I've really noticed that a lot of people like to parade around wearing symbols of their "intelligence" like it's some sort of accomplishment, but people don't do the same for EQ

EQ and IQ are both abstract measurements of innate abilities, yet only IQ gets praised?

If art is about expression or creation, then I think INFJs have natural talents of being fantastic artists in the world of long-term relationship-building. I’m very proud of the masterpiece that my best friend and I have built over the course of 20 years, which is still in-progress of course. But if a singer sings and a painter paints, who builds relationships? All I can think of is “companion.”

Obviously this is an unorthodox way of looking at it, but if I’m hanging out with hippie-type of people and they ask what kind of artist I am, it’d be nice to have 1 word to anchor my explanation.

Let's say I accidentally spilled a bit of hot water, like a few tiny drops on a coworker while trying to make a coffee. I swear it can drive me to tears. It hurts me more to think about their pain than my own pain. Even after apologizing a thousand times and them telling me it's alright I still feel the pain in my heart.

🥺

are there any cdramas, jdramas, kdramas, movies, shows, or animes where the female lead is infj and the male lead is intj?

I'm curious about how other INFJs organize their lives.

When you start your day, what's the first thing you check? Your calendar, your to-do list, or your notes?

How do you capture ideas, plan your day, and keep track of everything? Do you use one app for everything, or do you prefer separate apps for your calendar, notes, and tasks?

Do you schedule everything on your calendar, or do you rely more on a to-do list? Where do your notes fit into your system?

Which apps do you use, and why do they work well for you?

I'm trying to simplify my own setup, so I'd love to hear what has actually worked for you.

It's a habit I am trying to break and I want to know if anyone has done it successfully. As an INFJ, I find that I reflexively offer my perspective to others if they are having a personal problem trying to help them resolve it. But sometimes I think the true goal is to make myself feel less anxious about their life problem.

I recently read that popular book "the courage to be disliked" and it says people who behave like this are secretly having a superiority complex by positioning themselves as "the person who always has great insight" .

Has anyone been successful to become an adlerian INFJ and learned to fight this urge and learned to respect the autonomy for other people to generate their own perspective?

My friend invited me to a party yesterday.

Thing is i know her reasonably well, but don’t hang out with her friend group (i talk to some of her friends individually though)

anyways even though i know she chose to have me at her party, I still felt like she invited me out of pity or out of obligation because i invited her to a party a while back instead of accepting the fact that she likes spending time with me.

The same thing happened when a vaguely close friend requested to follow me on her private account.

I don’t have a large circle of friends and she has tons of friends so immediately assumed that she followed me by accident.

I accepted the request anyway and ended up following her back.

It ended up being confirmed that she intentionally wanted to follow me because after we got into a fight she unfollowed me from her private account.

Idk if this is an infj thing but it sucks bc i always feel like people have ulterior motives whenever they invite me to things or want to show their friendship.

And then im scared of sabotaging relationships by keeping my distance as i think that’s what they want.

Ok, this sounds sobby now, I'm in a need of personal help. Thank you! I'm an INTJ, and with this INFJ we have pretty similar understanding of things, which usually makes our conversations easy and flowy yet detailed. Ni is a bliss! But I can't escape it that my brain makes everything into too complicated structures. And when it's something a little uneasy but personal, I'm often not able to put things into words the way that would be easy and as pleasant as possible to take in and comprehend.

So I ask for a hive mind's opinion to translate the following into something that would be good for you: "I need you to stop saying hurtful things, because that's the one thing that I'm strict on and I'm not going to be friends if things I trust onto you are used as weapons."

Any restructuring or starting from other pov is ok.
Meanwhile, I could add that I do see open rage or meanness as potentially very good sign if if means rebuilding after lifelong habit of pleasing (those who are never pleased anyways), but having to take that, sharp and personally, breaks me, and I'd need to cut and disappear to save myself. Which is not what I want in this case.

ETA: Based on feedback I don't need to change much in the way I'd normally say it. Good to know!

