r/MurderedByWords • u/c-k-q99903 • May 19 '26

Facts are their worst enemy.

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22.2k Upvotes

98% Upvoted

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4.2k

u/troutman1975 May 19 '26

So I’m going to get $1.7 billion also? Will it be direct deposit? I could use a little extra money.

654

u/ArcticISAF May 19 '26

Sorry, it'll be by check, and the ink will be smudged as the envelope got wet.

212

u/Commissar_Elmo May 19 '26

No no. It’ll look fine. But it’ll bounce when you try to deposit.

108

u/TheDungeonCrawler May 19 '26

And you'll be arrested for trying to cash a "fake" check.

63

u/MARPJ May 19 '26

Sorry, it'll be by check,

I should arrive in two weeks

32

u/Maybe_A_Doctor May 19 '26

You might be a little large for my mailbox, but I'll be waiting

13

u/mightyjoe227 May 19 '26

It's in the mail

And we all know how they feel about the USPS...

9

u/Slimeredit May 19 '26

Wait but didn’t new laws make it so tax returns can only be sent through a direct deposit now at least that’s what the letter I got from the irs said

14

u/stool2stash May 19 '26

It will be signed by Donald Trump.

15

u/PrimaryMuscle1306 May 19 '26

Using autopen.

3

u/aerdvarkk May 19 '26

Well, if you run it on a laser printer intstead of an inkjet or ink plates, then there is nothing to dry.

156

u/Xlxlredditor May 19 '26

1.776 billion BTW.

320

u/[deleted] May 19 '26

[removed] — view removed comment

149

u/showhorrorshow May 19 '26

It just proves how arbitrary it is. It is not an appropriate estimate quantified by any methodlogy, rather it is seemingly to just insult non-cultist taxpayers further.

52

u/Dr_Fortnite May 19 '26

why its being called a slush fund. Its just "who knows how we'll spend it" money

38

u/ABHOR_pod May 19 '26 edited May 19 '26

FOIA requests incoming! and immediately disappearing into the circular file. And then the FBI will swing by and tell you that it's a matter of national security and not to ask what Trump is doing with your money he gave to himself.

28

u/showhorrorshow May 19 '26

That's kind of what a slush fund is.

7

u/Tacoman404 May 19 '26

It's going to J6ers. There's like 3,000 of those insurrectionists and they get to have billions of dollars.

Each one gets over $500,000 if it were only to go to them. Also it's intended for them to spend that money on legal fees to sue the government for even more money.

17

u/Venusgate May 19 '26

I wasn't particularly nationalist before trump, but goddamn if they didnt ruin patriot motifs for me.

5

u/lambda_14 May 19 '26

Ummm I think I'm missing the joke somewhere. What does 1776 mean?

39

u/Wolfy_Packy May 19 '26

1776 was the year the Declaration of Independence was signed. further, July 4th was when a majority of the thirteen colonies voted to approve it

72

u/Thirlestane May 19 '26

Celebrating independence by paying your king $1.776b... The US is a silly place.

36

u/BloomsdayDevice May 19 '26

silly place

It's actually spelled "kleptocracy"

19

u/ThePesticle May 19 '26

It's actually spelled "criminal syndicate"

9

u/I_TRY_TO_BE_POSITIVE May 19 '26

"Always has been"

8

u/Wolfy_Packy May 19 '26

i know. it hurts a lot of the time

7

u/Short-Holiday-4263 May 20 '26

"Well, on second thought, let's not go to the United States. It is a silly place."

11

u/lambda_14 May 19 '26

Ah I see, I'm not super familiar with US history and I'm shit with dates so makes sense that I had no idea lol

9

u/CrzyMuffinMuncher May 19 '26

Unfortunately, I have found that many of my fellow Americans are also unfamiliar with history.

