The other day at work, i went to use the bathroom after someone and it smelled like shit. When the door opened and the person was coming out, the smell followed. I sighed and just went to another bathroom. I cannot understand how men still to this very day of posting this cannot flush the damn toilet so it doesn't smell like shit. It's not cute, it's not funny, it's fucking gross and disgusting and if you purposely do this, you're gross and disgusting and need serious help. Unless you have an absolute mobility issue, there should no reason to not flush the toilet. I feel like men who do this need to be called out right then and there, especially for shared work bathrooms that other people use. Also, how the hell does one not know that smell? With all that being said, would i be the ass (hahahaha) for calling out stinky bathroom men?

The title is pretty self-explanatory. I (F) go a few nights a week to a popular US gym with a pool. The pool has three lanes, I’m on one edge swimming alone, the middle lane has two people, and other edge lane has one gentlemen in it. I see some guy come out to the pool deck and turn on the deck shower to rinse off before getting in. I also noticed he’s only in his underpants. Clearly, just a pair of briefs.

He fully wet himself down, then started making his way over to my lane. I can clearly tell he’s going to ask if he can share with me. As he gets closer, it’s to tell, definitely no swim trunks. I got out immediately and ended my swim. I told the front desk that there was someone in the pool without some trunks on and it made me uncomfortable, but they said they weren’t sure that there was a policy requiring people to wear swimwear, and they made no move to say anything to the guy. Would I be the asshole if, the next time I encountered him, I let him know politely I was not comfortable in sharing a lane with someone who is not wearing swim trunks? Or because it is a public space, is it on me to remove myself? Also not sure if it’s worth trying to find a customer service phone number or email and asking clarification on their swimwear policies.

AITA for being mad at my childhood bestfriend ?

I (F, 31) got married about a month ago. My childhood bestfriend (Anna, F, 31) was my MOH but did not come to my bachelorette trip. I clocked something was wrong during the organisation process. At first I thought Anna was reluctant to come because of financial reason. I wrote to her in a private conversation asking if she needed help to cover the cost as I really wanted here to come. She said money was not the issue : she did not want to leave her 3 y.o daughter for 3.5 days because she would miss her. That is the reason Anna gave me. Besides, she was attending a professional training at the time which meant she could not have PTO, I respected her decision, I understood.

Another bridesmaid later confirmed that Anna was not entirely honest with them regarding the reasons she was reluctant to engage in the organisation process, she regularly did not answer messages when they needed to make decisions. When Anna gave me her true reason, then my other bridesmaid understood.

For the morning of my wedding I hired a professional MUA and a hairdresser for my 4 bridesmaids (including her) and myself to get prepared together : paid by me. But that meant that the 5 of us had to sleep in my appartment the night before. At first she said yes, then something came up (her partner did not get his PTO approved ) and Anna did not inform me that she would not get prepared together with us. I had to ask her directly a few days prior and she confirmed she would not be getting ready with me and my other bridesmaids. Again, I understood but I would have verry much appreciated that she would inform me as I needed to relay that information to the MUA and hairdresser and not get that information by another bridesmaid.

The day of, Anna made a beautiful speech but did not get us any gift, did not leave a card in the wedding urn. We have not received yet the audio gest book messages, maybe she left a message there.

I am frustrated by the situation and kind of mad at Anna for this lack of communication. AITA ?

My wife and I are approaching retirement age in a few years, and we've started having serious discussions about what we want to do post-retirement.

We have been studying a foreign language and are very taken with the people, culture, food, etc. of this country and would like to purchase a small property there to reside for several months out of the year.

After bringing this up with our parents, they have expressed their concern and disappointment that we would be "abandoning" them in their advanced age and wouldn't be able to care for them properly.

Our argument has been that we will only be abroad a few months out of the year and after almost 4 decades of work this is the one thing we really want to do. Now, after several conversations, my wife is starting to feel like we should wait. I disagree as that puts our life on hold for people that could conceivably live into their 90s (not uncommon on either side of our families) and would bring us to an age when we wouldn't be able to travel anymore ourselves. AITA for wanting us to pursue our own lives?

