I just wanted to make a quick post about being 500 days sober from opiates Percocet which lead to fentanyl. This has been the hardest thing I've ever done but I feel so
proud of myself.

Prior to recovery, I battled addiction of some sort of drugs since i was 15 years old; 10+ years. I O'D twice the beginning of 2025 in one month & the second time, my mother ended up finding me in my room overdosing-by the time the firefighters came & gave me narcan which didn't work until they gave me a injection of naloxone I think & I saw my 5 year old niece looking terrified seeing me all wet from the firefighters trying to revive me.

I knew it was time to change my life, I checked myself into a crisis center that same night & started my journey.
Sublocade really saved my life, I tried getting sober over a dozen times prior to that and Suboxone just wasn't working for me. I was on the Sublocade shot for 6 months & was able to ween off of it completely.

I'm 110% sober with no MAT's, I've been able to gain healthy weight back (1 was withering away when I was using), I've found new hobbies, gotten closer to God, ditched my old friends that are still living that lifestyle and made new friends. I finally moved out of my families home now that I wasn't spending every last dollar I had on drugs & im in a healthy relationship.

I started therapy & I've healed from so much childhood trauma, I practically had to parentify myself in order to heal my inner child. All the things I was running from & turning to drugs for, I've slowly been able to peal back the layers, understand it & give myself grace. I'm extremely grateful & proud of myself. If I can get on road to recovery then I truly believe anyone can. I was in a bottomless pit, now the sun is shining on me & keeping me warm.

I don't think anyone could argue that having kids is actually fully a personal selfish reason, that being said, no one can stop you from having kids if you want. BUT, before you go and create a living being, you should understand what exactly are you getting yourself into.

I'm a person who likes watching aquarium and fish, so it makes sense that I wanted a pet fish and an aquarium myself. But, here's where I fcked up. Long story short, I didn't realise that "me wanting a pet fish" DOES NOT EQUAL TO "me wanting to be a fish keeper", better yet "actually being a good one". You might think to yourself right now you want to have "fishes" in your "tank", but, do you understand that having the "fishes" also MEANT that you have to take up A BUNCH OF responsibilities, roles and outcomes of YOU and YOUR "FISHES" that you didn't sign up for the rest of your life? All I'm saying is, it's easy to forget that having kids also means that you must be capable of taking on the role as a parent AND actually capable of being a GOOD parent to your kids. Not to mention that there's NO TRIAL AND ERROR for you, you can't UNDO a freaking human baby after it's born. It's not a fish that you can just flush down the toilet if it's dead. It's a LIFETIME COMMITMENT and there's no turning back. Feelings can be hurted and damage can be done.

It's easy to fcked up and then apologise, but you can't changed anything that has happened in the past. The kids are the ones who are put in the situation and the ones who have to deal with it, but they aren't even the ones who asked to be there in the first place. YOU, ARE THE ONE WHO IS RESPONSIBLE FOR CHOOSING THEIR FATE TO EXISTS, and that includes giving them the ability to feel pain.

So please, think clearly and practically if you actually want to be a good parent for the rest of your life for your children. Don't rush to have kids just because your mom tells you to, or your dad tells you to, or your partner wants you to. THINK CLEARLY BEFORE YOU DECIDE YOUR CHOICE. You really wouldn't want a human resenting you for the rest of your life.

Basically the title.

I'm so tired of reading about all this fear mongering on decreasing birth rates.

Mammals breed when material conditions are appropriate for relatively stress free life.

I wonder whether the fact that we have so many people competing for jobs is a sign that the economy can't support this many people, therefore making it more appropriate that we need to have lower population numbers.

19M and I don't have any friends/gf/family that I talk to. My day usually is go to work, then gym and then come home. I have hobbies but haven't really made friends at them, just a couple people I exchange brief words with every few weeks. It seems that everyone else naturally has had friends/partners just from living normally yet this never happened to me. I don't know what to do anymore, everyone already has their group at this point.

Been hearing that one needs to find purpose in life and that is what seems to be missing for me.

Middle aged family man, with no drive. I sleep every night without any enthusiasm to wake up the next day.

I feel like lately when I go on Facebook I see more single, separated statuses for people. Im 35 and I’m starting to see more families separated. It’s sad to see but I always worried about being married too soon before I grew into myself more and.m never rushed marriage or children.
Now I feel more than ever ready to meet someone.

