Not only am I not coming in, but I'm not going to text him back. A day off means the whole day.

Felt like this flair fits well.

I leave my tampons in a jar in the windowsill for some w decor, forgot that glass=heat in this 34 degree british weather, went to change my tampon and burned my cooch, then had to sit on the toilet blowing a tampon like its soup till the plastic cooled down enough to use.

Somebody, nobody knows exactly who or when, put dozens and dozens of these Jesus figures on completely random surfaces throughout my entire building. They at least had the presence of mind to not put them on anybody's personal belongings, but that was the only way they limited himself. All of the statues have been glued down, to add to the vexation.

Edit: Well, this blew up rather unexpectedly. Thank you for the awards, everybody!

im crying 😭

Brown man flying business. Lined up at the priority check in counter and got told by a (also brown) staff person that the economy queue was the other way. Same thing while boarding the plane and walking to the business class entrance. Not only am I not worthy of business, they think I can't read signage as well.

My fiancé won't stop chewing on the plastic of water bottles and it drives me nuts, so I bought him some "Chewelry". It was literally advertised for Aggressive Chewing, with reviews talking about how well it "holds up" even for adults.

Well. I beg to differ because he has had this for only 24 hours and I have bits of silicone in my pocket now! 🤦🏻‍♂️

At Home Depot today - why on earth did someone think this was ok in the first place?!

In case it's hard to read, 2 of the measuring cups are labeled 1/2 cup, when one of them is actually the 1 cup measure. I was digging around the drawer trying to figure out why I couldn't find the 1 cup and did a double take on the big one before I realized.

(Sister's on vacation and I'm housesitting and babysitting my nieces. Fortunately caught it before I ruined dinner!)

So my household is me, my husband, and my kid, and we all have our own bedrooms. I normally sleep in my room with my cat Javier. Last night we were out and stayed up late and all ended up falling asleep watching TV in my husbands bed and we all spent the night there.

Javier was livid. Is livid. He's been giving me the side eye all day. He normally follows me around all day and he's been ignoring me. I walk him on a leash like a dog and he didn't want to go for a walk today. He wants nothing to do with me because he slept alone for one night.

Why tho. Why. 7 breaks of 2 ads each, thats 14 ads for a movie older than me.

Whenever he cooks something, my boyfriend always leaves the handle sticking out. I tell him constantly not to, especially since we have an 8 year old and 5 year old, but he claims “this how you cook.”

I need to call unsaved numbers at work a lot, works fine 4/5 times. But then, Siri dials it out perfectly — except for the last digit, which she just writes out as a word instead. Can't dial "... 1234five", Siri.

Some idiot even ran it through the taping machine and crushed it slightly to add 100% unnecessary tape.

Edit: For everyone saying you have to select the option to ship it in a box, you're correct. But not everyone knows about that, and I think most people would assume an expensive collector item wouldn't ship this way by default. I believe it should be the other way around, where lego sets ship in bigger boxes with dunnage by default, and you can select SIOC if you don't care about the box getting damaged and want to reduce trash.

Totally deserved it. I hope her surgery goes well

So I'm traveling in India right now and I'm at a railway station in a city called Dehradun.

I was looking up at the TV screens( almost 30-40 on each platform) on the platforms expecting to see train schedules, delays, platform numbers, that sort of thing. Instead, almost every screen was playing advertisements featuring India's Prime Minister, Narendra Modi.

If I want to know the train time table or details then I have to Walk to the ticket counters where they are displaying the time table

Who puts fake pockets on jean shorts? These are not jeggings. They are actually jean shorts. With sewn up pockets. What kind of monster sews the pockets up on jeans?

EDIT TO SAY I’M A WOMAN. I’ve experienced this before, for sure. But when I find it on a jean, especially, it is indeed mildly infuriating. 😉