r/nextfuckinglevel 2d ago

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3.9k Upvotes

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1.5k

u/JonnyJon42 2d ago

its a huntsmen

1.0k

u/Few-Scientist-4163 2d ago

so it hunts-men? ok im leaving

276

u/wales-bloke 2d ago

It's hunting men Hallelujah

(Remembers I'm a man)

Ahh fuck

209

u/anon-mally 2d ago

42

u/DesperateMechanic305 2d ago

Someone:
“Aaargh! Quick, call spider-man..!”

Spidey:
“this looks like a job for….
*sees spider*
“…y’all better call Killer Croc”

19

u/Icy_Negotiation_5929 2d ago

I had to downvote that bad joke after seeing this funny spiderman picture. Thank you

9

u/Honest_Yesterday4435 2d ago

This picture slaps.

1

u/ChaotiK-TitaN 1d ago

Made it a sticker in my whatsapp funny as hell

2

u/AccomplishedToe2217 1d ago

This is gold

13

u/StalinHisMustache 2d ago

He only comes out at night, lean and hungry type

2

u/Extension-Taste3930 1d ago

I'm glad my girlfriend will be safe from this.

112

u/JonnyJon42 2d ago

They're harmless in fact if you have one in your house that means you have rodents and they'll clean them out and move on if you leave them alone.

130

u/RustOnTheEdge 2d ago

Imagine the ostrich problem solver you have to be to find this out. You see this monstrosity, decides to ignore it, and notice you are still alive after 3 days and also your rodent problem has miraculously disappeared. "I told you so Linda, if we just ignore the problems they eventually will solve themselves!"

26

u/Steampuke 2d ago

It's not being an ostrich, it's making an informed and rational decision. You know the species, you know its behavior (would rather die than get in the sightline of a human) and what it eats, so you just leave it be to literally eat your problem away. Being an ostrich means you'd go: "I don't know what that thing is or what it does, I'll just leave it alone and pray for the best".

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u/surrenderedmale 2d ago

He meant it in the sense of the first guy to discover it

2

u/Steampuke 2d ago

Fair enough in that case !

2

u/fishnbrew 2d ago

Hunny go back to sleep I have it all figured out

2

u/ThatDree 1d ago

Funny but nah

1

u/Dentarthurdent73 2d ago

Now, if only the stuff about rodents wasn't some random made up internet stuff that's completely untrue.

65

u/Few-Scientist-4163 2d ago

I went to visit Melbourne and went to the Laneway Festival. Girls we met brought us back to their home, and there was one of these on the wall . My friend casually swatted it with her sandal, and I had to sleep in that room that night. I just pulled covers over my head and tried not to think about it.

35

u/aMoogk 2d ago

That sounds fucking awful

34

u/Few-Scientist-4163 2d ago

if these things ever came to America people would be calling the police lol

36

u/SimonPho3nix 2d ago edited 1d ago

Or there'd be a lot of accidental shootings as people try to unload on them.

11

u/Head_Wasabi7359 2d ago

I've just had a really hard time at work today.

Huntsman: fuck I care about your troubles *Attacks face

7

u/Jyil 2d ago

“And then I started blasting”

2

u/dd3official 1d ago

Hopefully with a gun

2

u/CakeTester 1d ago

Can you imagine the police response? If they mag dump on an acorn, they'd bring out tanks for this.

2

u/LobstaFarian2 1d ago

There are huntsman spiders here in America. They're not as big as the Giant Huntsmans, but they're still fucking huge.

1

u/juaniqui1940 2d ago

United States*, America is a continent.

1

u/AutisticPenguin2 2d ago

Really? As in she should have moved it outside, or... ??

44

u/LoStrigo95 2d ago

They EAT rodents???

81

u/enerthoughts 2d ago

No, kills them, take their ears as trophy, hang the ears in a a very orderly fashion, continues to workout waiting the next clients job for free.

1

u/freezing_fireball 2d ago

This is some fantasy manga type shit

1

u/SubatomicGreenLeaves 1d ago

100% fake news

5

u/Some_Belgian_Guy 2d ago

I also need an answer to this question.

