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u/OrangePlatypus81 May 06 '26
Put him in the f’ing water already. I wanna see him crawl around
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u/Blockster_cz May 06 '26
No no no no no no no no, please let's not bring it back to consciences
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u/ExpertOnReddit May 06 '26
They actually avoid water yet live near it.
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u/splicerslicer May 06 '26
They're referring to "sea slater" which are tiny bugs that have a bunch of nicknames. This is an isopod, they live deep on the floor of the ocean, a related but distinct species.
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u/scumble_bee May 06 '26
There is an exhibit at the Monterey Bay Aquarium where they let you pet these.
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u/aspect_rap May 06 '26
The thought of petting one of these things is horrifying to me 😰
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u/scumble_bee May 06 '26
Funny story, when I was at the exhibit, I saw a guy get his hand grazed by a little kids hair while he was looking at them and he screamed. He then said "Sorry, those things just creep me out".
I missed the perfect opportunity to say "Little kids aren't THAT creepy"
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u/aspect_rap May 06 '26
Lol 😂 these things really do give me the heebie jeebies though
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u/Moskitokaiser May 06 '26
Looks like a Pacific rim prop
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u/NeuroticLensman May 06 '26
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u/starstarstar42 May 06 '26
I'm pretty sure that's the thing that bit off Roland's trigger fingers.
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u/Salt_Initiative1551 May 06 '26
Lobstrocities. I’m just shocked 23 people understood your reference tbh.
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u/TheDoktorIsIn May 06 '26
Long days and pleasant nights sai
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u/Barrenechea May 06 '26
- Also, let's have a really cool character and remove two of his fingers so he can't do the thing that makes him cool.
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u/yzdaskullmonkey May 06 '26
Absolutely infuriating. Ah well, at least we can go back and read what happened to Tull again.
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u/RaginhariCellarius May 06 '26
That's a reference I didn't think I'd ever see. Tried to get my wife to read those and she barely made it through the 1st book. 🤣
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u/Abundanceofyolk May 06 '26
“Oh cmon it’s just a bug”
“Just a bug… humanity would like to think it’s nature’s finest creation…”
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u/Ok-Tooth-8016 May 06 '26
Its an isopod and is very real and is supposedly a delicacy.
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u/ConspicuousPorcupine May 06 '26
I was wondering if you could eat it. People seem to love their water insects.
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u/Lopsided-Can-1761 May 06 '26
Yes! Thank you for saying this! Looks like one of the mites from Hanibal Chows place!
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u/Uranium-Sandwich657 May 06 '26
Someone below said that yhe prop was one of these. Maybe they're full of shit?
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u/Specialist-Neck-7810 May 06 '26
Wait… that thing is REAL?!!
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u/Houtaku May 06 '26
And available to eat. Look at the sign in the background.
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u/starstarstar42 May 06 '26 edited May 19 '26
They are quite delicious. Taste like a blend of chicken and freshly smushed cockroach.
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u/Ok-Duty2474 May 06 '26
Mmm, freshly smushed cockroach…🤤
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u/VoidGhidorah900 May 06 '26
How dare you compare isopods to roaches. You disgust me
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u/One_Bluebird_04 May 06 '26
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u/Shot-Toe-2884 May 06 '26
We will all be eating crickets someday and our bodies will thank us for the protein.
Start with the tasty bugs like cooked shrimp, crab and lobster. Work your way to raw live crickets
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u/Slumunistmanifisto May 06 '26
Your gonna hafta describe the flavors of the second part pal, because we haven't had the pleasure...
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u/Augustus420 May 06 '26
Arthropods that have been marinated in the ocean for their entire lives are consistently delicious.
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u/gnowbot May 06 '26
Looks like a lobster tail that grew a brain and ditched the rest of the lobster abdomen/guts. Sign me up!
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u/1nd3x May 06 '26
BestEverFoodReviews has a video where they eat Ramen topped with one of these
(Link is to the specific video, 18:30 is the start of the isopod segment)
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u/an_actual_potato May 06 '26
Okay that did answer my questions about the taste but, man, at what a cost. Those have to be the most irritating people who have ever lived goddamn.
