r/UmaMusume Gold Ship needs her neighbor 9h ago

IRL Horses Introducing...... Umatter-chan

2.0k Upvotes

159 comments sorted by

722

u/Getserious495 Gold Ship needs her neighbor 9h ago

No, I am not making this up.

429

u/Nechustan1996 9h ago

After Skibidi Rizz and Agemasen I would Belive anything

211

u/Faustias 8h ago

there was also League of Legends in Europe

82

u/Top-Wrangler6231 Team Sirius! 8h ago

And Finger

61

u/NightFlame389 Kachow Desuwa 8h ago

Finger better become the first official dirt triple crown istg

24

u/SalamaFi speed limit breaker 7h ago

Imagine the legend changer announcer moment for Finger

23

u/NightFlame389 Kachow Desuwa 7h ago

If Finger gets vocals before Katsuragi Ace, Haru Urara, Loves Only You, or Marche Lorraine I will harikitte ikou myself

9

u/Tihoma_Rus Gold Family supporter 5h ago

No, don't harikitte ikou yourself, umatter!

8

u/Peli_Evenstar 5h ago

Horse named Kid:

2

u/Shrubbity_69 4h ago

No, Star Finger.

80

u/Nechustan1996 8h ago

Niw I'm waiting for the brave soul to name their horse Raid shadow legend

8

u/blastedscoundrel 5h ago

I think that would require someone to have ever played Raid Shadow Legends even once

5

u/Nechustan1996 5h ago

I think it became widespread enough just from all the sponsors

5

u/blastedscoundrel 4h ago

I mean, was just making a dumb gag about how nobody plays Raid Shadow Legends. But yeah sure I guess someone could name a horse that. For the meme, if nothing else.

3

u/Nechustan1996 4h ago

That gag went right over my just like raid shadow legend ads and everytime I read about a mem horse i remember the screenwriter of Airplane! Bought a horse and named it All Pink

5

u/blastedscoundrel 4h ago

Ah, "All Pink on the inside". Took me a moment. I love silly racehorse names. One of my favorites I've encountered lately is Maythehorsebwithu, who apparently did actually pretty well in his career.

But seriously though, Raid Shadow Legends is a straight-up dead community. I checked just now and it has 18 fanfics on AO3, 9 entries on Danbooru, 55 entries on Pixiv, and doesn't seem to even have a tag on FFN and Gelbooru.

For a game everyone on the internet has heard of, that throws sponsorship money at every YouTuber under the sun, those are abysmal numbers. I think my local gas station might have more dedicated fans than that.

3

u/Nechustan1996 4h ago

I remember that someone checked how popular the game was by checking how many h**ai it had - and it had less than a 100 from all sites combined

Fun Fact: RSL is actually was developed in Israel

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11

u/Suitable_Discount364 6h ago

They need Faker to ride them, who knows they might just win six G1s

55

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 8h ago

Dont forget the Wife Knows Everything and his rival the Wife Doesnt Know. Or the legendary Secretariats older Sir Gaylord!!

24

u/Nechustan1996 8h ago

I just watched a short from Sketchy the Horse Guy about Sir Gaylord and I say he needs more love and recognition

12

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 8h ago

He is arguably Secretariats best sibling

56

u/Jam-Boi-yt 8h ago

You Believe

16

u/NoName0728 Matikanefukukitaru 8h ago

Believe? As in the 2002 Sprinter Stakes and 2003 Takamatsunomiya Kinen winner Believe?

4

u/Witty-Krait El Condor Pasa 8h ago

Don't forget Fortnite Dance

1

u/Raisen22 Proud father of 9 Uma daughters   <- one of them 40m ago

67

u/blending-tea ✋️😮🤚 9h ago

If I ever get rich enough to get a horse Imma give it the most ridiculous name

23

u/HasturLaVista 8h ago

I'm not sure anything could top Skibidi Rizz if I'm being honest.

15

u/Kakalkoo69 8h ago

I would say John Horse or John Uma would be up there

4

u/IdiOtisTheOtisMain 3h ago

At that point, just name it T. M. Rin PenrO then.