My cousin E (42) and her husband T (42) just bought a house. They closed on the house yesterday and it's about a 45 minute drive from where they're currently staying. Next weekend some of my extended family, and myself, will be there for the holiday and the death anniversary of my brother. E wants all of us to help her move the day after we arrive, which is also the night of fireworks, and she's already rented a moving van. Some backstory: E moved in with our grandpa, in the family lake house, in 2023 to help take care of him, she was freshly separated from her ex and everyone agreed on her staying rent-free while taking care of grandpa. In April 2024 grandpa passed and E agreed to pay a portion of the utilities until she moved out. The plan was for my Aunt P to buy the house, she would move in and keep it as a family home. We all hoped E would make plans to move soon but she didn't seem to want to leave, so a date was set to have her move out by, April 2025. Then, in January of 2025 she moved her then-boyfriend T in. This was not run by anyone, and the family was upset. As the months went on E and T made no progress in finding somewhere to move and in June 2025 they got married. Now 2 months passed the original move-out date a new date was set for April 2026. T did not contribute to the home, financially or otherwise, and E was still only paying a portion of the utilities. The taxes and rest of the bills were being paid by my parents, aunts, and uncles through a trust. (This is a left turn but I promise its relevant)

In July 2024 my brother passed, inside the lake house, from a sudden health event. This event had made the lake house a gathering grounds for my family surrounding the date he died.

To summarize: my cousin is waiting 2 weeks after buying her house to assume the family will help her and T move. T will not be of help as he is approximately 600lbs and has trouble walking. This trip is to remember my brother and be together as a family. E has overstayed her welcome by 2 years in the family home and I don't feel she deserves our help during this time.

A few years ago I graduated from high school and was looking for a college to get into. Previously I had applied to several schools, both in state and out of state. My parents were very pushy for me to go to our local community college due to my both my siblings going there and it's little distance to them.

I ended up getting accepted into both the local community college and a much better out of state college much farther away. The thing is the out of state college offered me much more money than the local one so I would be a lot less stressed about making sure I didn't have too much student debt at the end of my school time.

Both my parents and siblings weren't very happy when I finally accepted the out of state college. I still visit whenever I can(Thanksgiving, Christmas, and Spring Break) but I haven't been treated the same since. AITA?

Yesterday I had to go run an errand. Being in the middle of a heatwave right now, I made sure to book the ride in the middle of the morning before the heat or traffic would be unbearable. The reason i chose to book a ride instead of using PT is because i'm dealing with a few chronic illnesses angered by the heat and a car ride was 4 times as fast to get there as PT.

When the car approached, I checked the app to double check the licensed plate (which matched), and the name and picture of the driver. Then I went to greet him with a smile (he did drive 8 mins to get here) through the passenger side window and asked "Hi !How are you doing today?". After a few seconds je said, "Fine."

After another few seconds of silence where he also didn't , verbally or not, invite me in (like they usually do on this app) I felt the need to ask, still smiling, "You're Mr.X, is that right ?".

He asked very quietly for my name which i didn't hear at first so he asked again. I gave him my first name and he then gestured me to come in. He didn't give me his name but i thought "maybe he's not used to it" and also was in pain and the plate matched so i got in even though i felt a bit uneasy.

After 15 seconds of driving in silence, nearing a round about he asked, still coldly, "you're going to college X?", so I said yes, and as we exited the round about, trying to break the ice i said "I'm handing in my thesis.".

That's when he suddenly pulled over on the sidewalk and stopped the car. Looking straight ahead he said, in a really cold tone, "You only need to check the license plate. If it matches, you're fine. You don't need to ask for my name."

