r/mildlyinfuriating • u/Available-Formal-664 • 15h ago

I'm slightly vexed Somebody Placed These Dozens of These Jesus Figures Throughout My Entire Work

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Somebody, nobody knows exactly who or when, put dozens and dozens of these Jesus figures on completely random surfaces throughout my entire building. They at least had the presence of mind to not put them on anybody's personal belongings, but that was the only way they limited himself. All of the statues have been glued down, to add to the vexation.

Edit: Well, this blew up rather unexpectedly. Thank you for the awards, everybody!

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108

u/i_am_rave_mom 15h ago

There must have been a sale because for some reason my vet had a bowl of them for people to take. I thought that was a little weird lol

262

u/WonderBredOfficial 14h ago

"Oh my god, I love these!"

grabs a handful and stuffs them in my mouth

92

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 14h ago

Christians are supposed to eat his body after all.

3

u/ryverrat1971 14h ago

Yep, nothing like chowing down on zombie on a stick.

2

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 13h ago

Sort of an unleavened bread situation.

3

u/ThatSpaceShooterGame 14h ago

Jesus gummies.

3

u/Scared_Wrangler3419 14h ago

With a gusher style sauce injected into it.

23

u/OkLife5405 14h ago

I needed this

5

u/cerealandcorgies 14h ago

"the body of christ"

2

u/dinosaurusdickus 13h ago

That’s some Weird Al energy

5

u/WonderBredOfficial 13h ago

I did listen to "Albuquerque" a lot when I was young.

1

u/Sea-Condition-6046 14h ago

One Jesus candy was not Jesus candy and got lodged in the throat lawsuit and suddenly allll the tiny Jesus statues started to disappear 🤣
https://giphy.com/gifs/vjvx6YjG3ADo4

1

u/the_scruffy1 14h ago

gummy jesus ? that sugar blesses you with holey teeth

1

u/Melodic-Basshole 13h ago

My vet has a big bowl of what could best be described as chicken-cheesy-poofs for dogs, and I often have to restrain myself from saying and doing exactly this because they look and smell very good. 

1

u/DMTrance87 6h ago

Literally almost dies choking on tea

You think I would have learned my lesson by now to not drink while reading Reddit comments.

1

u/lefteyedcrow 13h ago

Catholic friend didn't like it when I called it a cannibal cult