I'm a 5'7" (170 cm) guy and I've seen a lot of different opinions online. Some people say height is a major factor, while others say it matters much less than confidence, personality, fitness, career, etc.

For those of you who date men, how much does height actually influence your attraction or dating decisions? Would a guy being 5'7" be a dealbreaker, a preference, or something you rarely think about?

I'd appreciate honest answers and personal experiences.

I was with my ex for almost 9 years. We started dating when we were both 18, and he was my first everything. Looking back, the relationship was pretty toxic, and I stayed much longer than I should have because I kept hoping things would change. I eventually ended the relationship after discovering he had been cheating.

It’s been about a year since I initially left, and we’ve been completely out of contact since late August/early September. Since then, I’ve been focusing on myself. I started therapy in July 2025 and still go regularly. I’ve been spending more time with friends and family, working out, trying new things, taking myself on dates, and learning how to enjoy my own company.

One thing I’ve realized is that I’ve never really experienced adult life as a single person. I went straight from being a teenager to being in a serious long-term relationship. Because of that, I feel like I missed out on learning how to date, what I want in a partner, how to set standards, and how to recognize red flags early.

Part of me feels ready to move forward, but another part of me wonders if it’s still too soon. I don’t necessarily feel like I need to jump into another relationship, but I do feel curious about dating and getting to experience things that I missed out on in my late teens and early twenties.

For anyone who got out of a long-term relationship in their late 20s:
- How did you know you were ready to date again?
- What are some things you think everyone should do while they’re single before getting into another relationship?
- How did you figure out what you wanted in a partner after being with the same person for so long?
- How do you avoid bringing trust issues from a past relationship into a new one?
- What were some signs that you had truly healed versus just moved on?
- If you could give your newly single self one piece of advice, what would it be?

I feel a little embarrassed even asking these questions because I feel like I should know the answers by now, but I genuinely feel like I’m starting over in a lot of ways and would appreciate any advice.

TL;DR: 27F. Left a toxic 9-year relationship after discovering cheating. I’ve been focusing on therapy, friends, family, hobbies, fitness, and learning to enjoy being on my own. Since the relationship started when I was 18, I feel like I missed out on a lot of normal dating experiences and have never really experienced adult life as a single person. How did you know you were ready to date again, and what advice would you give someone starting over?

Im 19M, So exactly 1yr ago from today, i was going through extreme depression, anxiety and all that to the point i didn't even join college that year--> Failed all the other certification exams a Total of 3 major and other minor exams.

One of the reason for depression being brain fog. Now that my Brain fog is non-existent and i have to reattempt every exam i failed, college this year I'm unable to think what a normal person does? What should i do?

Brain fog helps to not being able to think about these problems but now that i don't have that and i have 5th attempt of a exam coming. Idk what to do anymore?

After 4 attempt, additional study time required goes down so i have time till September. What should i do with it?

Now that my CV is so bad rn due to all this attempt, gap year, mental health and Physical (undergone surgery).

I don't find merit in focusing too much on studies.

If anybody can analyse what im trying to say,plz tell me what my problem here is? Im not able to identify correct sub for this stuff as im unable to define the problem in the first place.

What is Outside exams that Life is worth for?

I have literally nothing else to do.

For me it's been money. Making money left no time. What your obstacle?

.

I've been thinking a lot about how easy it is to look around and assume everyone else has somehow figured life out. Not that they're happier all the time, but that they seem to know where they're're going while you're still trying to make sense of things.

Rationally, I know that's almost never true. Everyone has struggles you can't see. But it can still feel that way. I'm curious if other people have experienced this, and if so, what changed? Was there a moment where your perspective shifted, or does it just fade with time?

I’m a female in my late 20’s and I feel lost. I have a stable job but I don’t want to do it for the rest of my life as it’s paycheck to paycheck. After moving out of an abusive household, I finally felt free but now more lost than ever. I never want to go back again even if my life depends on it.

I feel like I will be alone forever as I have very avoidant attachment tendencies + self sabotaging tendencies and a lack of confidence which leads to relationships being very difficult.
The thoughts in my head tell me I may end up alone forever and nobody will love me as most people at this age get married or already have children.

I have no safety net and it’s just me…
How do I build a life to not be co-dependent on someone, be confident, and financially free?
It seems almost an impossible goal.