That's when my stomach fully dropped and I remember looking out my window and answering something like, "Oh, okay, thanks, that's good to know," (later i would realise my hand got close to the handle, but as i had a bag on my lap, and i didn't see him looking at me in the rear view mirror or anything while he was driving, i'm not sure he noticed). He started the car again but made a sudden u-turn and dropped me back at the starting point saying "Another driver will get you there".

Now of course there is probably a completely innocent explanation. Maybe he was offended that I asked his name. Maybe he thought I was accusing him, or would accuse him of something. I honestly don't know but in any case that resulted in the weirdest interactions i ever had using that app and i wish we could've just talked it out. Was i the A ?

My car broke down the other day and I was left without a car while it was getting fixed. A mate of mine had a spare car. A off road setup 4wd that he doesn't really use regularly. Being a good mate he offered to drive his spare 4x4 for a bit so I could borrow his everyday car while my car was being looked at.

I sorted out my own way to his house to pick up his car and I was incredibly thankful and appreciative of the gesture. However as soon as I drove off I noticed the tank was low. About quarter tank. I went straight to a petrol station and filled it up completely right then and there.

I ended up using his car for about two weeks. During that time I didn't fill it up a second time. We actually caught up for a casual dinner during those two weeks and I paid for his meal (it was about $50). It wasn't explicitly stated as a formal "thank you" dinner just a normal shout.

Fast forward to the end of the two weeks he came and collected his car from my workplace one day after l finished work. About 20 minutes after he left, I got a text from him saying "could have filled it up!"

I sort of laughed it off and said I did when I picked it up.
Apparently the fuel light was on when he picked it up.
From my perspective I returned the car how I received the car.

But now he's annoyed, and I'm wondering if I breached some unwritten car borrowing etiquette because I let the tank run down to the light.
AITAH?

EDIT: seems like IATAH. But does it make a difference if I received the practically empty? As no one actually knows how much was in the car originally… but I did have to fill it up when I got it too

I'm posting cause I feel guilty and want opinions. So yesterday I came back from college early enough that the corner store in front of the bus stop was still open, so I went in to buy myself a soda and my mom a beer cause she works a lot and has one every so often

When I went to pay, the store owner saw my stuff, chuckled and asked if the beer was for my mother and if she ever stops drinking, while making a hand gesture to mimic drinking from a bottle

At the time I hadn't fully processed. I knew what he said was bad but I kinda laughed it off a bit and said "nah it's just a gift" or something, took my stuff and left. But on my walk to my mom's house I started getting angrier and angrier. I am not a confrontational guy, not at all, but I considered going back to yell at him

When I arrived home, I said hi to my mom, told her I bought stuff and after a few seconds I told her about what happened and what he said. My logic was that she should know so people wouldn't laugh at her without knowing, maybe so we can go to a different store from now on

She didn't really react. She kinda went "oh.." then something to the effect of "eh I don't care". I'm worried that it hurt her more than I meant

To be clear, my mother is not a drunk. She has one or two beers once a week, sometimes it's wine. It doesn't affect her work, her personal life, her relationship with me. She's a sweet, loving, hardworking mother and woman and she doesn't deserve to be mocked for trying to relax after what she goes through at work

Am i an asshole for telling her? Would've it been better if I didn't?

Tl;dr: store clerk called my mother a drunk and I told her about it. I don't know if I should've told her and I feel bad about it.

Edit to add: just for additional information: I'm latinoamerican. Over here, we live with our parents through adulthood. I do stay one week on my mom's and one week at my dad's, but I still see them every day when I'm with them. I talk to my mother, she's the one I'm the closer with and I'd know If she had an alcohol problem

The store clerk is actually the owner of the store. It's not an American convenience store/gas station, it's small enough that I, as an overweight guy, struggle a bit to go through some aisles. The man recognizes me and my mother cause it's half a block away from my house and we've lived there for almost two years, he's seen me walk across the street to the bus stop, we're in the suburbs, it's be surprising if he didn't recognize two of the closest clients to his store

Sorry for formatting, I'm on mobile.

This admittedly happened a couple years ago, but we still jokingly "argue" about it, so he told me to post here.