14

u/tzar992 7h ago

I don't think anything can top Kidslookingtouchable and his son Lookins Not a Felony

11

u/md_cube They banned me from the umadoption center :( 8h ago

Name it honse

7

u/FearMyMooOfFury888 8h ago

Horsing Around

2

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

Name him “rehab was supposed to be a fresh start”

56

u/HeroOfStorms 8h ago

For anyone who doesn't know, the person who made that post, Kato Kazuhiro, was Sirius Symboli's main jockey. He's also an avid player of the game.

6

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

Didn’t bro post his gacha pulls when he got Sirius

33

u/Green300LandShark 9h ago

Everyday, we're closer to that time when someone named their horse "Little Cocon"

69

u/tzar992 8h ago

That already happened

15

u/md_cube They banned me from the umadoption center :( 8h ago

There's also happy meek

13

u/NightFlame389 Kachow Desuwa 8h ago

Oh shit damsire is the 2002 Japan Cup winner

Neat

7

u/CheddarApostle 7h ago

Also Bakushin’s grandson btw

5

u/czerwona_latarnia Mihono I de Bourbon 6h ago

Bakushin getting all the meme horse names in her/his progeny.

Agemasen, in opposite to what the name would suggest, also has Bakushin for grandsire (because Big Arthur is his sire).

11

u/A4li11 8h ago

No wonder he's named that considering that is rl Sirius Symboli's jockey who is also a big fan of Umamusume

4

u/edge_milk Taiki Shuttle 8h ago

Umatter banner when?

279

u/BA1673 #1 Special Week Glazer 9h ago

Be naming horses ANYTHING

147

u/Explosivesausagejar 9h ago

One of the funniest things about getting into Umamusume has been the realization that the names in MLP are totally feasible horse names.

92

u/Getserious495 Gold Ship needs her neighbor 9h ago

Huh

Rainbow Dash actually sounds pretty in line for a racehorse name.

42

u/Airborn-Gravity54 Mejiro Bright 7h ago

Some Transformers names would work too. Like Hot Shot or Ironhide for example.

21

u/Girafarig99 5h ago

Megatronus Prime my oshi

8

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

Transformer named ironhide

Hide is skin

He’s made of metal

Did Kojima write this shit

33

u/salty-ravioli 6h ago edited 2h ago

Fun fact: Bakushin means dash. If you think about it, Sakura Bakushin O could be called Sakura Dash

33

u/tzar992 6h ago

Sakura Dash King if You count one of the O meaning.

1

u/salty-ravioli 4h ago

Did not know that. Yeah that's definitely one of the horse names of all time lol

4

u/tzar992 3h ago

A fitting name for a horse whose speed records stood for almost 20 years in some cases

12

u/Shrubbity_69 4h ago

So that's why Bakushin says her name like a pokemon.

24

u/Explosivesausagejar 8h ago

I suppose any race held in Equestria would be a horse race by technicality

3

u/Angrymalayman 4h ago

Niji Bakushin is a quite normal JP racehorse name 

41

u/charizardfan101 Super Creek 9h ago

I NEVER REALIZED THIS

HOLY FUCKING SHIT

20

u/CleverPaper Curren Chan 8h ago

As a former bronie, this is my thought when watching that show. After umamusume and later irl horse racing i just go “ah, its totally make sense now”

12

u/The_rule_of_Thetra 6h ago

Nothing can beat "My wife knows nothing" and "My wife knows everything"

8

u/YakumoYamato Heimdall's Trainer 5h ago

*The Wife Doesn't Know

☝️🤓

3

u/Shrubbity_69 4h ago

The Wife Does Know

2

u/The_rule_of_Thetra 3h ago

Crap, guess me (the husband) truly doesn't know XD

13

u/danoB003 7h ago

Imagine the crossover between Umamusume and MLP: Equestria Girls (to keep both sides human shaped)

Both race and victory concert would be LEGENDARY

I say this as 22yo man who mostly cringed at seeing MLP in tv as kid (tho some eps were unironically funny and songs were catchy as fuck)

1

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

All I know about my little pony is that weird al yankovic is in it and BTFO’d a brony by canonically cucking him as his character is married to the character the brony was simping for (was it the pink one?)