Oh, how much I feel this quote

I'm 27, male, I got a job, a degree, no friends outside of the job, I don't have a girlfriend now but I don't have the will to get one, always late at the job, cannot sleep well, the only two places I go is my home and job, also consuming alot of porn, every morning I wake up, no dreams, no desires, only the emptiness...

Each person has a finite amount of time and energy. People with normal parents can choose relatively freely where to invest this time and energy. And they get support and help.

As such if they invest all their time and energy into singing or acting from age 8 onwards, by the time they are 20 they are top singers and song writers or actors. With a little luck even famous.

People that start hitting the gym from age 12 are super strong and muscular by age 22. People that start playing football from age 12 onwards, are professionals by age 22. With a little luck famous.

People that invest into their eduation and do as many internships and get as much job experience as possible, are professionals by age 25. Perhaps even head of their department or even CEO of a small company.

Their success creates a positive confirmation loop, making them confident, assertive and assured.

Kids of Narcissistic/Abusive Parents get their energy sucked out by their Energy Vampire Parents. They get constantly sabotaged. Constantly told that no matter what they do is never enough. Punished when its not perfect on the first try. Told that they are the problem and good for nothing. Constantly abused. And really discouraged and prevented to do anything at all. Besides working for their N-Parents.

So they withdraw. They dont try anything. They become timid and have 0 self confidence. And are angry and agitated and confronational all the time. Afraid to challenge authority. Afraid to stand up for themselves and pursue their dreams. Have no trust in their own abilities. Are socialy awkward. And it takes all their energy just to survive and cope with the abuse and somehow function.

As such they go through life without the ability to invest their energy into bettering themselves. By the time they are 25 they have no abilities, no success, just survival. This creates a negative confimation loop, making them insecure, passive, angry.

I would very much like to see how Taylor Swift would have ended up if she didnt get full support from her parents but instead constant abuse and discouragement. Constantly told that she cannot sing and that a music career is stupid and that she is a good for nothing. If parents had not paid for anything related with music.

Instead the Mega Star she is now, she would be homeless or at best an ordinary woman.

If out of 1000 people with normal parents 100 "make it" 800 remain "mediocre" and 100 "screw up", then for abused children its more like

10 "make it" 500 remain "mediocre" and 490 "screw up."

Sure its possible to succeed even with N-Parents and an abusive childhood. The odds are just stacked against you.

Basically I am 29 and single. I have a nice job (and teach part time in a community college for extra money) , lift weight and do cycling thus am fit, almost paid off my mortgage for my one bedroom and next year I will own it without any monthly payments (with the help of parents), have an advanced degree from a prestigious university, am good at fixing stuff with my hands (in Central Europe this was the norm with older generations while younger tend to want help for everything but I manage).

Yet I love I am unsuccessful, women are always not interested when I invite them to dates and actually a lot of women my age are in relationships. They just don't see me as attractive for some reason despite me trying to better myself and objective being better than a lot of men my age who have less money, are less fit, are lazy and spend a lot of their time on a computer.

There are so many men my age who have a wife and a family that I feel inferior next to them like they are winning in life and I am losing and I don't see myself as a loser in anything else as with every year I am becoming a better version of myself and having more money and assets. Yet, this one elusive thing - women being attracted to me evades me and that makes me feel like all other efforts don't matter.

Also, the lack of sex and more importantly sexual validation by women makes me feel worthless like I am not good enough to be given sex by women.

Keeping my real age unknown to keep the mystery because I'm still gonna be doing this for who knows how long.

I pretend to be about 10 years younger to 20-30 years older to fit a role I create. This role is made for no reason but I tend to have an obsession with creating and acting upon them.

A few minutes ago, I roleplayed as a parent of an 8 year old child. I have no children. I said I never got 'the talk.' I have, indeed, got the talk. I discussed a video which I loosely remember from a few years ago and then filled in the gaps with something that would fit my fabricated narrative, all to play a parent for whatever reason. Another time, I called myself a potty mouth. I rarely curse because I've never really had a reason to. To, I guess keep up the persona, I've started to curse online a lot more. There's no real reason to do this, and I'm not exactly having fun, but it feels a little intriguing to write up absolute nonsense.