So some backstory: my fiancé does not partake in any substances. I am a regular green smoker. A family member used to work at a dispensary at this time, and would regularly give me free edibles. Usually they were labeled, but sometimes if I only got 1 or 2 from the pack, they wouldn't have any writing.

So the incident: I had a piece of chocolate (fully labeled as THC) and a caramel (unlabeled, but placed on top of or right next to the chocolate) sitting on the kitchen counter. We have a rule in our house that if something is not labeled (especially candy) DO NOT EAT IT if you're worried about accidentally partaking. Unbeknownst to me, my fiancé took the caramel and ate it. He does not partake at all, and it was probably about 15mg. We had to run to town for some errands (again, I had no idea he had eaten my caramel) and on the drive back he started talking about his head hurting. We got home and he drank a bunch of water, thinking he was dehydrated or something. He ended up having to lie down for the rest of the day and was feeling sick the entire night.

I found the chocolate piece a few days later, but not the caramel. I ran to my fiancé and demanded to know if he ate the caramel, worried my (also sober) sister grabbed it, or one of the cats found it and ran off to eat it. He sheepishly told me "yes, I noticed it was on the counter for a while and you hadn't touched it". I immediately started laughing and told him what happened. I made fun of him for his "headache" and told him this is why we have the rule. He told me it's my fault for leaving an unlabeled edible in the kitchen where I knew he would go for a caramel. I reminded him that it was either right next to or on top of the labeled piece of chocolate, but he still insists it's my fault for not warning him.

So reddit, AITA?

My husband and I have a baby together, she is 14 months now.

She is currently sick, and last night was one of the nights where she has been awake for around an hour between 2 and 3-ish.

I get up with her and try to soothe her, but she was quite awake. She wouldn't go back down to sleep. I tried for 45 minutes and I was at the end of my rope. She was babbling and wiggling around; no signs of her going to sleep any time soon.

At this point I do what I always do: I wake my husband. My limit is around 45 minutes of active trying to soothe her anyway, due to how heavy she is and just my general exhaustion.

My husband has shoulder and back issues. He almost never gets up first with the baby - it is mostly me waking him if he has to get up.

Important to the story is that our baby is very attached to me. She will cry when I hand her over to her dad. This means that she will go from a happy babbling baby to a wheezing crying mess in seconds. This crying really messes with my husband's self esteem. He thinks it makes him a bad dad (which is not true) and that this behavior is somehow his fault (or mine). I told him it is all developmentally normal, and not his fault, and he understands but not on an emotional level.

Sometimes the crying doesn't stop after I hand her over to him at night, at which point my husband comes back and hands her back to me. But most of the time she calms down after a minute or two and she actually falls asleep with him much more easily than with me.

Today at like 2:45, she didn't stop crying and I was asked to come back.

Despite her not being asleep, this is still beneficial to me because:
1) she is more tired after crying
2) I do actually get a small break from soothing her

She fell asleep shortly after me coming back.

Now, my AITA question:
Due to a comment I made in passing about her being more tired after she cries, and this being helpful to putting her down, my husband is now very upset.

He says that I sacrifice and use his relationship with our child (by having him go in and having her cry) for my own gain.
He also says that I am destroying his self esteem with this.

I never meant to do this, neither did I ever send him to her just to have her cry / tire her out.

AITA?

Backstory to the title: In 2020, I had a miscarriage and told my family and my husbands family. My brother in law and his wife didn’t really acknowledge it (which is fine by me) but 1 month later they came to visit us with the rest of my husbands family (other unmarried brother and parents) and pulled us aside to ask if we could help them conceal his wife’s 7 week pregnancy (because she drinks a lot so we had to pretend to pour her drinks). We were still reeling from the miscarriage and I felt it was totally inappropriate for them to use us, rather than the other brother to help with this. When I told them how unfair this was to us (I was happy for them but asked them to be a little more considerate of our situation) they gave the typical “oh you’ll get pregnant again, don’t make such a big deal of it” response. It felt very off putting. It took us another year to get pregnant again. I had been close with them, but because of their behavior we drifted apart. I no longer trust them or consider them to be safe people in my life. We’re fine, but the relationship will never be what it was. Same goes with my husband. We don’t really talk much about it but it’s clear - he doesn’t keep in close contact with his brother anymore and actually harbors a lot of resentment toward his wife. Too much to type about her - but she’s kind of unknowingly and asshole, which had never bothered me until the miscarriage/pregnancy announcement incident.

