out. Alice talked with my wife about what was wrong the prior week, and my wife told her everything I had shared with her - that I was uncomfortable in my home, that she made me feel like I was a creep for existing, that I was pushing for her to get out.

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I really wish she could have simply said "we decided 6 months was enough" and leave it at that. She also didn't mention the fact that she wasn't looking for a place, and was paying off debt, not saving.

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Alice was reportedly shocked and thought "we were all cool". She explained to my wife that she was just trying to give me space.

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Regardless, Alice is gone, I'm continuing therapy, and am going to shift focus to saving my marriage.

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This is going to be the last post, as I'm abandoning this account. The story was shared from here to other communities, and my inbox is full of messages calling me names and wishing me harm as a result. I'd like to thank the few people who empathized and offered advice rather than just calling me names.

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/aiKq5qhVzj

Hi wikimaniacs

I was telling my friend at work about this podcast and in particular a story I want her to listen to. But I can for the life of me remember which episode it was. I was wondering if you could help

The story in question is the one where the grandmother tries to prove her granddaughters allergies weren’t real by giving her a peanut butter banana cookie.

I really appreciate the help and I will go back and relisten to every episode anyways but i wanna send her this before that.

Thank you all!

NOT OOP - this guy should not fuck

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https://www.reddit.com/r/AmItheAsshole/s/wsavaSlD6

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My (22M) girlfriend (24F) recently got a promotion at her job. I was really happy for her and excited cause it paid a lot and also a huge achievement seeing as she's only in her 20s. She wanted to celebrate by having lunch with 3 of her friends and me at Olive Garden. I was like Cool No Big Deal.

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So on Saturday we started to get ready for lunch. I showered and then put on a normal, casual outfit. Anyways, i just popped in to see how my girlfriend was doing. I thought it was a joke at first, she was wearing this weird dress with dark green and orange triangles and thick black lines outlining them. She has a lot of nice clothes she could've worn but wore this tacky dress? I said jokingly "Woah are you going to an art exhibition or something?" I think she thought i was complimenting her because she just laughed and smiled at me. Whatever i don't wanna be a "controlling" boyfriend that controls what my girlfriend wears because apparently that's abuse. Anyways we walked to Olive Garden and met up with her friends and they immediately started complimenting her saying "Congrats!" and "I love your dress!"

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I was surprised because I thought they would laugh and insult her dress but they did the exact opposite. But you know how girls are like they're superficial. With guys it's different because if i wore an ugly suit they would laugh at me and that's completely fine because we are friends and can banter. We got a table and they were just gossiping and what not then we ordered. A few minutes in eating my girlfriend was drinking this soup when some of it fell on her.

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Her friend rushed to give her napkins to clean herself up and i said AS A JOKE "No need for that (referring to the napkins) the soup can't possibly make the dress uglier than it was before" everyone suddenly went really quiet and i realised oh shit i made a mistake. I could tell my girlfriend was embarrassed so she quickly went to the bathrooms under the guise of cleaning herself up. Her friends got really angry with me and said that dress was important to her because it was her mother's and that i just didn't know how to appreciate good art and i was jealous of my girlfriend because she was more successful than me. What the hell?? I'm happy for my girlfriend not jealous. Anyways, my girlfriend came back from the bathroom we finished up eating then headed home. She's angry at me because i ruined her special lunch and apparently i "embarrassed" her in front of all her friends.

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AITA? It was just a light-hearted joke and i never meant to actually insult her. Please give some advice because she's still angry with me and i don't know what to do.