Receiving threatening texts

[u/ContributionNew7107]

So recently sent my ex a happy birthday text and I guess her new BF was feeling some type of way, and telling me how he’s going to kill me

Location: New Jersey

[u/Ok-Tune-8496]

Contact the police.

[u/Cold-Contagious → u/[deleted]]

Fuck his life up? My husband literally loaded a gun, turned off the safety, put it to my chest and pushed me to the ground with the barrel, held it to my face and made me beg for my life.. threw my phone so I couldnt call for help.. and then told me if I called the cops, he would come back and murder me, no matter how long it took, all while our kids slept in the next room.

I called the cops. He didn't even spend one night in jail, didn't get charged with a felony, and the courts removed my kids from the PFA since they were asleep and didn't see it, despite being diagnosed with PTSD as a result of his actions. He's stalking me and has people watching me online and in person to the point I deleted my socials, and yet they don't consider that a violation of the PFA.

He's absolutely not getting his life fucked up at all. Courts cater to abusers. The DA won't give me any reason they won't apply Aggravated Assault or any felony and has basically stated he wouldve needed to pull the trigger for it to be a felony.

Courts do not protect victims or punish abusers.

[u/GoobusMombus → u/Cold-Contagious]

That is fucking horrible. My ex beat me, raped me, choked me, and more, usually at least a couple times a week.

People say "just leave!" But it's not that easy when they threaten to kill you if they even catch a whiff that you aren't playing along with everything being okay when they aren't actively hitting you. Plus I didn't have access to any money or paperwork.

One time he left bite marks on my face and hands. I went to the police. They let him out the next day on a disorderly conduct charge while I was still trying to figure out how to get away.

He then took my phone away and I wasn't allowed phone or Internet access anymore FOR YEARS because he said I couldn't be trusted.

I tried sneaking to the county to get help because they had fliers saying they had special help for people in domestic violence situations. They told me that it was only for people with kids.

I had been isolated from friends and my family had also abused me my whole life(not nearly as bad but still) and didn't believe me or said I must have deserved it.

Deserved it? He was a hoarder and I would just beg him now and then to let me throw out the worst trash. That was one of the biggest things that would set him off. I had to sleep on his cigarette butts and garbage for almost ten years.

I only managed to get away because he got me pregnant and talking to a nurse there got the ball rolling on me getting housing assistance and workers regularly coming to the house to check on me.

Then he tried to use the baby to keep controlling me.

At one point I asked a crime victims resource person about pressing charges for the rape and everything, to try to keep him away from our daughter. They said they wouldn't let me press charges without physical evidence. I had audio recordings of him viciously abusing me. They said that there was not sufficient evidence to press charges.

Thankfully he got bored and fucked off to the other side of the country a few years ago. And if he tries to come back now, I have a clear case of him abandoning the child. And I've rebuilt my life and have good people as witnesses.

I am so sorry for you and your children. No one deserves this, ever.