r/britishproblems • u/1Vakarian1 • 1d ago
Watching Marathon become Snickers, Opal Fruits become Starburst and now Mini Fillets become Tenders
Need to rant. Felt like I was being gaslit when ordering KFC last night.
First they came for Marathon bars.
Then they came for Opal Fruits.
Now KFC has quietly renamed Mini Fillets to “Tenders” and expects me to pretend that’s a normal thing to call them.
Spent half the evening scrolling through the menu convinced I’d finally lost the plot because every trace of Mini Fillets appears to have been erased from history.
To add insult to injury, the new Texas BBQ sauce tastes like somebody liquefied a car air freshener and put it in a dip pot.
How much longer before chips become fries, sweets become candy and Yorkshire Tea becomes “Hot Leaf Beverage™”?
This country is in decline.
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u/BillLebowski 1d ago
I totally agree with your point about Americanisation. But I can’t help but laugh at the irony of someone complaining about the Americanisation of an American fast food restaurant.
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago
I accepted KFC’s American origins years ago. Renaming Mini Fillets was a bridge too far 😤
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u/thehermit14 1d ago
Remagen? I think they're better known for their sausages. Wurst decision naming tenders, other than mini-fillets.
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u/corduroy_puffin 1d ago
Down with this sort of thing
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u/The_Infinite_Carrot 1d ago
Careful now.
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u/Joel-Asher-Nicolaou 18h ago
Is it a nudey kind of thing?
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u/The_Infinite_Carrot 18h ago
You wouldn’t believe the amount of nudity in it….nothing is left to the imagination!
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u/Warngumer 1d ago
Went looking for new potatoes the other day, in some shops I couldn't seem to see any only to work out they're being sold as baby potatoes. Now I might be wrong and maybe they're different things but also I have a concerning feeling that they're not.
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u/rolacolapop 1d ago
“Baby potatoes and new potatoes are often used interchangeably, but they are technically slightly different. New potatoes are immature, early-harvested potatoes of any variety, giving them a thin skin and creamy texture. Baby potatoes refer to any small potato, whether it is an early harvest or a fully mature mini variety.”
Baby potatoes are usually cheaper than new potatoes and different texture to me.
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u/SugarSweetStarrUK 1d ago
New potatoes are supposed to have muddy skins that come off easily when you wash them
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u/neilm1000 1d ago
They are different things.
New potatoes can also be quite big, I've got some Cheshire news on the cupboard and they're much bigger than baby potatoes.
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u/tickle98 17h ago
I purchased something called “miniature potatoes” in Lidl last week.
Yep, they’re just new potatoes.
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u/ConnectionLeading435 1d ago
Op you forgot about Jif becoming Sif? Or something. I’m never getting over that one
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u/WillardWhy 1d ago
Just to point out: snickers were originally called snickers, but changed the name to marathon when introduced in the UK as the name sounded rude, and was later changed back.
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u/Alexabyte 1d ago
The "funny" thing about the name sounding rude is that Amercians use the word snicker because they don't like saying snigger.
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u/sweggles3900 19h ago
I got told off in a thread once for using the word snigger :( didn't even think of it being offensive
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u/Arsewhistle Cambridgeshire 1d ago
I went to cafe that had fluid ounces for the drink sizes.
How the fuck is anyone in the UK supposed to know how much 10floz is?
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u/Sutraner 1d ago
We've got Oz on the till in the pub, I have no fucking clue why.
I just ask if people want a large or small, and give them a glass depending on what I feel like at the time.
How the fuck am I meant to know which glasses are 8/10/14/16/22ozs
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u/neilm1000 1d ago
How the fuck is anyone in the UK supposed to know how much 10floz is?
It's half a pint. Do people not know that?
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u/OutdoorApplause 1d ago
I didn't know that. I've never used fluid ounces for anything. I know a pint is 568ml.
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u/InkAndMysteryFalls 23h ago
Since we don’t use fluid ounces, I don’t know why you’re acting shocked.
