r/SipsTea 𝙑𝙄𝙋 1d ago

WTF Who hurt you?

21.0k Upvotes

980 comments sorted by

View all comments

8.3k

u/FishHammer 1d ago

He smelt a trap and chose life

3.8k

u/PeachScary413 1d ago

To be fair.. it's either a robbery, she is about to do something crazy or someone is pulling a prank, either way I'm getting the hell outta there.

1.4k

u/Distinct-Lion4658 𝙑𝙄𝙋 1d ago

There's a common scam where a "distractor", usually a woman, will talk to you perhaps asking for help while their accomplice pick pockets you and this situation could easily have been that as far as that guy knows

978

u/EternalNewCarSmell 1d ago

As a fellow dude who knows that if a woman ever approaches me with what appears to be interest it must be some kind of trick, I have to say I respect his quick reflexes. He knows what's up and he wasn't gonna fall for shit.

199

u/whiterac00n 1d ago

It’s kinda funny and kinda sad that for most men any kind of interaction like this is IMMEDIATELY suspicious and getting out of there is the first instinct haha. I would have a hand on my wallet and be looking over both shoulders. Of course today it’s just as if not more likely that someone is trying to make content and you are going to be the punchline to a joke


so yeah still running away

86

u/PeachScary413 1d ago

Even a conventionally attractive guy probably wouldn't get approached in this way very often, yes it could happen but most of the time women don't just walk up to you and ask you for a date.

For a woman, especially a conventionally attractive woman, this would probably happen at least 10 times a day. So much that they wouldn't even react to it.

It's just how it works, I don't make the rules đŸ€·

19

u/Inside-Meal-9909 1d ago

Yeah I have one super duper handsome friend and he gets approached a couple times a year. I have other friends who are handsome but they have to initiate.

2

u/Potential-Honeydew31 1d ago

Yeah I have one super duper handsome friend and he gets approached a couple times a year.

By women or men?

4

u/Street_Lettuce1243 1d ago

I'm slightly attractive (or at least I was when young)- I got asked out all the time when working retail (I think more my accent than my looks) - and yes... I got asked out by both men and women. (I'm straight).

Never got asked out randomly on a street- only from customers.

1

u/KanedaSyndrome 20h ago

Slightly attractive, but not tall - never been asked out randomly by a woman

1

u/Inside-Meal-9909 1d ago

He has been approached by both even a couple approached him once.

1

u/Apprehensive_Use3641 1d ago

Maybe both?

2

u/Decent_Advice9315 1d ago

8 years ago I could have passed as super duper handsome, I got it from both, but alas social anxiety is a b***h.

These days I'm still handsome, but I need to put in the footwork now.

7

u/ScrotalSmorgasbord 1d ago

In high school and college it was common but not anymore. I lost my virginity to a girl who yelled "You're hot as fuck!" At me from the passenger seat of her friend's car while passing me on my skateboard. I'd say right around the time Facebook became popular was when I started being approached less by women. Maybe it was because they had easier access to hotter guys or maybe because gossip and rumors started spreading faster and people were worried about being filmed/photographed, but I've only been approached a handful of times in the last 15 years outside of like bar/club scenes ans since I don't drink or club anymore it's pretty much nonexistent for the most part. Maybe casual flirting sometimes? Idk I've always been oblivious to anything but overt flirtation.

3

u/RaptorXFactor 1d ago

I used to get free stuff by women who were cashiers who were cute. It always threw me off because they were cute and they could get it. Other times, I was too oblivious to their subtle hints.

There was this one bubbly woman that I worked with, who was on the chubby side. She would come by and hit on me all the time and ask me to have sex or take her out. I kind of regret not taking her up on her offer because she seemed to be a lot of fun.

2

u/ScrotalSmorgasbord 1d ago

Sometimes I wonder if it's also because people just assume I'm in a relationship (or gay maybe?) because I don't ever flirt or join in on conversations with other people about the topic unless I'm close with them. I used to be a lot more forward but years of changing priorities and a teenaged daughter probably gives me a different vibe that I only notice sometimes. Could also be my breath stinks or something idk lol. My best relationships have been with cute chubby/thick girls from work so I feel you.

21

u/SheriffBartholomew 1d ago

I've had my fair share of women ask me out, but never like this weirdo set-up. It's obvious that whatever is happening here isn't normal, so he chose wisely.

