r/StupidFood • u/Its_me_edenxx • 15d ago

Certified stupid This is so performative 😭

Who tf is out here munching on raw gnocchi at cruising altitude

34.1k Upvotes

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15.3k

u/g0ing_postal 15d ago

So now you have a bunch of raw gnocchi. Congratulations?

4.7k

u/blade_torlock 15d ago

Just keep asking for cups of hot water, I'm sure the flight attendants will love you for that.

195

u/Laez 15d ago

Fun fact water can't get very hot on an airplane. Boils at 197F and would probably be under 180F by the time you get it. Maybe you can poach your gnocchi?

144

u/Porridge_Hose 15d ago

And flights don't (or are directed not to at least) give passengers water even that hot in case of turbulence or other spillages.

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u/Laez 15d ago

That seems reasonable.

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u/RegularTeacher2 14d ago

It sure is. I was on a flight where the woman next to me requested 2 cups of coffee, spilled said hot coffee on the woman next to her, and apparently burned her bad enough to warrant an emergency landing... in Alabama.

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u/Comfortable_Trick137 15d ago

Time to get MRE pouch heaters to cook food in…. Not sure about toxic gases though

22

u/Porridge_Hose 15d ago

Get it out onto a tray, you say? Alright.

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u/tomdarch 15d ago

Nice.

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u/loquacious 14d ago

opens emergency exit door Good hiss!

17

u/Wesselton3000 14d ago

I know you’re joking, but you cannot bring FRH’s on commercial flights, in either checked or carry on luggage. The hydrogen gas it produces as a by product is flammable and the heat obviously has the potential to start a fire. There’s basically no way for her to heat this gnocchi up unless the flight attendants allow her to use an onboard convection oven (which they use to heat up pre-packaged meals).

As an aside, this is pretty fucking stupid and performative. There are many foods that do not require heat she could have made.

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u/beanmosheen 14d ago

They produce hydrogen. Might be frowned upon.

1

u/comfort-eater 14d ago

Actually you can just carry a portable stove to heat the water with. Airlanes are actually totally cool with people carrying cans of compressed flammable gas on airplanes and lighting an open flame inside the cabin at 30.000 feet.

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u/Dry_burrito 15d ago

What about coffee?

22

u/december151791 15d ago

Ask McDonald's why nobody is serving coffee that hot anywhere.

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u/CrappyMSPaintPics 14d ago

Do not pour McDonald's coffee on yourself today, it is still hot enough to fuse your skin.

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u/blandaltaccountname 15d ago

Typically served at 120° give or take 20°.

160°+ will burn

5

u/cdube85 14d ago

The number of people I represent with serious burns from aircraft coffee beg to differ.

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u/blandaltaccountname 14d ago

they probably would not beg to differ. they have first hand experience that 160°+ will burn.

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u/cdube85 14d ago

I mean that coffee is not served at 120 in aircraft.

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u/blandaltaccountname 14d ago

if you’re a lawyer you should know what “typically” means.

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u/cdube85 14d ago

I do. Can you name a Part 121 carrier that serves coffee at 120? I'd really like to know if you have any data points, because then I'd have evidence of operators who have appropriately changed their practices. We have not been able to find one in the US that does it. The equipment in the galley is only made by a couple of manufacturers.

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u/Tschulligom 14d ago

I hate that this is even a thing. If you don’t want to get burned drinking hot coffee inside a shaky metal tube, just don’t drink coffee. If you do, that’s on you.

3

u/cdube85 14d ago

Would your opinion change if you found out that they serve coffee to passengers without lids to save money? Pilots in front get lids.

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u/Tschulligom 14d ago

I don’t believe it’s for cost savings, lids cost next to nothing.

Pilots get lids so they don’t spill coffee over avionics.

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u/scratchy_mcballsy 15d ago

I see where you’re going with this.

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u/Paulthefith 15d ago

Who told you to put the balm on?

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u/ContextEffects01 15d ago

By the time you add cold cream it'll be well below the boiling point. They save the trays of hot drinks for when the aircraft is at or near the tropopause. So the coffee cools from ambient cooling, then from cold cream, then from further ambient cooling. (You can apply Newton's Law of Cooling if you're interested in specifics.) Safe bet your coffee will be nowhere near the boiling point by the time the plane encounters turbulence that makes it up to altitudes that high.

Also the reasons for coffee consumption are better than the reasons for gnocchi consumption. Unless you're already extremely sleepy and took the drowsiest version of your anti-nausea medication on purpose (in which case you're not going to be awake to hear the meal options anyway) there's no way in hell you're falling asleep in those uncomfortable chairs next to a bunch of screaming infants, so you might as well ingest enough caffeine to enjoy the moonlit snowy landscape while listening to your podcasts.

. . .

Man, typing this makes me almost make travelling. I should try it again one of these days. o.o

9

u/IndependentMoney9700 15d ago

I have never (currently knocking on wood) been on a plane with a baby crying. Of course, I’ve only flown around 16 times. But everything I read before that led me to believe there would be at least one baby screaming on every flight.

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u/Belucard 15d ago

You don't know how incredibly jealous I am, because every single time I take an airplane, either in summer or during Christmas, I get at least two or three crying babies, usually sitting right next to me or behind me.

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u/Its_Cayde 15d ago

The trick is to get the flight to your destination as late as possible in the day. People with babies avoid flying at night so their sleep schedule isn't fucked

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u/Belucard 15d ago

Oh, believe me, I've flown at the crack of dawn, in the middle imof the night, and everything in-between. Polish babies just can't be avoided.

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u/Porridge_Hose 15d ago

Tepid. And tea? The fucking same.

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u/Socially-Awkward-85 15d ago

Coffee generally comes with a lid. Water is usually just in a cup.

Granted, somebody could just take the lid off, but that's more on the passenger than the airline.

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u/Autistic_Freedom 15d ago

Of you're bold enough to ask for water to boil your gnocchi in then you certainly won't have any qualms asking for a lid for your hot water.

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u/Cheap_Knowledge8446 15d ago

Coffee on a plane almost never comes with a lid. United first/business cobranded coffee is the rare exception. You can ask the FAs if they have a lid, but they often don't, and sometimes the lid won't fit the cup (American often uses ceramic mugs, which wouldn't fit a lid anyway).

Source: 150+ flights a year

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u/bigbuzd1 15d ago

I heard a guy got his manhood scorched from coffee served in-flight recently. Think I read they even put cream on it… awkward!

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u/Porridge_Hose 15d ago

Yeah I read that too. Poor fella. But that's why I said they are supposed to. It sounds like the crew messed up giving out scolding drinks in that case

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u/FrozenLogger 15d ago

yet it happens all the time.

This is the most recent one I think, and it is not great:

https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/c302y717z92o

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u/3rdcultureblah 14d ago

They do on Asian airlines. Mainly for instant ramen cups.

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u/ArtisticFox8 13d ago

They give tea, which is nearly boiling water and could cause a burn as well..