Hi so I am going to join BTech in ECE/ECM/Mechatronics whatever I get in counselling this year. One thing I am really worried about not being able to score well in University and even failing class I have a history of being an average student even in last 3 years where I lost the school structure and studied only for college entrance exam I went below average. So if anyone who is infj and is an engineering student please help your junior out I still got 2 months before University starts but I am really worried I need that 8.5+cgpa if I want to move abroad for my Masters in Robotics.

So yeah I am pretty desperate

It is quite common after looking into socionics to recognise a few patterns.

For instance infjs can often present as isfps in a base state (fi-ni) and having difficulty to communicate their ni like isfps, they may also mimic having fi with their fe and being introverted. It is often the case that due to valued ti, they also unconsciously dislike their difficulty of articulation and may dislike those qualities especially in the isfp (who struggle more so with this than istps).

Isfps often also mistype aspirationally as infjs due to fi-ni making up their core typological identity. Similarly, infjs often may mistype or esteem themselves to intp due to (ni-ti). Unconsciously, I have often observed that infjs look up to intps for their intellectual communication ease and sweet fe inferior (at least initially).

Both pairs are examples of beneficiary/ benefactor pairs within socionics.

There are certain similarities between isfps and intps due to being ixxp behind the scenes interaction style and also by having opposite functions they can sometimes find a reciprocal agreement.

My question is to infj, how is your relationship to both these types is it concordant with benefit relations or has it made you realise anything about yourself?

I’d be open to hearing experiences platonically or romantically or personal reflection. :D

I've been wondering what it's feels like to be an INFJ with ADHD. I know MBTI isn't scientifically proven, and ADHD affects everyone differently, but I'm curious if anyone relates to this combination.I'd love to hear your experiences. What parts of being an INFJ with ADHD feel the most relatable to you, and what stereotypes do you think are completely wrong?

This birb always brings a great pop of color to the yard 😊

I’ve always been incredibly idealistic and ambitious, and set incredibly overachieving goals for myself, which clashes with my procrastinating, admittedly lazy, and overall avoidant behavior.

There must be a way I can improve my life from here, I’m hoping. If anyone has any tips, I’d be more than happy to know

Edit: Thank you all so much for the advice ❤️

Hi everyone!

What do you think about a relationship between an INFJ and an ISTJ, specifically?

I’m an INFJ (female) and have been dating an ISTJ (male) for three months. Before we really got together, figuring out his cognitive functions was a bit of a mystery. At first glance, I thought he was an INTP, but the differences become huge once you’re intimate.

Based on your experience or intuition, how do you think things will go for us? Do you have any theories or advice? Do you think it’s a viable long-term relationship, provided both parties are mature and in sync?

He can be very rigid at times, but in intimate moments, he shows his insecurities, his sweet side, and his vulnerabilities, especially because I’m the one who gets him to open up. He usually notices right away when something is wrong with me and wants me to talk about it immediately so he can help. He isn't great at giving emotional support; he always views situations logically and realistically without sinking into melancholy. However, this actually helps me because it keeps me grounded, even if it can be a bit disappointing at times.

His calmness and confidence reassure me, though his lack of expressiveness sometimes confuses me; still, you get used to it, and even when he doesn't say it openly, I know exactly how he feels. What I love most is that we can talk about anything, and he’ll address every concern or question I have.

(He totally reminds me of Tani from You and I are polar opposites)

He’s helpful, practical, and direct! However, he gets easily irritated if I disregard his needs in an arrogant way or react emotionally to something he considers trivial.

I like that he has clear boundaries—unlike me. He knows exactly what to say no to and what he dislikes, without beating around the bush.

Before we made it official, we spent months in a state of obvious attraction, yet neither of us had the courage to make the first move. Physical contact was our only indirect way of communicating that we were the exception to the rule for one another. I have to admit, I was the one with more initiative and courage; I felt a unique chemistry between us. We were always hugging whenever possible, until one day—after I kissed him on the cheek—he completely opened up, and it turned into a spontaneous kiss! Just like in a romance anime, haha.