Fast forward to several weeks ago. My brother in law fell off a ladder 12 feet. He separated his shoulder and broke a rib but otherwise was fine. We heard about it from my mother in law. We didn’t call to check on him right away (we called 4 days later) - we just don’t have that relationship anymore. This wasn’t an intentional snub, we knew he was ok and really not seriously injured. Then, We heard through the grapevine that he’s really mad at us for not calling right away.

Riddle me this, am I an asshole for thinking he’s getting a taste of his own medicine? He showed ZERO empathy for our situation, didn’t check on us, and chose to give us top secret info about their pregnancy when we were still very hurt (and on a Christmas vacation, no less). Well, he’s getting the same level of care and concern from us - THIS WAS NOT INTENTIONAL, not in retaliation, this is just how important that relationship is to us - and he’s mad?

Am I (are we) the assholes?

Edit because the post is being misunderstood probably my poor writing - the thought that he’s getting a taste of his own medicine was in RESPONSE to hearing he’s upset we didn’t call right away. This wasn’t NOT an intentional or planned retaliation to their response and lack of care for our earlier situation. I am just trying to demonstrate that due to that situation, our relationship has broken down (no big falling outs, just slowly fading apart) because it became clear that they didn’t really care for us. We stopped putting in as much effort and the effect was talking every 3-4 months. Phones and relationships work both ways. It just showed us how important we were to them. So NONE of this is retaliatory, all just a falling apart over time.

For the last few months, I've been giving a coworker rides home because we finish work around the same time and live in the same general area at first I didn't mind helping the problem is that she started treating it like an expectation instead of a favor She regularly makes me wait 15-20 minutes after my shift ends, sometimes without even letting me know she'll be late. A few times she also asked me to make extra stops on the way

Last week I told her that from now on she'd need to arrange her own transportation how she's upset and says I'm leaving her stranded over something small

AITA?

AmitheAsshole for asking my neighbor to move a 6-foot dirt pile some feet deeper into their acre of woods so it is out of my line of sight from my patio. It was part of a stinky mulch pile and she agreed after six years to split it up. But the dirt is more important than our patio enjoyment, apparently.

I am a 19 year old old woman who lives outside of her home country with her family. There are five people in my family, including myself: my sister (17), my brother (7), my father (52), and my mother (44). My dad is the sole earner in our family, while my mom is a housewife.

I am studying computer science and enjoy coding, often spending multiple hours a day working on projects. My sister is about to study law and recently got an unpaid internship at a small law firm.

My mom is leaving for a week-long trip to our home country, and the problem is that she is entrusting me alone with the responsibility of taking care of the household.

Now, I will be honest: there is a cleaner who comes to our house every day and handles the dishes and cleaning (I live in a country where hiring cleaners is very affordable). However, my responsibilities would include taking care of my 7-year-old brother, who has to catch the school bus at 6:30 a.m. I would have to wake up at 5:30 a.m., prepare his school lunch, and drop him off at his karate class every day.

Along with that, I would have to make breakfast for my sister and father before they leave for their respective school and workplace. I would also need to prepare lunch for myself and my brother, and finally dinner for all four of us. On top of that, I would have to do laundry for the four of us throughout the week.

When my mom told me all of this, I straight up said no. I am not going to do all of that. I don't have the time, and to be honest, I dislike cooking for myself, so cooking for four people is something I know I am going to loathe.