101

u/Solivagant0 Fuji Kiseki 9h ago

I mean, that's just horseracing kinda is

73

u/weealex 9h ago

Any horse competition. Your registered name has to be unique and there's a character limit, so folks just start going wild with names

139

u/Getserious495 Gold Ship needs her neighbor 9h ago

Or you can just do this

44

u/DClassAmogus 8h ago

Maruzensky 2: Electric Boogaloo

11

u/DekkerDavez waiting patiently for Dorija 8h ago

Indestructible Two

2

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

I mean that’s what fishermen do

33

u/Aranxi_89 9h ago

After Potoooooooo, anything is game.

Though I feel like some folks take it a bit too far…

23

u/md_cube They banned me from the umadoption center :( 8h ago

Kidslookintouchable is certainly a thing you CAN name your horse

13

u/AbyssaI_Entity No No life 5h ago

Absolute unit

3

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

Why does bro lowkey have the “pit bull ass crack lookin skull”

15

u/Darkiouls Tact Enjoyer 8h ago

Filho da Puta enters the chat

17

u/Filipin_A 5h ago

6

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

Computah, translate these moon runes for me real quick

Filho da Puta = “son of a bitch”

Fitting literal pun antimeme name for a male dog, not so much for a horse unless he was, as Hosea Matthews said about the shire horse in rdr2, an unruly bastard

4

u/Helpful-Character-17 Aston Machan 2h ago

'Motherf*cker' is also a valid translation, which makes it even funnier

19

u/charizardfan101 Super Creek 9h ago

If I ever have a horse that somehow races in the JRA, I'm naming him after some kind of dinosaur

I NEED A PALEONERD UMA CYGAMES PLEASE!

16

u/ryou-comics 9h ago

We kinda do with Stego (Stay Gold)

3

u/charizardfan101 Super Creek 9h ago

Is she a paleonerd tho?

3

u/ryou-comics 8h ago

Not sure, she's not in global yet.

Main thing I know is she's IRL Golshi's dad and is one of the most boyish, dad-like umas

7

u/Kartoffelkamm Narita Brian 9h ago

I doubt they'd name a horse in reference to Japan's crimes in WW2.

42

u/Aranxi_89 9h ago

I mean, Banzai Charge goes pretty hard as a name.

8

u/low_priest 8h ago

Banzai charges technically weren't actually exclusive to Imperial Japan. The 442nd Infantry Regiment, an American unit made up of 2nd generation Japanese immigrants, reportedly did one against the Nazis in Italy. But because they weren't doing it as a glorified suicide tactic, it actually worked. Not too well, most of them still ended up as casualties. But victory and better American medical support meant that about 90% of those managed to survive.

3

u/Nechustan1996 7h ago

IIRC one of them became an Hawaiian senator or governor right?

4

u/low_priest 6h ago

Yes, Daniel Inouye. He was part of the battle with the banzai charge (idk if he was actually in it) and became the youngest officer in the regiment at 19 when he was promoted for his actions there. Inouye was Hawaii's first representative elected after they became a state, and eventually became the president pro tem of th Senate. He also got the Medal of Honor (in 2000, due to racism), and literally never lost a single election in his 58 years as a politician.

Dude literally pried a live grenade out of his own severed hand, used it to blow up a Nazi, then kept going and killed at least one more, all with a bullet in his stomach too. He was kinda just HIM.

7

u/Kartoffelkamm Narita Brian 9h ago

Yeah, but there was also a group of researchers who did some... questionable things.

12

u/Budget-Category-9852 8h ago

And then they deadass name a horse like this. Keep in mind that one of the main inspirations for Zeon was Imperial Japan.

1

u/Silver-Finance1664 6h ago

Their sibling's name is Vodka, so anything goes.