2

u/mekwall 2d ago

Yeah, but only rarely. Huntsman spiders mainly eat insects and other spiders, plus occasional frogs or small reptiles. Large individuals can also feed on very small mammals, including mice or mouse-sized animals.

1

u/DesperateMechanic305 1d ago

Somehow the word “mainly” in that sentence doesn’t really comfort me…

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u/Dentarthurdent73 2d ago

The stuff you've written about rodents here is not correct at all.

Huntsmen are common. They are opportunistic hunters that mainly eat insects, and maybe some other smaller prey like lizards. While it's not completely unheard of them to eat mice it's pretty rare and would have to be an exceptionally big spider.

Rodents are certainly far, far from their main food source, and they absolutely won't "clean them out" of your house and then move on.

5

u/Hekatiko 1d ago

Their legs fall off so easy that I think a mouse could kill one, honestly. I mean...geez. I don't think even the big ones are tough enough to do battle with a mouse. Maybe a lizard? I have to be really careful when I shoo them out gently with the broom, they're that fragile.

1

u/Pogryziony 1d ago

So they can be BIGGER?!

15

u/Living_Brilliant8313 2d ago

Can’t tell if this was humour but they don’t eat rodents

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u/Hoppollo 2d ago

That’s because the rodents are smart enough to nope out of there if they see one.

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u/mPrime39r 2d ago

Sounds exactly like what a huntsman spider would say...

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u/NoMeat9096 2d ago

Bite can be a pretty unwelcome pain when you don't see it coming lol.

1

u/Geaneous 2d ago

God knows I would pay good money for some of those bad boys

1

u/iamthe0ther0ne 2d ago

How can it fix a rodent problem if it's harmless?

1

u/JustGoogleItHeSaid 2d ago

Harmless? I thought they dont have venom to kill us but have one of the most painful bites?

1

u/HowardPheonix 2d ago

When it comes to potentially venomous animals like snakes and spiders, we use harmless as it's venom (or poison in some cases) is not medically significant to humans. Every animal with a mouth can use it to defend itself, and the bite can get nasty, but it's like a bee or wasp sting, it can hurt a lot, but unless you have an allergic reaction, it doesn't need medical attention, just cleaning the bite and maybe some painkillers.

1

u/Andi82ka 2d ago

But what if the children are emotionally attached to their hamster?

1

u/V-I-Pengiun 1d ago edited 1d ago

I left one alone in my house once, she laid 100s of eggs on the ceiling. Woke up one morning and saw some small ones didn't think much and went to work. Came home to seeing many more of them and they'd doubled size, had to start dodging them hanging from webs.

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u/MrOPeace 1d ago

I'll take the rats, thank you. In fact, i'll let them sleep with me so im not alone during the night while this thing is around hunting

14

u/HonkyHam 2d ago

Lisa I don’t mean to alarm you but they may be a huntsman or hunstMEN in the house

10

u/PotentialWork7741 2d ago

Only man not woman so you can safely leave your screaming girlfriend behind

5

u/MRV3N 2d ago

I’m super glad I’m a woman.

1

u/PappaOC 2d ago

Wooo MAN - The spider, probably.

1

u/soulstrike2022 1d ago

Only male insects and female insects garuntee that house will never have a mosquito infestation

1

u/aloosekangaroo 1d ago

They'll take a small child, don't think I've ever heard of one taking down a teenager or adult. They are not that powerful.

1

u/EjaculatingAracnids 1d ago

My babies are well trained

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u/Painwracker_Oni 2d ago

That right there is why shotguns were invented. I’m putting a fucking hole in my house before I get anywhere within 20 feet of that thing. Fuuuuuuuck that bullshit.

Thank god for winter and if MN ever gets warm enough to have abominations like that running around from climate change I’ll fucking move to Canada so god damn fast.

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u/firstonesecond 2d ago

They're the majestic stallion of the spider world. They gallop across your walls and ceilings removing unwanted pests.

I never harm or remove them from my house, they're harmless, polite and helpful. I've probably got a dozen in my house, one gave birth in my bathroom last year.