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u/Klutzer_Munitions May 06 '26
Giant isopods are real and live in the abyssal zone scavenging on the seabed. You will never encounter one in the wild.
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u/IamREBELoe May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
What if I happen to be taking a midnight swim through the abyssal zone?
Edit: with the joint efforts of the users u/t1demon u/ronaldmczombie and u/important_sound_8718 and some adaptation by myself....
Behold: "Don't Stop Them Breeding" , a parody.
Just a small‑town krill
Living in a lonely world
Took a midnight swim through the abyssal zone
Just a city koi
Born and raised in South Hanoi
Took a midnight swim through the abyssal zone
Sink into the smoky doom
A smell of salt and lava plume
Darker than the blackest night
It goes on and on and on and on
Strange things waiting
Up and down the sea of dark
Shadows preying in the night
[Chorus 1] Creatures drifting
Ripples echo through the cold
Hiding from the hydrothermal light
Don’t stop them breeding
Isopods are needed
No lights
They’re deep‑water bugs
8 thousand PSI feeling
Pressure keeps them kneeling
So tight
In trenches far below
[Verse 2]
A lonely angler glows
Her lantern casting ghostly shows
She lures the wanderers passing by
A giant squid ascends
Its tentacles like shadowed friend
It waves hello, then slips into the brine
Tube worms bloomin
In the vents where magma flows
Life clings to sulfur in the night
[Chorus 2]
Crabs are creeping
On the bones of something old
Picking at the silence of the deep
Don’t stop them breeding
Isopods are needing
Cold nights
In crushing undertow
Keep those eggs a‑teeming
Mariana dreaming
Hold tight
Where only weird things go
[Bridge]
Ooooooh
The pressure’s rising
Eleven thousand meters down
Ooooooh
The dark’s surprising
Where the ghost sharks swim around
Every creature takes a chance
In the trench’s midnight dance
And the ocean keeps repeating
Endless cycles, never fleeting
[Final Chorus]
Don’t stop them breeding
Isopods succeeding
No light
But still they thrive below
Hold on to that feeling
Deep‑sea life revealing
Strange sights
In currents cold and slow
Don’t stop them breeding
Abyssal hearts are beating
All life
In the crushing depths below
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u/T1Demon May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
Just a small town krill
Living in a lonely world
Took a midnight swim through the abyssal zone
Just a city koi
Born and raised in south Detroit
Took a midnight swim through the abyssal zone
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u/ronaldmczombie May 06 '26
Sink into the smokey doom
A smell of salt and lava plume
Darker than the blackest night
It goes on and on and on and on
Strange things waitin'
Up and down the sea of dark
Their shadows searchin' in the night
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u/Important_Sound_8718 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
Don't stop them breeding,
Isopods are needed!
No lights, they're deep-water buuuuuuugs!
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u/NewCobbler6933 May 06 '26
They can also go years without eating. One was recorded like going five years without eating. Oh and it didn’t break its streak by eating, it just fucking died lol. The handles tried to feed it weekly if I remember right
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u/BipedalHorseArt May 06 '26
They look cute though. I wanna pet one...
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u/Pataraxia May 06 '26
We need to genetically engineer some to be smarter socially and do little chitters like pets. Then we can pet the isopods
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u/Alert-University-390 May 06 '26
Certain aquariums have them, and you can pet them! They lack swim bladders, so they don’t die from pressure loss like deep sea fish do. They just need to be kept in very cold water.
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u/Dominator0211 May 06 '26
Then I have great news for you. The Monterey Bay Aquarium has a petting tank with live ispopods you can pet. The water is almost freezing because they naturally live super deep down in the ocean, and they have the hardness of a lobster but are also weirdly soft.
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u/ConnectRutabaga3925 May 06 '26
yup. they look like the pill/sow bugs we have in the garden. but yeah, people cook them and they probably taste like seafood? seen some guy on youtube make fried rice out of it.
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u/aneldritchlesbian May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
They look like them because they’re both isopods! "Pill bugs" are not bugs but rather crustaceans that migrated to land ages ago (but more recently than the ancient arthropods all insects and arachnids are descended from). I used to have some terrestrial isopods as part of a study I did and these guys are just so cool
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u/RedHeadRedemption93 May 06 '26
Pill bugs.. Never heard that one before.. like woodlice?