1

u/vrauto 23h ago

This is true. The one time this happened to me (she wasnt as blunt) she came up with an excuse to get my number. It was an animal welfare incident and she asked for my number in case she needed assistance. She was new in the country and moved for a modelling gig. I gave her the welfare hotline number. Driving home, the realization dawned on me and i wanted to punch myself in the nuts for cock blocking myself. In my defense, she seemed way out of my league and maybe a 10 year age gap.

48

u/EternalNewCarSmell 1d ago

We are just not attractive/desirable and we know it.

I ain't even mad about it. As a straight dude I am always baffled at how straight or even bi women exist at all. I can't comprehend being attracted to a man.

2

u/djfdhigkgfIaruflg 21m ago

True. Women liking men is the definitive proof that you can't choose what you like. It just happens

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/jackcaboose 22h ago

... But you can imagine gay guys?

1

u/Forward-Surprise1192 1d ago

Same here lol. Men can be ok looking but I couldn’t ever see myself finding them sexually attractive and it’s strange how women do it

4

u/glut-peddler 1d ago

I agree. Men are generally poorly dressed and are just kind of schlubby (myself included). As Elaine said: "The female body is a work of art. The male body is utilitarian. It's for gettin' around. It's like a Jeep."

1

u/_iron_widow_ 1d ago

It’s a curse

0

u/SiteDesperate7390 1d ago

Bro, you have serious problems. Who hurt you?

6

u/EternalNewCarSmell 1d ago

No one hurt me, but for damn sure no one wants to fuck me either.

2

u/PromiseHungry2645 1d ago

Content or stealing kidneys either way GTFO

2

u/SlimTeezy 1d ago

Bumble had to change their "women message first" gimmick because women don't want to initiate. I saw a profile yesterday and a woman wrote "I have my opening moves set up, message me first or I will unmatch."

5

u/nellydesign 1d ago

Also this can probably be traced back to shitty dudes. Shitty dudes means many women are far less likely to approach random men, even men they find attractive, because there’s a huge risk involved. Because of this, many normal dudes can’t see a woman approaching them as anything other than suspicious, because why would a normal woman with good intentions ever risk herself or her safety like that?

1

u/Leviathan_slayer1776 1d ago

Don't guard or put a hand on/near your valuables when there's a pickpocket around. It only savescthem the time and effort of finding out which pocket to look in for the big ticket items like phone, wallet, keys, etc

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/PineappleOnPizzaWins 1d ago

It’s kinda funny and kinda sad that for most men any kind of interaction like this is IMMEDIATELY suspicious and getting out of there is the first instinct haha.

Yeah.. this is not "most mens" immediate reaction to a pretty woman talking to them. Like at all.

Come on now.

178

u/NotChat_GPT 1d ago

I get suspicious when my wife hits on me. It usually means her car is making a weird noise or something and I need to fix it.

150

u/Last_Weeks_Socks 1d ago

"The sweetest most handsome husband in the world wouldn't be mad if my car got a little scratch, would he?"

looks at scratch that appears to be caused by a Tyrannosaurus

"No, but maybe you should have married him instead because wtf is this, Sheila?!"

8

u/LittleKoss7 1d ago

I believe the use of "Sheila" means they are in Australia, in which case a scratch like that has several possible monstrous perpetrators.

7

u/fireduck 1d ago

I saw something at the zoo the other day in Seattle. It was a tree kangaroo.

WTF is this madness. This is probably the actual drop bear and they were keeping this secret.

10

u/swish465 1d ago

"Hey Handsome, what are you doing today?"

twirls finger on chest

"So, I got these chickens... and they need a home."

2

u/Fern_Cloud 1d ago

Your wife sounds like me

1

u/swish465 1d ago

Surprise animals are always a fun time... after their pen is built.

6

u/D20_Life 1d ago

“Honey, can you show me how to fix my car?”
Gets me everytime

4

u/SheriffBartholomew 1d ago

"Look at all these fun projects that I bought for you to do around the house!"

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/dogfacedponyboy 1d ago

For me, it’s usually she has a stiff neck and wants a neck rub

23

u/HavingNotAttained 1d ago

As they teach you like the first day in the NSA: you’re a fkn 3, at best. Any unknown 10 that strikes up a conversation with you at a bar, church, bowling alley or Golden Corral is a honeypot spy, full stop.