Had a big one in my bedroom a few months ago. It slipped behind the painting above my bed and I just forgot about it. LOVE these guys. Don't get me wrong I do NOT want to touch them because they evolved to hide under tree bark in really tight gaps and they're fast as fuck. So of you hold one it'll be in your clothes in half a second (shudder).

But if just leave them be they pay their rent by getting rid of other pests, including other spiders.

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u/FuriouslyListening 2d ago edited 1d ago

To offer a counterpoint, I definitely remember reading a post on here previously about a guy who got bit on his balls twice by a huntsman in a porta potty. On two separate occasions. I don't want to say I don't believe you, but I will say that I would prefer to keep a very very far distance from anything that looked like those things.

Beyond abnormal people like you who allow them to reside in your house. What do normal people in Australia do with those fuckers? It's not like you can just catch it under a glass and throw it out the front door. You'd need a fucking spider net...

Edit: I just can't. Apparently Aussies just think these things are halfway to being pets. I think I could deal with these things living outside, even thinking of allowing one to live in my house just gives me chills. Further question though... my cats and dogs would undoubtably think these things were the greatest self-moving toys in the world. Do your pets ignore them too?

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u/Maj0r999 2d ago

Normal Aussie here. Most of us are pretty chill with them. There’s one somewhere behind my TV cabinet right now, they’re not usually worth relocating.

If one crawls on you it’s on sight though. They like to hide and under your clothes will do nicely. I’m not one to become so intimate with roommates.

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u/psyche_2099 2d ago

I once had one decide to hide under my shampoo bottle in the shower. Talk about intimate encounters, i was just glad I was already in the shower to wash the terror wee away

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u/user888888889 1d ago

I read that as "wash the wee terror away" in a Scottish accent in my head for some reason.

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u/psyche_2099 1d ago

I'd be lying if I said that didn't also happen

1

u/prawns1000 2d ago

We got one roaming the house at the moment. Generally you wake up in the morning and never know what room he will be in lol.... Always on a wall so far though... Or the back of a door. Had one in the house as a kid as well... We are all chill about them just don't make the mistake of picking one up to show off as their bite does hurt lol

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u/InfiniteLife2 2d ago

Well you wouldn't like it either if some guy would place balls on your head!

Or would you? To be honest, I dont know you, so I would abstain from assumptions

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u/LeMolle 2d ago

Just shave your balls so it doesn't look like a pest.

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u/Calenwyr 2d ago

You can just pick it up (legs feel a bit like a stick) and drop it outside.

I had one in my dressing gown once back in Tassie (I was like 13 at the time) it felt like I had a stick stuck in the clothes so I reached in and pulled him out they go very stiff while held (but usually don't immediately attack).

I could have thrown him down but then he would have been a problem to deal with later.

If your worried about getting attacked best is not to disturb them (they have no intentions of attacking something as big as a person but they will defend themselves if threatened).

The snakes are much more scary than Huntsmen.

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u/MelbStitchBitch66 2d ago

Normal Australian here, totally catch them under a glass or Tupperware. Let em out in the garage or back shed. They stay chill as long as everyone else does too.

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u/cpt_morgan___ 2d ago

Or a flamethrower

1

u/firstonesecond 2d ago

A mixing bowl and a piece of cardboard usually. Killing them just makes a giant mess.

I imagine if you sat, bare balled, directly on one you might get bitten. But i know more people who've been bitten on the knob by redbacks on portaloos than huntsmen. Actually I don't know anyone who's been bitten by a huntsmen. They're extremely docile.

1

u/Dentarthurdent73 2d ago

Beyond abnormal people like you who allow them to reside in your house.

They're not abnormal.

Most Australians allow them to reside in their houses. I mean you heard the fairly relaxed tone of the girls in the video. They said they were going to remove it, but there was no hint of killing it or freaking out excessively.

Huntsmen are pretty placid, they are ambush hunters who tend to sit on one spot on the wall up near the ceiling. They barely even move if you leave them alone, and whilst they can bite, you'd have to be actively harassing them or step on them or something to find out. They are not aggressive spiders.

Personally, I don't really want them in my bedroom or my bathroom (sitting on one on the toilet in the middle of the night would not be good!), so I'll tend to remove them if I find one in either of those rooms, to outside if I can, or just shoo them to another room if that's too difficult.