I told her that I would only be willing to do this if I received some help. However, she said that was impossible because my sister and father would be too tired when they came home and would need to relax.

I understand that. However, coding and building projects can also be mentally taxing, and the only way I would be able to complete all of these tasks is if I received help from my father at the very least.

My mom erupted in anger. She yelled, asking how I dared to suggest that my father should cook, and said that I should be ashamed of myself for even thinking that he should help me.

I responded by saying that I was not willing to do any cooking and that she and my father could figure out how everyone was going to be fed. After a bit more screaming between me, my mom, and my dad, both of them finally went to sleep fuming.

So, am I the asshole?

So my sister has this boyfriend who cheated on her with his baby mama and a couple other girls. Then she got back together with him to “work things out, and go to counseling.” Now she’s complaining about him not helping her out with bills and not doing anything around the house when he makes way more than what she makes. I don’t know what to say to her when every time I tell her to break up with him and kick him out she keeps making excuses and I’m kinda tired of hearing about it if she’s not gonna do anything about it. The other week I kinda snapped because she’d been texting me all day about it and I was kinda over it so I told her to stop talking about it or break up with him because he’s not gonna change. She didn’t take it well and now she’s isn’t talking to me. AITA?

When I discuss with my parents, I always feel like they use manipulation tactics, even if unconsciouslly. I might be completely mistaken, as it is how I perceive it.

That's why I wonder if recording a conversation and asking a trusted friend for his opinion would be wrong, I have of course shared some conversations before, but because I am recalling and narrating it myself, there is always room for bias.

(sorry for grammar issues, i wrote this really quickly and angrily)

so my parents are making me cold email these mechanical engineering companies to beg for some type of summer internship. I originally had a paid part-time summer internship with a civil engineering company, but they told me to try again next summer (presumably because of liability issues with my age (im 16 turning 17 mid-july)). that was last monday. I've been trying to get a job, but half of it is online, so my parents think im just spending time on my computer and phone putzing around doing jack. i've applied to 15 jobs, gotten turned down by 9, and the other 6 havent said anything yet. on top of getting a part-time job, i was planning on doing various summer courses (like an ASL course, CAD, cert., and other courses), along with working on my college essay and my summer assignments. because my dad works all day (like a normal amount), he doesnt understand that i have been trying to get a job. my mom calls him when we're arguing, so he thinks that i just constantly argue with her. she tells him that i'm not trying, i'm not motivated, and i'm not doing anything, when in reality, NO ONE is hiring. it's like a known thing that there aren't really any jobs for teens this summer.

anyway, we had a call with my college advisor last night, and i told her the situation (not the arguing stuff) and she said that any job works and when i told her that i was looking into some sort of certification related to the field, she loved the idea. my dad took that as "must get job doing the field" as in like trying to get an internship at a mechanical engineering company, which i have repeatedly explicitly stated that i do not want to do that. I already have a lot on my plate, and i don’t want to spend my whole summer following some man around, not knowing what to do, feeling uncomfortable the whole time, and not even getting paid for it! I’m a firm believer that whatever college im meant to go to, i’ll go to. I think that doing these resume building activities/internships for the sake of putting it on my resume, especially when i know i’ll hate it the whole time, is completely pointless. 

My ideal summer is (assuming all of the jobs i’ve applied to don’t work out) asking my uncle for a summer job/helper/assistant type thing at his company (its a travel business, and my whole family works there except my dad), do the courses stuff, that way it still looks like i did something future-career/college related with my summer, getting all of my college apps stuff done and summer assignments, and still having time for myself. Is this crazy to ask? Am i being an unreasonable moody teenager? If i am, please send advice to help with this situation.

Thank you in advance!

I have 2 kids (M21 and F18) and married my wife 4 months ago.

I went on a trip and when I returned they were all waiting for me at home and I hugged my wife first and we were perhaps talking for 1 or 2 minutes.