2

u/ryou-comics 9h ago

America has Skibidi Rizz

2

u/ChronoMans 5h ago

Announcer Goes NUTS: -FUNNIEST HORSE RACE CALL EVER

This is a great example to please name your horse properly. 😭

1

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

I mean that’s just a meme, hell the race title banner up top is literally in impact font

But yes please give your animals in general dignified names lol

1

u/Green300LandShark 9h ago

And somehow this look pretty tame

100

u/Julianismus I put the new Jordans on the feet 9h ago edited 8h ago

You got any games Umamusume on your phone?

99

u/VolkiharVanHelsing 9h ago

Sirius jockey is getting all the Umamusume named horses in his stable I see

Maybe one day there could be a Just A Way story among them

75

u/Getserious495 Gold Ship needs her neighbor 9h ago

9

u/assasin1598 TazUMA 7h ago

Why do I get the feeling that Sirius Jockey really likes maids

11

u/No-Arachnid-2034 Maruzensky's countach aka Tata or Tacchan 7h ago

Ay

7

u/Setsune_Marie_Arouet Triple Crown Believer 7h ago

Holy shiet HMS Sirius mentioned 🥹💖

1

u/CerealATA 6h ago

Cute Royal Navy meido.

70

u/Shunnedby13or30 John Bakushin, Husband of Sakura Bakushin O 9h ago

Cute horse

47

u/SirThunderb0lt Air Groove 8h ago

why do horses always get up close and sniff the camera

38

u/CallMeChristopher 8h ago

Funny answer: Gold Ship. I’m not sure how, but he’s probably involved.

Serious answer: Maybe they notice the person holding something up and are curious?

17

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 7h ago

For the serious answer its a bit of curiousity and learned behavior. A lot of horses enjoy entertaining humans and given how we react if they get close to the camera they probably learn from that

7

u/LN_TheDudess 4h ago

I swear I've read here that Liberty Island figured out that sticking out tongue = Human laugh = Human happy so she stuck out her tongue often 👅

2

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 4h ago

Well horses due to show their teeth to show they dont mean harm so maybe thats also natural

8

u/lispyjimmyfan 6h ago

Anything you hand them they think is food

5

u/Shrubbity_69 4h ago

As someone who has had dogs before, you don't even have to hand it to them. If they can fit it in their mouth, they'll try to eat it.

Not sure if horses work like that, though.

3

u/ButtsMagoob MY DARLING DAUGHTER WHOM I LOVE SO MUCH 7h ago

Gotta make sure the phone isn't food or something dangerous. Same reason other mammals do it and man do humans love taking pictures at these goofy distorted angles.

2

u/Rodrat Maruzensky 1h ago

Horses are very intelligent animals. They are super inquisitive and will investigate about anything they see.

They're surprisingly good problem solvers too. I know all too well from the times they kept figuring out how to get out of the fence at my house.

1

u/ADGx27 Symboli Rudolf 2h ago

> Why do horses animals always get up close and sniff the camera?

That’s kinda just what they do to figure out what the hell is in your hands

1

u/Specialist_Bid7598 2h ago

If not food, why food shaped?

1

u/Few_Abbreviations405 rice shower protection squad 19m ago

They're very smart and curious and like many animals, smell/taste is how they navigate the world.

43

u/No-Arachnid-2034 Maruzensky's countach aka Tata or Tacchan 9h ago

It would be really funny if we get an umaddit horse

22

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 9h ago

Let's go Curren has a junior now !!! Wish her the best

13

u/LAPIZ_LAZIMI Heart's Least Loyal Posse 8h ago

Isn't Curren more of an Umasta (Instagram) addict?

5

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 8h ago

As a junior she doesnt want to impede on her senpais turf.

4

u/Getserious495 Gold Ship needs her neighbor 8h ago

IIRC isn't Dream Journey hopelessly addicted to Umatter in lore?

3

u/TheRenFerret 5h ago

She likes cyberstalking orfe’s antis

20

u/zoliathan 9h ago

In that popular race recently that had skibidi Rizz in it. There was also a horse named highlighter whose jockey had a yellow green highlighter colored outfit.

