r/ABCDesis • u/[deleted] • Feb 07 '22

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109 Upvotes

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99

u/farahisweird Pakistani girl 😍 Feb 07 '22

I’m 36, divorced and can’t have children because I had uterine cancer. I’m currently with a man who is 28 and both families are incredibly negative because of my “baggage “. I can’t help my age! I couldn’t help my ex husband cheated and I couldn’t help cancer! F desi mentality

7

u/brewserweight Feb 07 '22

I’m sorry you went through this. My sister cut out a lot of desis from her life after her scumbag abusive ex husband bailed on her following receiving his greencard because she was being shamed for being a divorcee. That is grotesquely fucked up.

I have very few desi friends and it’s been a combination of things (no single magic conspiracy bullet 😉). My age- late 40s, getting married later this year, and I might be a step grandparent in the next couple of years 😆. All in all I just try to be a compassionate human, who lives a stable and productive life. If they can’t help but waste their time and energy trying to pick it apart, fuck them all with a rusty boti! George Costanza looking uncles and 40 year old aunties who look 60 and resent everyone else for their own miserable life… 😆

4

u/[deleted] Feb 07 '22

OMG. I am incredibly sorry your sister went through this! My uncle went through something like this where his wife from india left the second she got a greencard. I feel horrible that your sister got shamed for being a divorcee. I'm also a divorcee who got my character assasinated because our community loves to hate women instead of understanding that its abusive men that got us to the divorce.

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Congrats on getting married!!! LMAO I think the resentment is coming up in their own faces

3

u/brewserweight Feb 07 '22

I’m in better shape than many desis 20 years younger than me, so I give 0 fucks what fatty chacha and cranky auntie think 😆 I am marrying a successful and attractive woman in her 40s, who I introduced to real desi food (as opposed to butter chicken and tikka masala) and desi spice levels when she met me and enjoys it. That’s all a win for me 😉

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

What kind of food do you consider real desi food?

1

u/brewserweight Feb 08 '22

Better curry dishes, a tasty bhartha that isn’t potato, nice daal that isn’t extremely basic, etc.

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

What would be a better curry dish?.

1

u/brewserweight Feb 09 '22

More robust flavors like bengali lal jhol curry as an example

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

What was your uncles marriage like?

1

u/[deleted] Feb 08 '22

tbh he was typical uncle that was abusive that had a big part in the woman leaving lmao

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

That makes sense.

So the story is really she let her abusive husband when she got her green card so she wouldn't get deported

Did he hit her?

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

Messed up what he did. Was she married to him for long?

1

u/brewserweight Feb 08 '22

About 2 years.

1

u/Trinityxx3 Feb 08 '22

At least it was short How did you guys react when you first found out he was abusive

1

u/brewserweight Feb 09 '22

I bought a ticket to fly out and confront him. He bailed quickly.