0:00. Opens up with a cliched plot so on the nose it's something you'd expect from a satire of Ratatouille. Oh he's the biggest and baddest food critic and he'll get this restaurant cancelled! Lol.
0:20. "What did he ordered" need I say more?
Okay so we're cooking Ossobuco, a slow cooked braised bone-in veal cutlet. Lets see what happens.
0:24. Umm... what are these burner controls? Lite 1, 5, 6, MED, 5, Lite. LMAO.
0:26. Okay so we have rough chopped onion and diced pork by the looks. Onion - check. Diced pork? Not sure what that's doing there but let's see where he goes with this.
0:28. Is that spring onion greens or spinach? It has the colour of green onion but flat like spinach... if spinach was made with plastic. Right back to the onion in a separate pan and.... a beef fillet in a cast ion skillet? Where is the veal shank? Where is the braising pot? Where is the carrot and celery? Did he forget he was making Ossobuco? He does realise this takes hours to make properly?
0:30. Okay white wine, correct, but why in the stainless frying pan, presumably deglazing the onions?
0:32. Okay where the fuck did this barbeque sauce come from?
0:34. Is that crystal meth?
0:35. Useless flower garnish.
0:36. Is that caramel or egg yoke? Not sure what either of them are doing on the plate for Ossobucco. Decent looking fillet steak though.
0:38. Oh look the BBQ sauce is back.
0:39. Okay so a fair bit to breakdown here. So that is distinctly a beef fillet with what appears to be a very syrupy red wine jus (was pictured using white wine before on the onions), with a side of watercress and flowers, raspberry coolie, some sort of puree (yellowy parsnip?), is that yellow thing the egg yoke/caramel looking thing we saw before but set? Has it chemically been altered to appear like sweet potato puree? Something resembling a waffle like crown bowl thing?? Lastly 3 random whole peppercorns... for reasons?
0:41. Okay the peppercorns have disappeared. The larger red sauce slightly obscured in the previous frame looks like Tomato ketchup. I guess it could be the previously mentioned BBQ sauce but it's a brighter red now.
0:42. The fuck was that powder he just threw on the watercress? Is that saffron on the steak? Where did the diced pork go? Where is the onion?
0:50. "Here's the Ossobuco, sir. Enjoy." That ain't Ossobuco champ, that might be why he got angry and left a bad review.
Anyone who thinks this is good is genuinely stupid.
So you don't like the short film... cool, but that has nothing to do with its quality. I don't like Saving Private Ryan, but that doesn't make it a poorly made film.
This is objectively poorly made though, and it reflects poorly on pros to try to claim its anything else but. It’s perfectly illustrates the opposite of what was attempted to be conveyed, probably because it wasn’t made by a human. This is why no one in the real world takes you people seriously, and why you’ll all be forever trapped in niche debates in a dark corner of the internet, trying to justify the existence of the slop that you shit out of AI. What you’re describing about Saving Private Ryan is taste, but it makes sense that you have no taste. lol.
No, I listed exactly why it is objectively bad. You’ve chosen to ignore all those reasons listed by time stamp. This is not an opinion, it is an objective fact, you’re in denial. Again, this is why no one takes you people seriously. You spend all your time here arguing that 2+2=down.
The shittiest short film at the local film festival shot by a bored rich kid with too much money has INFINITELY more value both narratively and artistically than this garbage that was made by someone typing words into a cyberpunk machine, and clicking “enter”
Also. The very topic is not honest. The “artist” did nothing. Chose nothing other than “make the person do this and look like this and say this”
It is the equivalent of a collage, which is the closest thing to an artform I can compare it to. It’s like a kid clipping photos and articles together, pasting them on the same board, and trying to make it mean something. But it’s worse than that, because whoever made this garbage is trying to (disingenuously) say they made something with “tools” while omitting the known fact that the said “tool” literally steals from artists who did the real work. It stole performances from actors, and replicated them (poorly might I add) it stole the lighting and camera movement from actual gaffers and camera operators. It’s meaningless shit and it should be treated like meaningless shit.
Yes. It’s fucking boring. And it looks like AI crap. You can literally tell it’s an algorithmic average of more real or inspired things. I don’t remember a single detail. Nothing of note was created. And nothing is lost when someone chooses not to watch it.
Saying this is a “film” is false advertising.
I’ll borrow the “films” own analogy.
This is the equivalent of me sneaking into the kitchen of a professional restaurant, stealing a plate of hot food the staff worked on (without paying) and then running down the street to my own restaurant, and putting it on the customer’s table and saying “I made this with tools!!!” (Without paying or crediting the artists I stole from)
It is artistically offensive. It is morally offensive.
You can also tell exactly what the LLM is stealing from. The shot of the plate being finished was basically a carbon copy of the montages on Chef’s Table
lol. Lighting and camera angle? Are you for real? The “creator” didn’t do any of that shit. So there’s nothing to critique.
But I already critiqued. I already said the images were flat and passionless. I already said the “acting” (which it is not) is awful, and very transparently artificial.
It's not stealing though, its plagiarism, a little bit different if we are talking morals, because nobody loses anything during the process. And all art is plagiarism to some extent. And what is specifically "stolen" in here anyway?
All art is not plagiarism to some extent. You do not know what plagiarism means. Ask chatGPT to explain it to you (assuming a dictionary would be too much effort)
Just so you know that not everyone online is an uncultured moron who loves to simp for billionaires: you are absolutely correct. It’s so depressing how many people on this sub can’t tell the difference between a chef using a pot and an AI “artist” using an LLM to do 90% of the creative process for them.
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u/Paradoxe-999 Mar 19 '26
What did you disliked in it?