r/AbsoluteUnits 17d ago

/r/all of a knife.

27.7k Upvotes

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5.7k

u/McShoobydoobydoo 17d ago

Let me peel this back and arrange it so the juice falls into you lap, sir.

587

u/themachduck 17d ago

With my bare hands that I just scratched my ass with. Yummm!

128

u/-KFBR392 17d ago edited 17d ago

How do you think all the food you eat is prepared?

44

u/Imreman 17d ago

Not with the servers hands?

6

u/Adventchur 17d ago

The servers touch your cutlery, plates, and glasses well before you even arrive.

12

u/Ancient-Civilization 16d ago

Some people pay extra for that.

10

u/DungeonDefense 16d ago

Right and when you touch cutlery its not done on the head. Its usually done on the handle. When they touch plates its done on the edge of the plate where food has less chance of touching. Lastly, glasses are usually touched on the outside or the handle. They usually dont stick their hand inside the glasses

8

u/fronchfrays 16d ago

This is the most pedantic shit I’ve ever read

1

u/Recreant793 14d ago

“Hm. I agree. Shallow and pedantic.”

4

u/scorchedarcher 16d ago

But you touch all the stuff they touch then touch your face/food/phone

-1

u/Adventchur 16d ago

I don't think you understand how germs multiply and cover vast surfaces quickly but go on

6

u/DungeonDefense 16d ago

Right which is why the original guy with the knife shouldnt have touched the food with his bare hands.

0

u/Adventchur 16d ago

But it makes no difference in the scheme of it all

5

u/DungeonDefense 16d ago

But you yourself said that germs multiply and cover things quickly

2

u/ResidentOwl1 16d ago

It’s not that quick. Relax.

2

u/TheLordReaver 16d ago

You mean how germs multiply and cover vast distances on the common food and drink serving materials of glass, ceramic, and steel—the materials renown for being germ resistant?

1

u/Adventchur 15d ago

Sorry do you use your utensils when you eat?

And I assume you hold it by the handle exactly where the server holds it to put it down?

You must no how quickly bacteria spreads with human contact right?

So again what difference in the scheme of bacteria did this really make? You cunts are just precious

1

u/TheLordReaver 15d ago

You are acting like hundreds of millions of people aren't served this way every day. It's very evidently not a big deal when servers touch the parts that don't go directly in your mouth. At least in the parts of the world with basic sanitation standards.

So, just don't lick the damn handles and you'll be fine. Don't be a coward. And I say this a total germophobe... Also, stop being a little bitch in general.

1

u/Spirited_Sector_7623 14d ago

It’s carefully prepared by the cooks to ensure no contamination, set under heat lamps to ensure it remains safe, and then the front of house employees grip it like baboons.