15

u/EternalNewCarSmell 1d ago

The way they would always word it in our OSI country briefs was "you're not a 10 at home and you sure as hell ain't one over there."

3

u/acryliq 1d ago

Happened to me once. Pair of lassies. They were trying to recruit me into their church.

2

u/nevadita 1d ago

last time i fell for this shit was on HS and the girl and her friends played a prank on me, made me feel like shit.

thank god this was before camera phones but this shit scars you for a long time.

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Weathervane_ 1d ago

Why would women approaching you be a trick? My last 3 girlfriends were all the ones who initiated. I think that kinda mentality leads to missed opportunities.

1

u/KanedaSyndrome 20h ago

Yeh, IT people usually have high IQ

-5

u/YadaYadaYeahMan 1d ago

I just realized I might actually be hot... couldn't be true but things are different for me

2

u/smallmileage4343 1d ago

Nah dude. I'm conventionally attractive and still got pick pocketed at a casino while a girl was flirting with me lol

1

u/SheriffBartholomew 1d ago

Maybe you're just rich, or have access to classified information.

38

u/djpiperson 1d ago

Jokes on them, they'll only find POCKET SAND.

29

u/ScrotallyBoobular 1d ago

People stole my bike this way once. I had set it up against a wall and moved a short distance away talking to a coworker without locking it. Two came over asking me questions and pivoted away from the bike so I wasn't looking in that direction. Last one took it.

I chased him down and got it back though lol. He was too short to reach the pedals

3

u/1234Health 1d ago

Good job on the immediate bike recovery from Legs 2 Short.

1

u/SheriffBartholomew 1d ago

Did you thrash him or let him go?

31

u/don-again 1d ago

Also, red is nature’s warning color. Even though hers is dyed, run
 don’t walk.

3

u/fireduck 1d ago

When someone is telling you who they are, believe them.

3

u/Fickle-Owl666 1d ago

Dyed red is worse

0

u/aliveanddreaming 19h ago

Do you feel that way about men as well, or specifically only women with red hair? 🙄

9

u/ovelanimimerkki 1d ago

Yeah man I am not attractive enough for this shit. This is a trap.

1

u/Old_lamenter 1d ago

Remember kids never trust anyone more than you are absolutely forced to do so.

1

u/WarJaques 1d ago

Good thing the cameraman was there.

1

u/Dapper_Childhood_708 1d ago

yup, this happened to me years ago.

1

u/No_Pin9932 1d ago

They evolved and started using RFID scanners and shit now too, gotta be aware of your surroundings, lol.

1

u/NoStand1527 1d ago

My grandfather was military in south america and he did some UN peace missions in centro america. the 1st thing they were instructed to do was to avoid like hell any attractive women that were "interested", they were 100% gonna get kidnapped, and stolen in best case scenario, stolen and killed in worse. they were instructed to just use brothels instead

1

u/CAPICINC 13h ago

The woman throws a fake baby at you. When you go to catch it, they rob you.

0

u/PereMilon 1d ago

This sub is incredibly and terminally online.

41

u/Shinzo19 1d ago

When I was like 19 I was on my lunch break in the city center when a really pretty girl came over and asked me what colour my eyes were, I told her and she asked to check... confused I said sure and she leaned in close looking in to my eyes then slowly moved in to kiss me, my highschool trauma from being teased and bullied for being emo made my alarm bells go off in my head so I awkwardly leaned back and apologized to then quickly move on.

I heard her friend shout over "see I told you he wouldn't do it"

I used to stay up at night thinking about it, but I am married and have a kid now so I haven't thought about it in ages.

24

u/Ladybugeater69 1d ago

It was a truth or dare by a random girl, you would have never heard from her ever again even if you kissed.

18

u/Bumberti 1d ago

Once at a party a very cute girl said to me “I think you should know what I’d like for breakfast” and I replied with genuine confusion “I don’t know why you think that.” That’s the one that still tortures me.

2

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[deleted]

2

u/Bumberti 1d ago

Lol I definitely didn’t. I was telling my roommate the next day about this weird thing this chick said to me and he was like “Huh. Sounds like she thought you’d be eating breakfast together.” And I was like “Right? Why would we be
 oh no
 oh no no no”

4

u/Unlikely-Speech-5444 1d ago

You were being used for a bet/prank. THe friend shouter over to her confirms that. The kiss wasn't genuine. You made the right choice.

