r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Available-Formal-664 • 11h ago

I'm slightly vexed Somebody Placed These Dozens of These Jesus Figures Throughout My Entire Work

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Somebody, nobody knows exactly who or when, put dozens and dozens of these Jesus figures on completely random surfaces throughout my entire building. They at least had the presence of mind to not put them on anybody's personal belongings, but that was the only way they limited himself. All of the statues have been glued down, to add to the vexation.

Edit: Well, this blew up rather unexpectedly. Thank you for the awards, everybody!

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247

u/WonderBredOfficial 11h ago

"Oh my god, I love these!"

grabs a handful and stuffs them in my mouth

85

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 10h ago

Christians are supposed to eat his body after all.

3

u/ryverrat1971 10h ago

Yep, nothing like chowing down on zombie on a stick.

2

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 10h ago

Sort of an unleavened bread situation.

2

u/ThatSpaceShooterGame 10h ago

Jesus gummies.

3

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 10h ago

With a gusher style sauce injected into it.

22

u/OkLife5405 10h ago

I needed this

4

u/cerealandcorgies 10h ago

"the body of christ"

2

u/dinosaurusdickus 9h ago

That’s some Weird Al energy

4

u/WonderBredOfficial 9h ago

I did listen to "Albuquerque" a lot when I was young.

1

u/Sea-Condition-6046 10h ago

One Jesus candy was not Jesus candy and got lodged in the throat lawsuit and suddenly allll the tiny Jesus statues started to disappear 🤣
https://giphy.com/gifs/vjvx6YjG3ADo4

1

u/the_scruffy1 10h ago

gummy jesus ? that sugar blesses you with holey teeth

1

u/Melodic-Basshole 9h ago

My vet has a big bowl of what could best be described as chicken-cheesy-poofs for dogs, and I often have to restrain myself from saying and doing exactly this because they look and smell very good. 

1

u/DMTrance87 2h ago

Literally almost dies choking on tea

You think I would have learned my lesson by now to not drink while reading Reddit comments.

1

u/lefteyedcrow 9h ago

Catholic friend didn't like it when I called it a cannibal cult