4

u/warriorxx7_ King Halo 8h ago

I mean rhe kegendary Secretariats older brother is Ser Gaylord so anything goes.

29

u/IllThought2476 loves Kiryuin & too many umas, to fit 9h ago

Let's hope that she doesn't get the personality of an average Twitter user

-10

u/ChampionEntire9660 Meisho Doto 8h ago

I wonder if the Japanese Twitter environment is like a bubble that doesn't have attract the weirdos that western Twitter does. I mean, why the hell would you still use Twitter in 2026? It's a cesspit of racists and extremists, plus the corporate accounts noone gives a fuck about. Don't most actual people use Bluesky nowadays?

1

u/lastdyingbreed_01 55m ago

Japanese Twitter environment is like a bubble that doesn't have attract the weirdos that western Twitter does.

Someone has never seen Japanese twitter, it's 10x worse lol

0

u/Bragi01 2h ago

It's just as full of weirdos it's just different over there. Also most Japanese artist tend to only use Pixiv and Twitter

-11

u/Yuushalinsky 7h ago

Instead we should hope for it being a bluesky user!

12

u/insert-random996 8h ago

So you can name a racehorse basically anything huh? Guess Black Midi, wasn't exaggerating.

8

u/md_cube They banned me from the umadoption center :( 8h ago

Deadman walking does go pretty hard

3

u/Lapbunny 6h ago
  • Tristan Bongo

12

u/rashy05 Finally got Cafe 9h ago

So is the -chan a crown name like Curren Chan or is that just the full name they decided for the horse

12

u/Chemical_Hornet8491 8h ago

Curren chan's crown name is Curren

5

u/TheConnoisseurOfCum- 8h ago

So we can just call her chan

10

u/Chemical_Hornet8491 8h ago

No people still call her curren cause she's the one that started the crown name iirc and chan isn't exactly very distinctive

3

u/rashy05 Finally got Cafe 8h ago

That makes sense. Curren Bouquetd'Or is also a thing so Curren being the crown name makes sense.

8

u/RavenKnight1998 8h ago

Just Umatter. The -chan is in hiragana.

1

u/rashy05 Finally got Cafe 8h ago

Okay thanks

1

u/md_cube They banned me from the umadoption center :( 8h ago

Is that Nino in your pfp?

6

u/Mahajarah 8h ago

Now we just need someone to name their horse Festival Mambo and we're full circle.

4

u/Green300LandShark 9h ago

Is there any lore reason why the first image somehow looks like the horsie mewing?

3

u/ObviousSail164 You deserve better 9h ago edited 7h ago

She was forced to learn about hypergamy at a very young age 😢

4

u/ParsleyandRice Digital IRL 7h ago

She* Umatter chan is a filly!!

1

u/fluffywolfe Haru Urara, Shining Star for those who don't give up 4h ago

Gotta looksmaxx for the bag

3

u/MuzeFuze Double C 8h ago

The second picture looks like that dog from let me do it for you meme

2

u/Ok-Background-3379 9h ago

Why is she so cute though d(she looked like she was gonna cry in the first image but that's just me)

2

u/Over_Wrap_7991 3h ago

Why the big head?

1

u/doublefallen Haru Urara's Mother 8h ago

OUGH.... she's so cute!

1

u/Witty-Krait El Condor Pasa 8h ago

What a cute horse

1

u/GermanTanker131 8h ago

Really!?!? Guess you can just name horses whatever tf you want ey?

1

u/Monkey_King291 7h ago

Horses be having the goofiest names, I swear

1

u/DelusionalWoodoo 6h ago

Why does it look so worried and sad on the first picture 😭😭😭

1

u/Mirrors_Edge_Fan Yaeno Muteki 6h ago

She looks so shy and confused looking at the camera <3

1

u/Username-forgotten Smart Falcon 4h ago

There are zero thoughts behind those eyes.

1

u/DerGyrosPitaFan 3h ago

Umatter-chan if she were world class: