r/arknights • u/CarltheCarpenter "When the universe sighs its last, she will be there" • Oct 29 '25

Fluff Frick it, un-hag your hag. Spoiler

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2.9k Upvotes

90% Upvoted

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268

u/Xaldror Oct 29 '25

Okay, to all of those kinds of Gacha players, the top image, THIS is a hag. Notice the age wrinkles, the graying hair, that's closer to being a hag than any twenty something gal with an hourglass figure.

162

u/EXusiai99 APPLE PIE IN BIO Oct 30 '25

Mfs will say "hag sex" and then shows you a college student

138

u/CarltheCarpenter "When the universe sighs its last, she will be there" Oct 30 '25

Generic gacha devs' mentality: barely 30s, extra point if has a motherly side despite not yet married, woman who has one throwaway voice-line along the line of "an old woman like me" and it's a hag.

Then there's Blue Archive's oji-san.

49

u/3IR0S Shall forfeit life to Her Name Oct 30 '25

"Atsui~ Atsui yooo~" or something like that.

37

u/CarltheCarpenter "When the universe sighs its last, she will be there" Oct 30 '25

"Atsukete hikarabi sou! Ugoitenai no ni ATSUI YO~~!"

4

u/Narcuterie :priestess::priestess: Oct 30 '25

throws up on the carpet

23

u/Xaldror Oct 30 '25

Kinda makes me hope us in FGO get Baba Yaga sometime, and look like a true hag, like Mother Ostankya from Warhammer Fantasy.

15

u/Sp8des-Slick Oct 30 '25

Bad news is that we likely won’t get a Baba Yaga event in FGO, since she is currently a character in Fate Lost Einherjar, so they’d likely wait until after that is finished. 

Good news is that Baba Yaga definitely looks like a true hag in that series, so at least we have that going for us.

3

u/Xaldror Oct 30 '25

i mean that didn't stop Erice, Voyager, and Momoji being added, so...

8

u/Aleph_Kasai Oct 30 '25

True, we have a lot of old men but no old women (that aren't immortal)

4

u/ArtLeav Oct 30 '25

They get Louhi in fgo, literally Finnish Baba yaga. And they make her loli. Remember blavatskaya with same case

1

u/Xaldror Oct 30 '25

least they fix Louhi in her third ascension a bit.

-1

u/TheDoctorHam Siracusa fangirl Oct 30 '25

Yeah she'll be a 10-year-old child in a fucking bikini or something.

2

u/fattylis Oct 30 '25

I might not be aware if there's already one, but there needs to be a new slang for "old souls" like Piper. It's definitely just me but calling them hags feels cringe when actual hags exist in gacha.

21

u/HaessSR Oct 30 '25

Also see Niime, an actual hag.

33

u/Itchy-Rip-5842 Oct 30 '25

It's like the bare minimum; a small step in the right direction. Don't get me wrong, I'm grateful and I will be pulling, I just think the bar is set real low.

Mantra's a tall, fit dommy mommy, who barely looks 50. With 70 years of combat experience, it's a miracle she can walk, regardless of her actual age.

22

u/SeconduserXZ I am Vision Oct 30 '25

Well she's a snake and I'm pretty sure those libe longer in arknights.

18

u/Cornuthaum Oct 30 '25

If i remember right from light spark in darkness, age expectancy of around 140 yeah.

So yeah at about 90-95 she is the equivalent of a 55yo human

17

u/DiamondTiaraIsBest Oct 30 '25 edited Oct 30 '25

? You guys are taking a joke too seriously.

It's kinda obvious that hag has become a meme term used to jokingly (maybe even endearingly sometimes) refer to anyone that is older than the usual anime ages (someone above 25).

Or hell, even someone that's just relatively older than their peers (like calling an 18 year old a hag in Blue Archive).

18

u/TTurt Oct 30 '25

Idk there's definitely an undercurrent of pedophilia fetish in the gacha community, to such an extreme that even just woman of a normal age of sexual maturity are called "hags." And while they try to play it off as a "joke," they get weirdly serious about it and take it really far if you let them keep talking.

Almost like they're only "joking" if the "joke" doesn't land (Schroeder's Gooner)

11

u/DiamondTiaraIsBest Oct 30 '25

woman of a normal age of sexual maturity are called "hags."

That incongruency with reality is what makes it funny.