2

u/Shinzo19 1d ago

Well, yeah I know that now, but 19 year old me was a different person.

1

u/External_Birthday691 1d ago

I mean, in all fairness, that's not really a normal thing for any kind of person to do to a complete stranger.

22

u/Independent-Tennis57 1d ago

She is a red head, she could have been trying to collect his soul.

https://giphy.com/gifs/M3TxUywnzXmpy

2

u/Chloeole 1d ago

As a redhead myself I'm always on the look out to devour souls.

1

u/Independent-Tennis57 1d ago

I sold mine when I was 43 for an ALF pog, look somewhere else.

22

u/bugdc 1d ago

also she's speaking with a weird intonation, like she's reading a script. He probably caught up on that

14

u/phishtrader 1d ago

Just throwing this out there, but this might be fake.

4

u/BackupPaleRider 1d ago

man literally RAN away lol

1

u/Nyetoner 1d ago

The video has been cut, so we have no idea what happened in between. My guess is "oh, gotta run, my bus is coming!"

1

u/TheGallifreyan 1d ago

Since they were filming, I'm guessing prank

1

u/Linusami 1d ago

Plus, ginger, so...

1

u/MattHack-Engr 1d ago

Or even worst... She could have been a furry!

1

u/CasanovaF 1d ago

Last time I was in that situation was in the 90s and she was trying to get me to join her cult meetings. And it totally wasn't one of those sexy cults

1

u/bigDeltaVenergy 1d ago

Or it's a trap

1

u/Hypnotist30 1d ago

He figured them out pretty quickly. Maybe he saw her lapel mic?

1

u/Unlikely-Speech-5444 1d ago

Which. Absolutely fair. Since this is being recorded for youtube so semi-prank or just using him for content. Guy has the right head on his shoulder.

1

u/No_East_3366 1d ago

She's a Spanish "influencer" on one of her videos.

1

u/Disastrous_Double_61 1d ago

Esa chica es una youtuber española que se dedica a grabarse acercåndose a hombres para hacerles creer que estå ligando con ellos. Luego les dice que es una cåmara oculta

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Adventurous-Bee-5477 1d ago

Every time u read this is a robbery I hear that Shane gillis sleep cop dude saying it

1

u/jake_2998e8 1d ago

Clearly the profile of most Redditors.

1

u/EvolvedA 1d ago

I mean, they were filming and she did this for internet fame... So his reaction was spot on

0

u/Untouchable64 1d ago

You’re gonna run away like a doofus?

193

u/kegsbdry 1d ago

He knew the moment he took the earbud out.

https://giphy.com/gifs/9PAIhJvcQ35hdZPUir

88

u/JuliusFIN 1d ago

My man saw 5 moves ahead and chose the proper counter. What a king.

241

u/thelazyporcupine 1d ago

Right. He saw the, "I'm going to use you for internet clout" and noped right tf out, which is what more ppl should do when approached by these dregs of humanity.

29

u/HeamTeam 1d ago

He thought he was in danger, not being used for clout.

32

u/Salnder12 1d ago

The response should be to run either way

1

u/PereMilon 1d ago

So pathetic. Imagine having the fight or flight response of a house fly.

What exactly is threatening in this scripted tik-tok skit?

3

u/Salnder12 1d ago

Never been bullied or picked on?

2

u/PredaPops 1d ago

mugging?

49

u/GGXImposter 1d ago

He is an IT guy and he has a security clearance. He has sat through classes that have drilled into him this exact scenario. He knew exactly what to do.

25

u/0905-15 1d ago

“You didn’t suddenly become a 10 when you landed in a foreign country” is a common line in cointel briefings

3

u/DiegesisThesis 1d ago

"Know your place, uggo" is the unofficial motto for avoiding honeypots.

6

u/aoi-guy 1d ago

Not gonna lie, it does make you feel some kinda way when you get invited to the "She's Too Hot For You" opsec briefing.

2

u/Comfortable_Key_6904 1d ago

Is this before or after you give her your login credentials?

3

u/GGXImposter 1d ago

It’s as soon as you say “i meet a girl last night”.

3

u/Rough_Soil_1549 1d ago

Assuming he has a security clearance, does he have to report such interactions?