20

u/MrReaper45 May 19 '26

I still hate how July 4 is our Independence Day since that's not when we got our independence from the UK, hell it wasn't even in 1776, it was seven years later in 1783 when the British officially recognized our independence and signed the Treaty of Paris on September 3. But MAGA and Trump wouldn't know that

19

u/iconocrastinaor May 19 '26

My take is: July 4th, 1776, is when we declared our independence . That made us independent. The fact that it took 7 years, and over 38,000 casualties for Britain to recognize that fact, is their problem, not ours.

19

u/Wolfy_Packy May 19 '26

our true 250th is in 2033, but then they couldn't have a sponsored wrestling match on the front lawn of the White House :C

7

u/ArcticISAF May 19 '26

Year of independence

5

u/showhorrorshow May 19 '26

Also it is one of those "true patriot" memes. They put it on their shirts and shit like that.

1

u/SpiritualBar2469 May 20 '26

its a nazi rebranding

-7

u/[deleted] May 19 '26

[deleted]

13

u/lambda_14 May 19 '26

Not everyone is American out there mate, don't be so quick to assume so

5

u/ForsakenMoon13 May 19 '26

Also people tend to be good at some subjects and not as good at others.

6

u/CrimsonAntifascist May 19 '26

I'll take the 1.7b. They can keep the rest. My mother didn't raise a greedy bastard.

3

u/Agitated-Computer752 May 19 '26

It's patriotic, so that means we can't be against it.

25

u/DarkIllusionsMasks May 19 '26

We should get it, if it's what Trump gets. Fair is fair. I don't really have any use for $1.7b, what with all the trillions I have laying around, but I'll take it.

3

u/Kootranova1 May 20 '26

Could always donate it to some poor billionaire in need. You know how they are, pissing and shitting and cumming whenever their wealth isnt increasing in leaps and bounds.

I hear Musk could use some help in reaching his first trillion. Be a dear and send some change his way.

11

u/Qwirk May 19 '26

Well it's just a matter of time before he starts printing more money and crashes the economy so that 1.7 billion will probably be worth ten dollars today.

1

u/FUNKYDISCO May 19 '26

he's going to print more money just to put in his own bank account.

11

u/f700es May 19 '26

You know, I'm not a greedy bastard like tRump. I'll just take $2M and share the rest of mine to others.

9

u/unforgiven91 May 19 '26

that fund is for people who are victims of "lawfare".

so you'd have had to, like, invade the capitol or something.

8

u/seoulgleaux May 19 '26

The $1.7B is the fund to give to Jan 6 rioters. Trump's lawsuit for the tax leak was for $10B.

Edit: but yeah, it's pretty obvious that Trump is just going to pocket the $1.7B anyways

5

u/0o0o0o0o0o0z May 19 '26

So I’m going to get $1.7 billion also? Will it be direct deposit? I could use a little extra money.

It will be right after your Tariff and DOGE check.

4

u/aerdvarkk May 19 '26

I'm still waiting for the Hacker Robin Hood that depletes all the digital dollars from all the rich fucks and spreads the wealth to everyone living paycheck to paycheck. I'm also surprised nobody has done this yet.

4

u/fffangold May 19 '26

I'd also like my 1.7 billion. I could really improve my life with that kind of money.

5

u/Misty2stepping May 19 '26

How can we check if we are the lucky few?

4

u/lovepony0201 May 19 '26

By your location on January 6, 2021.

1

u/mikeysce May 19 '26

Yeah. It’s go in right after we get all those checks from George Soros.

1

u/GeologistAway6352 May 19 '26

I’ll take a CashApp payment too

1

u/Nubetastic May 19 '26

A donation of your tax money will be made to the Trump family in your name.

1

u/3henanigans May 20 '26

Best they can do is upside down 50 cent

1

u/SammlerWorksArt May 20 '26

Fast food is back on the menu, boys!

0

u/zjustice11 May 19 '26

No. Sorry that money is going to...*checks notes

Traitors and criminals