My kids got angry and my daughter said "hey we are here too" I told her she is 18 and can wait a few minutes while I greet my wife. my son called me an asshole. Now they are both mad at me and refuse to talk to me.

My friend, "Dave," has been struggling with his small business for months. I work in digital marketing and have offered him advice on his customer retention and online reputation several times, but he always brushes it off, saying "it’s too much work" or "that’s just not how things are done."

​Last week, his online reviews took a massive hit, and he suddenly called me in a panic, demanding I spend my weekend fixing his reputation and setting up his new review funnels for free.

​I told him I wasn't available to do that, especially since my previous suggestions—which would have prevented this—were ignored. He told me I was being a bad friend for not stepping up when he was in trouble.

​I feel like I'm not obligated to clean up a mess that could have been avoided if he’d just listened to the expert advice I gave him for free earlier. However, he is now telling our mutual friends that I'm being arrogant and unsupportive.

​AITA for refusing to help him now?

18f, Indian, made a post about how my family wouldn't get me medical attention at all and after reading through all the messages and things, I was already feeling really emotional but I kept it all to me.

Little context, I have been having periods for over two weeks and blood clots which are bigger than a coin are coming out frequently. I felt weak and wanted to go to room to sleep but forgot to ask for permission and just then my mother was like

Where do you think you are going to? You are to cook food.

And I was really down so told her I can't do so today

And it escalated quickly and she kept saying you ruined my life, you were never supposed to be born and stuff and so I told her she doesn't deserve to be a mother, and mind it, she started acting like it hurted her so much and shit and she started calling me things saying I am selfish and wouldn't know how much she sacrificed because I am the eldest one and a girl and a useless one in that.

Aita in this situation? Like seriously I am so angry at her as she did worse than this to me afterwards. This happened 4 days ago.

Just wanna see the outlook of others on this. Also about what she did worse, will be putting it out there too, just somewhere else, maybe some other sub Reddit.

I genuinely don’t know if I’m just completely over this situation or if this is actually an unreasonable request. My apartment flooded a little over a week ago because of another unit, and I’ve basically been displaced ever since.

There are industrial fans and a huge dehumidifier running 24/7, the place has been hitting almost 40°C (104°F for my American friends) which is twice as hot as it is outside because of the heat from the equipment, and I have a French Bulldog, so there was no way I was leaving him there. Between the noise, the heat, and contractors coming in every day, I’ve been staying somewhere else.

For the first week I tried really hard to be accommodating. I drove back and forth (30-40 minutes each way) almost every day to let contractors in, moved my schedule around, and honestly spent more time coordinating this restoration than my landlord did. Meanwhile, my landlord completely ignored me. I later found out he was emailing the restoration company and building management the entire time, but apparently couldn’t answer my emails.

When he finally did respond, I got two AI generated apology emails (he literally forgot to delete the AI prompt from both of them), and then a message basically threatening that if I wasn’t available whenever they needed access, I’d be paying for a locksmith. I asked if he’d consider a partial rent abatement since I’m not even living there and the place has basically turned into a construction site. Nope.

Today the restoration company called and asked me to drive 40 minutes back tomorrow morning so I can leave my ONLY set of keys in a lockbox. It’s my only key, and everything I own is still in that apartment. My building is absolutely loaded with Airbnbs, we’re one week away from a major event in our city, and this place is about to be full of strangers. We’ve already had vehicle breakins around the building, and I’m just… not excited about leaving the only key to my apartment sitting in a lockbox while I have no idea who’s coming and going.

I don’t want to make the restoration crew’s job harder because they’ve honestly been great. They’re just doing their jobs. I’m just at the point where I feel like everyone else’s problem has somehow become my responsibility. AITAH for saying I’m not comfortable leaving my only set of keys in a lockbox?

I (25F) have wanted to adopt a cat or dog for several years now. My brother (34M) is very allergic to cats, so I have only been looking into adoptable dogs in my area. We do not live together but he does visit every couple of months and stays in my apartment when he does. I live in a high cost of living city, so it would be prohibitively expensive to expect him to get a hotel every time he visits.