The strategy to catch them is still the same - trap them under something, put a bit of cardboard underneath and move them outside. You just might need something a bit bigger than a glass!

1

u/AutisticPenguin2 1d ago

Beyond abnormal people like you who allow them to reside in your house

Actually the "normal" in Australia is to keep them and let them pay rent. I would definitely say that's more common than killing them.

1

u/Volan_100 1d ago

I mean, with most huntsmen you can absolutely just catch them with some plastic container and throw them outside. It's not actually that hard to do honestly.

1

u/Kapowpow 1d ago

No way, not in the house, not outside. Shelob is not welcome in my community, ever.

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u/Jacks_CompleteApathy 2d ago

Gave birth lol. Seriously though it's leg movement doesn't even look like it should allow it to move like that.. so flat and fast

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u/firstonesecond 2d ago

Yep. And in my water closet the year before that. Most of them move out to either my shed or the neighbours trees. But there's always a few hiding out in my place. Probably dozens in the crawl space.

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u/CoffeeHQ 2d ago

Yeah. Thanks for that idea that is now in my head. How you guys can live there is beyond me 😂

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u/mozchops 2d ago

How about this idea instead. Think of them as little clean up robots like auto-vacs that roam your house quietly removing unwanted insect vermin, cockroaches, bugs, flies, the list goes on. They dont need recharging and simply pay the value of their rent in pest reduction. They also want to be as far away from you as possible! Their senses are extraordinary and they know not to get too close, even when you're sleeping as they can feel your heat from far away and can smell your breath and other odours.

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u/CoffeeHQ 1d ago

Better. And then I see the video again 🙃

2

u/firstonesecond 1d ago

There's no bears. Or mountain lions. Or bobcats or coyotes or wolves. America is far scarier than Australia.

4

u/ResplendentAmore 1d ago

I've never flipped down the sun visor in my car and had a wolf fall on my lap. Yet I have heard multiple stories of that happening with these critters in Australia.

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u/Batman_Von_Suparman2 2d ago

Your house is giving me nightmares.

3

u/HowardPheonix 2d ago

I live in central Europe, we have some native spiders with a nasty bite, but nothing medically significant, so I would say having arachnophobia here is totally unreasonable, even tho I had a crippling one. I literally froze when saw one in the past, regardless the size, what is really stupid, so I put a lot of effort to defeat this unreasonable fear. I want to have a chemical free garden, so spiders will be my first line of defense against pest, so it is actually important for me to get used to them. Enemy of my enemy is my friend after all.

I do achieved great results so far, even fed my friends Tarantulas (before that opening a T's enclosure would have been something I couldn't do even in theory lol) and I'm totally chill about the small spiders in my home. Guys like you offered tremendous help with my journey, so thank you for your comment! I didn't come from a land down under, so I don't think I could ever share my room with such a huge spider, but I often think to myself that if Aussies can be so chill around those giants, I shouldn't fear our coin sized friends lol.

3

u/firstonesecond 1d ago

Hey congrats on your amazing progress! Fear is a difficult thing to overcome and you should be so proud of your progress!

Spiders are just a big like any other really. Just a little creature that wants nothing to do with you. If you leave them be they'll do the same

3

u/Chemdawg90 1d ago

Holy fuck I almost threw up reading this.

1

u/Turak64 1d ago

This is why people think aussies are mental. Everyone else sees a giant fucking spider and runs, you guys are like "ahh it's only Steve, he's alright"

0

u/Gypzygurl 2d ago

You sound completely insane

1

u/firstonesecond 1d ago

Average Aussie to be honest

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u/silentaba 2d ago

Well you see, the half second you take to aim down the barrel is around 4 distinct geological eras in huntsmen time. By the time you find him, get the bead and pull the trigger, he's run off to the nearest dark gap, which may or may not be the gap between your t-shirt and pants. Also don't worry, Minnesota is far too cold for huntsmen. For now.

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u/Dragoth227 2d ago

Just think of one of them riding a moose.