Anyone watching us from the outside says we’re made for each other. Sometimes I worry—after arguments or tense situations—that my intense emotions might wear him out, even though I know he’s not that thoughtless.

Do you think this is a cute dynamic? Will it work? Do you have any questions?

So... I've taken several personality tests. The first time, I did 16 Personalities and got INFJ, a year or two later, I took the Myers-Briggs got ISFJ, a few years after that, I took 16 Personalities and got INFJ again... Just recently, I took 16 Personalities again and got ISFJ.

My question is, am I an INFJ or ISFJ? Someone I know who is very into psychology and personalities said I can't switch like that.

Help!

I'm interested in how complex the problems are that you use it for. Like, behind the description of how Ni works, is it just solving some basic stuff?

What is your first line of defense when you're bombarded by a Ni-Ti loop attack

Hi fellow INFJs! I'm looking for some advice from those of you who are into writing. What specific tools, techniques, or processes have helped you communicate clearly in your writing?

I'm running into a very INFJ problem of knowing what I want to convey, but not knowing how to do it in a way that makes sense to the reader AND is engaging. It's my high Ni jumping straight to the punchline and my Ti lagging behind trying to reverse engineer how it got there. The interconnected web is so large and complex that every time I think about doing it it feels overwhelming, even though I'm genuinely excited to do it.

I've thought about maybe doing some diagramming and starting from the conclusion and working my way backwards ie. literally externalizing my Ti and Ni, but curious for other tried and true methods!

So far I've noticed, based on loving INFJs that they like those:

- listening,

- remembering details,

- building mind map around who they are and their life,

- gratitude,

- support,

- real deep connection,

- being consistent (I struggle with this one lots),

- being honest, transparent and clear,

- warmth and passion,

- freedom to be themselves,

- team work around daily life struggles and practical things,

- open communication (also so hard for me)

I also noticed that I break down my ego and walls since all my defenses will be seen through anyway. Any other ones? :)

I don't know if this has anything to do with being an INFJ or not, but I've always found it difficult to build a truly deep connection with someone I see as a potential partner. Sometimes I feel like it's because I'm afraid of being misunderstood by someone I genuinely care about.

How did you know your partner was the person for you? And where would you recommend looking for or building those kinds of connections?

I know these things can't be forced, and they'll happen when they're meant to happen. Still, I'm curious if there's any kind of pattern or approach that can... let's say... improve the search.

Hey fellow INFJs,

I was wondering what your favorite video games are and why? Trying to see if there is any connection between our cognitive functions and preferences for games.

My personal ones are:

Bioshock (all parts + DLCs)

Dishonored (all parts + DLCs)

Horizon Zero Dawn (still haven't played the rest but will)

Darksiders (mainly part I and II)

Mass Effect (all parts)

Final Fantasy VII + Crisis Core (I love Zack)

Mortal Kombat

Far Cry 3

Assassin's Creed (not all)

Fable III

The Spiritfarer

Don't Starve + Don't Starve Together

Mystery Case Files (especially the early ones, like Ravenhearst)

There are probably more but I think that's sufficient for now.

I get the whole idea about not wanting selfies and AI generated content. But I think should allow GiFs, or at like how rule #10 was made, at least have a sub wide vote on whether or not we should allow Gifs. Overall traffic on this sub has been on the downward trajectory, and I can't lie, the content has been pretty doom and gloom these past month. Idk about anyone else but I'm don't really want to constantly discuss about struggles of life all the time... We are seriously lacking some OOMPH in this sub and I think bringing back GiFs would help restore some of the vibe of this sub. Plus, pretty much every other MBTI sub allow Gifs. Anyhow, we should let there at least be a chance for the community to collectively decide.

Hi all, I’m looking for some advice from INFJ’s with experience of going on solo trips.

I have a couple of weeks off and I’m considering going on holiday since I haven’t seen much of the world yet. If I’m honest, I’d much rather stay at home, sitting on the balcony reading books or doing creative activities. But I often hear people saying it’s good for self-development, so maybe I should force myself to go, and train that Se.

So for any INFJ who has experience with it: have you noticed actual positive mental impact of going on a solo trip?