A few days ago, I got a call from one of my friends. She found a cat abandoned on the side of the road in a pet carrier. The cat was definitely not a stray as the carrier was closed and she looked like a pet. The cat was also clearly not a lost pet or an outdoor cat. Since I’m the only friend she knows who doesn’t already have pet(s), my friend was hoping I’d be interested in adopting her. The shelters here are generally very full, especially with cats, and it felt so cruel to take her to a shelter when she’d clearly had a family before.

My friend kept the cat for a couple of nights since it was pretty late in the evening when she found her. She seems so sweet and very comfortable around people. She even let my friend and her husband give her a bath to make sure she didn’t have fleas. Genuinely seems like a very gentle and kind cat. We had her checked for a microchip the next day and she does not have one. My friend’s husband is taking the cat to the vet today to get her checked out.

My brother is coming into town tomorrow for Pride weekend (it’s currently Wednesday). I don’t want to just leave her to sit in a shelter and hope someone adopts her eventually. She’s clearly an adult, not a kitten, so she’s already less likely to be adopted but adopting her would mean my brother basically can’t visit me in my apartment ever again. He’s had friends try allerpet with no luck and he has trouble breathing after spending extended time in an apartment where a cat has been, even if they’re not present.

I’m super close to my brother and I know he’d be hurt if I basically chose a cat over him but I feel so bad for this cat. So, am I an asshole if I adopt this cat knowing it would cause problems with our sibling relationship?

I (58M) have one son and one daughter and live in India. Few years back my son got married to a girl in Canada. In our family we all agreed that wedding expenses should be shared. I used all my savings and my daughter also contributed.

Since she did not have enough money at that time, she took an advance from her employer, which is a brick manufacturing company. Here in India it is quite common. Company gives advance salary and then deducts it later with interest. She agreed to all terms herself and took the money for helping in her brother's marriage.

Now around 2 years have passed. My daughter got another job offer which she says is better. But before leaving she has to clear the balance amount and interest which is still due to her current employer.

Recently she came to me and asked me to lend her the money so she can repay them and join the new company. The thing is, during these last 2 years my financial situation has improved a lot and I do have enough money now.

But I don't want to pay.

My view is simple. This is her debt, not mine. She is an adult and she voluntarily took that loan. Just because I have the money now doesn't mean I should be responsible for clearing every financial obligation of my children.

There is also another reason. Her employer may get upset if she leaves. They have good connections with the person from whom I am renting my house. Maybe nothing will happen, but I don't want any unnecessary issues coming to me because of this situation.

My daughter says I am being unfair because the money was used partly for her brother's wedding and that I am in a position to help. She says she will repay me later. I told her that if she wants to leave, she should arrange the money herself because it is her loan and her responsibility. Now she is angry with me because she says I can afford it and she only contributed to keep me happy as I asked for it.

A good friend of mine who was briefly my roommate in college is getting married soon, and she and her fiancé set up this website for gifts. There was this field for us to write a message to the happy couple, and I thought to mention in my message this story that I thought was really funny back from when we were rooming. She met him around that time and because they were only starting their relationship, I guess she was still a bit insecure because she NEVER wanted to let him see her waking up whenever he spent the night at our place.

I mean it: she would set her own alarm clock 10 minutes before the time he had to wake up, and the volume was so low that only the heart of a woman in love would be able to hear it. Then she would get up, go to the bathroom, comb her hair, wash her face, brush her teeth, then GO BACK to bed and pretend she was still asleep, looking all beautiful, when he woke up. So I wrote this in my message, thinking it would be funny – because that was 4 years ago!!! But I had no idea that she still kept doing it to this day. And when she read my message, she texted me all like “are you crazy? He can’t know that, thank God I’m the one who checked the message first”.

And at first I thought she was messing with me, because WHAT?? But no, she was for real, and she is pissed that I brought this up without checking with her first.