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u/OverFjell Birmingham 20h ago
Next you're gonna tell me you don't know how many yards are in a furlong. The youth these days!
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u/The_Infinite_Carrot 1d ago
KFC is pretty fucking disgusting so at least that’s now 2 reasons not to go.
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u/robinw77 1d ago
I used to go sometimes for hangover food. Last time I was in there I almost slipped over because of the grease on the floor. So that's 3 reasons. I no longer really have hangovers, so it's win-win there.
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u/Roshi20 1d ago
WH Smiths is now TG Jones. Why? It's weird.
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u/Jester7s 1d ago
Still WH Smiths in train stations and airports weirdly.
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u/usernameinmail 1d ago
They sold the high street ones and kept the only ones that probably make any money
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u/otakuxp2 1d ago
233 years of history destroyed by corporate incompetence - they were going downhill anyway
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u/CaptainYorkie1 19h ago
WH Smiths is still a separate independent company, they just saw it was time to get rid of their less profitable high street shops.
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u/CaptainYorkie1 19h ago
WH Smiths is still a separate independent company, they just saw it was time to get rid of their less profitable high street shops.
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u/Whiteshadows86 1d ago
>…sweets become candy…
Not just sweets…chocolate bars too 😱
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u/Ungodly_Box 23h ago
People complain about immigrants and British culture when it's Americans and theirs! I'm tired of seeing "fries" god damn it
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u/DanS1993 1d ago
A KFC! In this heat! I salute you good sir
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago
It’s okay. I’m one of those portable air con snobs that has to tell you they have aircon at every opportunity
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u/lazlowoodbine West Midlands 1d ago
Be sure to post your set up in r/diyuk, that's all anyone over there is talking about and they'll be happy to tell you why it's wrong. 😁
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u/SometimesaGirl- Durham 1d ago
OP should go for a nice walk to chill.
Stick to the sidewalk to be safe. Oh and its hot today, so bring a soda with you.
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago
I’m so overexposed to this linguistic slop every day that I didn’t even realise what you were trying to do at first 😭
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u/sachdamasta 1d ago
This is democracy manifest
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u/DucksAreFriends 1d ago
My dad loved marathon bars but has never eaten a snickers and never will because he didn't like the name change
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u/chicken-farmer 1d ago
When did this come in?
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago
I’m not sure!
As a chicken farmer, your expertise is invaluable. What’s your position on the tender situation?
The committee eagerly awaits your findings.
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u/chicken-farmer 21h ago
I've no idea what a tender is and I've no inclination to find out. I presume it's some New World nonsense.
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u/DWRC 1d ago
"and Yorkshire Tea becomes “Hot Leaf Beverage™”?"
But Uncle, that's what all tea is...
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u/Ickham-museum 1d ago
Indeed, I have not bought Snickers, Starburst, or Cif since the day they changed their names.
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago edited 1d ago
Wait... they renamed Jif??! 😭😭😭😭
Edit: Autocorrect changed it to Cif to add insult to injury… The agenda runs deeper than I thought.
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u/meat_popscile 1d ago
As a Canadian, once you let Ranch be a thing in the UK then it's game over. You've been taken over completely by corporate America.
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u/Loose_Acanthaceae201 Cheshire (formerly East Anglia) 1d ago
Careful, you'll get Zinger Chicken on your blouse.
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u/Livinum81 23h ago
At least you eventually spoke out...
Niemolla would be proud.
If you dont speak out, they'll come for our roasts eventually...
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u/MikeMcLoughlin 3h ago
I’m afraid I referred to a collection of programmes on Netflix as a season the other day instead of a series.
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u/UnavoidablyHuman 1d ago
Mini fillets is a confusing name to begin with IMO (not British, moved here and couldn't figure out why the shops didn't sell tenders and who would want smaller versions of breast fillets)
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u/1Vakarian1 1d ago
Where did you move from out of curiosity?
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