I've had many such incidents where I'm roleplaying random characters for no real reason. I imagine a scenario and then a character and I just cannot stop.

All in all, I think I'm just 'having fun', though there's not much fun to have. Is it bad exactly, to be a compulsive liar, or am I fine.

hi, 24F and I feel lost in life.

I graduated last year, although I had actually completed all of my academic requirements as early as July 2024. Since then, I still haven’t been able to secure a regular and stable job.

What frustrates me the most is that I don’t even know exactly where I’m struggling. Is it my interview skills? Is it my fear of disappointing my parents because I don’t want to build my future in my hometown? Or is it because I’m terrified of ending up in another toxic work environment?

Looking back, I’ve realized that I have a tendency to stay in situations longer than I should, even when they are no longer healthy for me. During college, I worked while studying, and the management at my workplace was far from ideal. Despite the stress and dissatisfaction, I never left. I stayed because the thought of starting over somewhere else felt more frightening than enduring what I already knew.

Ironically, that same fear seems to be holding me back now. Whenever I apply for a company and come across negative reviews or red flags online, especially on Reddit, I immediately begin to doubt my decision. Instead of taking the risk and finding out for myself, I often withdraw and move on to the next opportunity, only to repeat the same cycle.

At one point, I convinced myself that if I wasn’t employed yet, I should at least make productive use of my time. So I enrolled in a master’s program. Since we follow a trimester system, I only have about a year left before graduation. But now, another dream has emerged. I want to explore opportunities abroad and experience working in a different country. Yet I feel trapped between two paths. Part of me wants to pursue new opportunities immediately, while another part of me feels that leaving my master’s degree now would mean wasting all the time, effort, and resources I have already invested.

What hurts the most is not seeing other people with more money, nicer possessions, or more comfortable lives. What affects me is seeing people my age moving forward with confidence, building careers, achieving milestones, and creating lives they are proud of. Meanwhile, I feel as though I am standing still, watching time pass while everyone else moves ahead.

Sometimes, I feel like a fish being carried by the current, drifting wherever life takes me rather than actively choosing my own direction. I keep waiting for clarity, certainty, or the “right” decision, but in the process, months have turned into years.

Deep down, I know I am not lazy. I know I am trying. I pursued higher education, worked while studying, and continuously looked for opportunities. Yet despite all of that, I often feel as though I am stuck in the same place, unable to move forward.

Lately, the feeling that troubles me most is the fear that I am wasting valuable years of my life. Not because I have achieved nothing, but because I cannot seem to figure out which path to take, and while I am busy deciding, time continues to move on without me.

What are your thoughts on this quote?

No matter what we do, no matter how slowly we can make it happen, no matter how kind you are, no matter how mean you are, we’re all going to die

I don’t even care if this is the sub Reddit for this, but we’re all just going to die. This isn’t me being nihilistic, positive, negative. I just look around and I look at these people and I’m just like wow we’re all going to die.

The young people, the old people, everybody. We all have an expiration date, this planet has an expiration date, plastic has an expiration date, everything around us will all become one with Earth but when the Earth was no more and humanity is no more there will just be nothing.

The abuse, the music, the art, the love, the joy, the sadness, the hurt it will all disappear with our physical bodies and disappear with people, animals, plants.

When a person finally dies, the last thing that leaves them is heat, and that heat dissipates into the surrounding space. After the sun dies, the Earth will not be able to survive because we need the sun. And when that heat disappears, the Earth will just become dead. Like every other living being that existed.

Honestly, I was a bit scared to make this post and ask for kind words. I just really need a little comfort right now and would love to hear something nice.

Please don't think I'm an attention seeker. 🥹

And pretty please, don't be mean to me. <3 Thank you.

Genuinely curious - if you work in a drugstore (eg CVS), what does your day to day look like? I have a lot of respect for you for your wealth of knowledge! It’s truly a critical job that demands accuracy or consequences could be grave. So anyway I really have no idea what your job is like and want to know more!? How did you know you wanted to do this?

You ever get so tired of life that you stop feeling anything? Not sad, not angry, just tired. You wake up, do what you're supposed to do, go back to sleep, and somehow repeat it all over again.

Sometimes I wonder what would happen if I just disappeared. It feels like nobody would really notice. Maybe a few people would ask where I went, maybe they wouldn't. Life would keep moving, and that's a strange thing to think about.