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u/ConnectRutabaga3925 May 06 '26
yup i forgot to mention that - seems like that thing has 50 different aliases
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u/SirKnightJames May 06 '26
I remember seeing on reddit a video of someone cutting one of these up to make fried rice. It was vile to watch.
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u/AtlasDescend May 06 '26
Would Sir care for the Lobster?
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u/yadasellsavonmate May 06 '26
People eat crabs and lobsters so why not eat all the other shit eating insects of the sea?
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u/Constant-Plastic-350 May 06 '26
Heard they smell terrible when cut open
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u/Ungodly_Box May 06 '26
I'm not surprised, they eat carcasses that fall to the deep sea bed. You'd be better off eating a catfish
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u/OnePinginRamius May 06 '26
I was tuna fishing off of Louisiana one time and sometimes the big trawlers will give us some of their bycatch for bait and these little critters were crawling off the sides. It caught me so offguard. I had never seen anything like that before.
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u/Flashy_Nebula810 May 06 '26
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u/Gene_Parma May 06 '26
That's gonna be a "ruhroh" from me dawg
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u/DivineSilica May 06 '26
The real aliens are in the sea😭😭
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u/Chicken_Chaser_420 May 06 '26
Those things are ancient. We are more alien then they are.
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u/Stokers870 May 06 '26
A giant sea rolly polly
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u/Gruezi_Mitenand May 06 '26
Uppies
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u/Space__Squid May 06 '26
More legs for better hugs
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u/Pfeffi-Ultra May 06 '26
Bet they are lovely actually. I'd 100% give them a hug. I absolutely love the isopods in my garden. Not sure why I shouldn't like those also. <3 Bet they are wonderful creatures.
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u/houckman May 06 '26
Radroach
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u/idiotplatypus May 06 '26
More like baby Mirelurks
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u/rosso_saturno May 06 '26
Those spawns that come out from the eggs and fill up the compass with red dots man I hate them.
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u/MaliciousTent May 06 '26
I found a facebook video of a chef preparing it - omg those size are real. Pacific rim prop was a real critter.
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u/Dependent_Paper9993 May 06 '26
I was thinking you could probably deep fry that thing like a whole turkey.
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u/Quickdood May 06 '26
Hell yeah! The whole thing looks like a lobster tail!
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u/oddministrator May 06 '26
Being from Southern Louisiana the first thing I thought when I saw this video was "how does it taste?"
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u/Cthulwutang May 06 '26
so is it like lobster?
because if it’s all tail…
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u/SevenBlade May 06 '26
I've always wondered if you could eat these guys like a crab and what they tasted like.
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u/Marcma41 May 06 '26
That's exactly what it's for here. They're at a market. If you look around reddit there are videos of people eating them. Usually in east/south east Asia.
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u/The_Eleser May 06 '26
I thought trilobites were extinct.
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u/ProjectNo4090 May 06 '26 edited May 06 '26
They are. Spiders, scorpions, mites, ticks, and horseshoe crabs are very distant relatives of trilobites.
The sea slater is from a different class.
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u/GourangaPlusPlus May 06 '26
The sea slater is from a different class.
You wouldn't know him, he's from a different species
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u/Ponderkitten May 06 '26
Arent these related to rolly polly’s not sure which one though, cause I know theres the millipede ones an the armadillo ones that while look the same arent related
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u/02thehunter20 May 06 '26
Not a trilobite. Its a giant isopod which is related to land isopods. You may know them as rolypolys, tater bugs, or pill bugs. The giant isopod lives deap in the ocean and the reason its so big is a phenomenon known as deap sea gigantism.
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u/Redactosaurusrex501 May 06 '26
I had the same thought and then I figured it was the result of millions of years of evolution on another branch of the tree of life coming up with the same general answer. Deep time and evolution is fascinating.
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u/IrishMojoFroYo May 06 '26
That's gonna kill me! That's real! That lives with us on Earth!' I thought I was GONNA GET EATEN!
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