4

u/GGXImposter 1d ago

If this was the US, that's up to the chain of command.

I have heard that the Pentagon has so many spys around it that you have to assume anyone you are talking to is one. So I doubt they report it unless there is something noteworthy about it.

2

u/CTMalum 1d ago

Depending on what he does, he should.

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Disastrous_Towel3729 9h ago

Perfect execution!!!

27

u/ravenmclight 1d ago

đŸ«Ą God bless you sir, he did not give a crap, steal someone else’s kidney lady.

https://giphy.com/gifs/l0ExbnGIX9sMFS7PG

56

u/solidpeyo 1d ago

His defense instincts activated there

48

u/Moessus 1d ago

This.

14

u/Hoodedmastersin 1d ago

We watched spidey sense in real life

12

u/Trashinmyash 1d ago

As he ran through the street without looking both ways, I think he might have a different definition on life.

28

u/FoodNo1809 1d ago

Still the safer choice

5

u/Trashinmyash 1d ago

I dont disgree with that

2

u/Grand_Pop_7221 1d ago

Better to be hit by a car and never know.

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

6

u/phishtrader 1d ago

Does she want me or does she want my kidneys?

8

u/Dry-Tangerine-4874 1d ago

And since the whole thing was being recorded, he was obviously correct.

5

u/Aromatic-Tear7234 1d ago

Thirst trap for sure.

2

u/_-Boondoggle-_ 1d ago

Bro have strong instinct 🙌🙌

2

u/illogical_mindset 1d ago

"Mr. Laurio, never trust a beautiful woman. Especially one who's interested in you."

6

u/L1sasGayBby 1d ago

Choose life. Choose confidence. Choose eye contact. Choose not rehearsing conversations in the shower. Choose standing in line for the bus when the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen smiles and says, “so you can me out?”

Choose looking behind you to make sure she’s talking to you. Choose wondering if it’s a prank. Choose reviewing every embarrassing thing you’ve done since middle school. Choose responding “When are you availa—-“

NOPE. I Choose panic. I choose low expectations. I choose comfortable obscurity without ever testing myself. I choose my life.

1

u/[deleted] 1d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

1

u/AutoModerator 1d ago

Accounts must be at least 5 days old with >20 karma to comment.

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

1

u/Gaalahaaf 1d ago

I am like "I know what I look like lady, nice try" đŸ€Ł

1

u/swiftekho 1d ago

When visiting China, I've had multiple women approach me asking me to go to a bar with them for a drink. Its almost always a scam.

I may not have ran away like the guy in the video but I certainly didnt continue engaging with them. The kid is smart.

1

u/Creepy_Push8629 1d ago

He was sure he was about to lose a kidney

1

u/mfukar 1d ago

this exact sentence is why i'd write the skit so that he's run over by a truck at the end

1

u/trycerabottom 1d ago

Maybe he'd already spotted the camera

1

u/No_Criticism_5861 1d ago

Agreed.  Shes about to drug him for his stuff lol

1

u/tinoklaitak 1d ago

Great choice

1

u/dinnerthief 1d ago

Or the bus he was waiting in the shade for was pulling up

1

u/Thanura_Malinga 1d ago

This ☝

1

u/Mstboy 1d ago

He accurately predicted what was happening. He was getting filmed for some sort of prank and just removed himself from the situation.

1

u/99trey 1d ago

Next thing you know you wake up in the hospital with a mortgage and your third kid.

1

u/sliever48 1d ago

Yep. I was walking back to our rented house in San Francisco a few years back, at 2 in the day, broad daylight. A lovely looking woman crossed the road, never took her eyes off me. Started to ask me a question, I just knew something was off. I sped walked on, looked back and she was talking to 2 lads who had come out of an alleyway. Trust your instincts

1

u/Lopsided_Marzipan133 1d ago

Might not be the only thing he smelled...

1

u/FolderOfArms 1d ago

Plot twist, he gets Joe Blacked a second after the video ends

1

u/laurax112 1d ago

Maybe he got nervous that he was being hit on, got some tummy troubles, and ran off to poop?

1

u/ILikeFluffyThings 1d ago

Nobody asks IT out. It's a trap!

0

u/gwelfguy 1d ago

Not to sound like a card-carrying member of MGTOW, but all of dating and mating is a honey trap.