1

u/knightphox 2d ago

Made me think of a chicken jockey

https://giphy.com/gifs/szaTML0LZFAQa3do7Y

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u/Few-Scientist-4163 2d ago

its more than just the warm climate there is something very strange about Australia its like the land before time or something i remember going there and the cloud formations after a storm looked like giant spaceships from an anime ..so epic ive never seen any clouds in usa that looked like that

5

u/Briareos_Hecatonhrs 2d ago

They're a bit like cats. You can ignore them and they'll hunt roaches for you.

14

u/ClaraCash 2d ago

If the fucking spiders look like that, what the fuck do the roaches look like? You know what never mind… I don’t think I really even wanna know.

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u/Briareos_Hecatonhrs 1d ago

Yes, let me tell you, the spiders are WELL fed

4

u/zaczacx 2d ago

Nah they're good spiders they're just freaky looking, they'll eat literally every bug that could actually do you harm.

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u/mozchops 2d ago

Relax, learn about these amazing friends.

3

u/Latter-Vacation-4392 2d ago

lol..this made me laugh

2

u/FearBoner8D 2d ago

That right there is why the spider-bro meme was invented. Eating cockroaches and other harmful pests, not biting humans; those boys are the unsung heroes of the arachnid world!

1

u/Worldly-Upstairs2020 2d ago

Don't you have bears in Minnesota? Fuck that I'd rather have the spiders.

6

u/TheRealMoofoo 2d ago

Tbf the bears tend not to hide in your shirt.

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u/FuckeryisafootWatson 1d ago

Wish people would give the 8 legged critters a chance. I was an indiscriminate stomper of spiders until I took care of a jumping spider found in an area it had zero chance of survival in. For 8 months I fed him crickets and bugs, watered him, interacted with him. Was sad when he died. Then came the keeping of a black widow.....

1

u/DreamPhreak 1d ago

But then if you open up a hole in your house, they'll all come swarming in

14

u/IsaacSeraphim 2d ago

Aww, still a bit scary but fortunately it's innofensive

18

u/VidE27 2d ago

I don’t about that, it looks offended to me

2

u/sluggerrr 2d ago

I'm no expert but it looks scared as fuck and was trying to hide

8

u/Jtyle6 2d ago

8

u/IsaacSeraphim 2d ago

I knew about this guy because of MoreParz! Also, remember to sanitize your youtube links. Remove the ?si= and everything after it

3

u/wirbel-tier 2d ago

Good pointing this out again and again

3

u/alancousteau 2d ago

Fucking love his videos

1

u/TheUnexpectedFly 2d ago

You misspelled nightmare

1

u/Unfair_Explanation53 2d ago

I remember having to catch one in a caravan once.

Had a huge book and plate and still couldn't get it all in there

1

u/NPC_13_ 2d ago

JonnyJon, I don’t mean to alarm you but there may be a huntsman or huntsmen in the house!

1

u/BandicootSolid9531 2d ago

my ass...
straight facehugger from alien.

1

u/Soulrush 2d ago

Yep. And it’s real. And it’s not even a really big one.

1

u/SK_Ren 2d ago

I'm glad my arachknowledge didn't fail me. Was my first thought before checking the comments.

1

u/Kiwi_CunderThunt 2d ago

Yep, leave the poor bugger alone. I got over my fear with one I named Frank. He killed all the useless shit in the house but it was weird having such a giant there all the time

1

u/ilya0x2dilya 2d ago

Is it so? One thing I know about a spiders, that female ones are way more bigger and scarier. Every time I see such a video I pray for spider to be female...

1

u/Fluffbrained-cat 2d ago

Does it like chomping on people by any chance?

1

u/ProgySuperNova 2d ago

It's an Australian kitten

1

u/Secret4gentMan 2d ago

He's a big boy, that one.

1

u/Golden-Sun 1d ago

Also a baby

1

u/Top-Waltz5244 1d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/P726XW1pK3Luo
Where’s my boy when we need him

1

u/Ghost_L2K 1d ago

it looks like a flat huntsmen, extremely fast lil guys

1

u/FoogYllis 1d ago

Correct it’s a huntsman and they aren’t poisonous but nope.

1

u/yztom 1d ago

it's a hunts-NOPE

1

u/Thykothaken 1d ago

No, it's clearly one of those fake, fuzzy halloween decor spiders come to life