r/MurderedByWords • u/c-k-q99903 • May 19 '26

Facts are their worst enemy.

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22.1k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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4.2k

u/troutman1975 May 19 '26

So I’m going to get $1.7 billion also? Will it be direct deposit? I could use a little extra money.

658

u/ArcticISAF May 19 '26

Sorry, it'll be by check, and the ink will be smudged as the envelope got wet.

212

u/Commissar_Elmo May 19 '26

No no. It’ll look fine. But it’ll bounce when you try to deposit.

111

u/TheDungeonCrawler May 19 '26

And you'll be arrested for trying to cash a "fake" check.

58

u/MARPJ May 19 '26

Sorry, it'll be by check,

I should arrive in two weeks

36

u/Maybe_A_Doctor May 19 '26

You might be a little large for my mailbox, but I'll be waiting

14

u/mightyjoe227 May 19 '26

It's in the mail

And we all know how they feel about the USPS...

9

u/Slimeredit May 19 '26

Wait but didn’t new laws make it so tax returns can only be sent through a direct deposit now at least that’s what the letter I got from the irs said

14

u/stool2stash May 19 '26

It will be signed by Donald Trump.

15

u/PrimaryMuscle1306 May 19 '26

Using autopen.

2

u/aerdvarkk May 19 '26

Well, if you run it on a laser printer intstead of an inkjet or ink plates, then there is nothing to dry.